Haven’t been on here for ages, so much to catch up on.
I have my last Kadcyla on Tuesday and then should be done with being pumped with poison. No more bruises and nosebleeds and me doing impressions of Elecen from Stranger Things when my nose bleeds in public.
I still have my thigh discomfort from the needle stick/phesgo damage and aches from my node clearance (my surgeon says it’s my ribcage but I don’t know) if I sleep on that side but otherwise not doing too badly considering. I’m on Pregabalin and Duloxetine for it now and it has improved.
I have a full mane of curly hair I plan to get neatened up in the new year cos it currently looks like Shirley Temple if she had a mullet. Very ugly presently but I get lots of compliments on the curls. I can’t wait to have a cute curly bob again.
Had some sad news, after surgery and all clear earlier this year for melanoma my dad has since been diagnosed with two brain tumors. Neither are operable but he’s had radiosurgery and we’re trying to be hopeful. He’s not the same as he was and we’re having to accept our time with him is becoming even more limited and the world just feels sadder. I’m pretty numb about it all as I can’t imagine a world without him. He drove me to every chemotherapy cycle and blood test and appointment, all while recovering himself. He’s the sweetest man.
I don’t know what the new year holds but my ovarian cyst has increased in size again so I look forward to getting rid of that early next year. I’ve had an 11 day period and about 3 incidents of spotting so I don’t even know if I’m menopausal, I thought I was during my taxel chemotherapy as it stopped completely but who knows what my lady bits are doing now they’ve seemingly woken up from their chemo coma. Well if they remove an ovary (which they’ve said is likely) that may speed it along.
Toying with the idea of lipomodelling for my perky post-surgery frankenboob. Admittedly it’s more I would like them to remove my flab (I’d be happier if they chucked it away than put it in my boob, I quite like having smaller norks after years of having difficulty buying clothes that fit it’ll be great to have both smaller) but need to accept the NHS isn’t offering me free liposuction so it might end up being a load of pain and discomfort only to end up with a misshapen boob or abdomen. I don’t have to make a decision yet so we’ll see later. I am really looking forward to them getting rid of the dog-ear flap left from my node clearance though. It’s unsightly and uncomfortable.
I’m back at work but it hasn’t gone as planned. I’d hoped to be working 3 full days a week before the end of the year and I’m still only doing Wednesday afternoons and Fridays I’m almost at a full shift. I’m giving myself grace cos I’m exhausted and not pushing my body too hard cos it’s been through enough trauma the last 18 months, but I still feel like I’ve failed a bit. I hope I get some energy back soon cos I’d like to start exercising soon, I still get exhausted when just walking to and from work. I want to get back to full time work asap (if only to get my pension back!).
Anyway I wanted to wish everyone here much better luck in the new year and hopefully better health and peace for all of us. Thank you for the kind words here. We’re a tough bunch of gals and very inspiring. X