33 years old and just been diagnosed...

Hi lovely ladies

Al - thinking of you tomorrow - hope all goes well and No 2 is a walk in the park!
Nicki - glad you have turned the corner
Lulu - poor you - you need some rest honi - hope tonight is better for you.
Sal/Reemie/Anna/Caro - hope you are ok??
Had bad weekend, but feel brighter today - TAX is hard going. Still have 2 to do… Body does not feel or look like me anymore and I’ve had enough of looking like a freak… but today is a new day and I feel like I have a bit of umph to fit on again!

Keep going girls, we can do it!

xxxx

Hi jayney, i am back in the land of the living today, and it feels so good to be back. Someone still has a little voodoo doll and is continuing to stick pins in it but it feels like the nasty part of that one is over. I think its good to remember too that tomorrow we will all feel even better again.
take care
anna

Hello lovely ladies…how are you all doing?

I’ve just had a terrible week. Had 4th chemo, which I didnt think they would give me because I had a terrible cough and cold but my white bloods said ok so they did…and the chemo on top of being ill anyway really wiped me out! Ive been in bed for a week really poorly and feeling really sorry for myself ! Still today I feel better health wise but mentally Im an emotional wreck! One minute Im fine and the next minute Im sat there tears streaming down my face ! I had a sore throat in the week and my glands all swelled up which I convinced myself was the cancer spreading all over me…not just down to me being poorly…(they are now ok) Is everyone else the same or is it just me cos Im feeling low…Im constantly checking for lumps and every pain I get wherever I convince myself its bad…am I always gonna be like this from now on ? ugh it sucks !!

Anyway enough about me. Nikki…you really sound like you’ve been through it ! All that surgery and then the chemo knocking you about so much ! Everything crossed that being ‘looked after’ so much makes the 2nd one no where near as bad! My first one resulted in me ending up in hospital but the ones since havent been as bad…I pretty much write the wk after chemo off…but like Al said before its amazing how quick you bounce back after that ! Glad your feeling back to yourself though…enjoy the feeling well times and get through the crap times as best you can :slight_smile:

She…thanks so much for the parcel ! I need a bit of practice at creating some eyebrows…its not happening at the moment…but I think that has more to do with me not being able to see with my eyes streaming etc…thank you so much xxx

Al…hope your 2nd chemo went well and your hair is still holding on in there???

Lulu…like you I’ve had problems with my veins…Im just praying they hold out for my last 2 chemos aswell !!! And as for my neuts…Im injecting myself to keep mine high…the things you do eh! Im like you a bit of retail therapy always makes me feel better !

Anna hope your still feeling well? Caro, Reemie & Becky not heard off you lately…hope you are good?

Love to you all xxx

Hi, glad you are feeling better today, just try and remember that with each day you will feel more and more better. This one has been by far the worst one for me, i didnt get to sleep till about 4 in the morning as my lower back kept getting a cramping pain, soooo painful. Paracetamol and a hot water bottle helped but only lying flat on my tummy (not easy with an 8cm tumour in the breast) but did it and finally got to sleep. I woke up an hour ago. I think the back pain is due to the injection i had though, will speak to oncologist at next appointment.
take care
anna

Anna I think your right…day at a time. Im just impatient and wanna get through all this treatment and reach the end of all this!

Are you having your surgery after your chemo then? My tumour was 7cm…which seems so much bigger than everyone elses on here !!

Hope you get a better nights sleep tonight hunxx

Hi, Yes, i am due to have my last chemo on the 9th December if all goes well, so 3 more to go. They said they will be aiming to do surgery about 3 weeks after that, so i am guessing it will be at the beginning of January. i cant wait to get rid of this thing, im sick of thinking is it getting bigger? is the chemo working? I must say though at my last appointment the consultant did say that he felt it was getting smaller, im not sure since having this other chemo though, but then maybe it just feels bigger because its reacting to new chemo?
Are you chemo first too??
take care
anna

Hi All,

well, can’t quite believe it, but here I am one day post chemo, feeling pretty brilliant. Hard to think that at the same time last cyle I was hooked up to a drip in hospital. Hope I’m not speaking too soon though!

Had chemo at 10.30 - chemo nurse was male and poor thing could not get the canula in for love nor money. He was getting really agitated and I was trying not to scream each time the plastic hit where it shouldn’t. He has apparently been doing this for 12 years and has never had to call for assistance - I have some lovely bruises!! He called another nurse over who found a vein on the underside of my foream and got it in first time - girl power!! Then I asked to go to the toilet before he started. Well - I was feeling quite giddy as I’d had some lorazepam, went to the disabled toilet with drip in tow and on the way out because I was concentrating on manouvering my drip the fire door slammed into my head. I really thought that he would be able to see a ring of stars around it. I sat back down in chemo lounge, explained what I had done in case I passed out and then jokingly said to Brian (I think his name was) that if a bruise appeared I’d tell my hubby that he was getting so fed up trying to find a vein that he went for one in my head - suffice to say, he didn’t laugh.

‘Brian’ was actually very nice and very clued up. He said that I wouldn’t feel as bad this time as the first time your body has chemo all your organs go into a panic as it has never happened before, but 2nd time they’re like ‘oh here we go again’ and hence cope better.

Sal - I’ve got to start the injections for 5 days tonight as well as neuts were a bit low.

I think, I’m feeling so much better as I feel I have more power over the meds. This is what I did.
8.30am - lorzepam
10.30 - chemo - through drip dexamethasone, cyclizine and ordansetron
1.00pm - home
2.00pm - cyclizine and domperidone
4.00pm - ordansetron
6.00pm - huge vomit (tmi)
7.00pm - cylcizine and domperidone
9.00pm - little vomit
10.00 - lorazepam

Fab sleep intil 8.00am this morning when I took ordansetron and dexamethasone, followed by cylcizine and domperidone at 10.30am. Well, it works for me even though I’m a rattling pill box!!!

Hoping this good feeling will last, I know that I will be very tired once stopping the dexamethasone, but tiredness I can cope with - just not vomiting. Is it likely I could go back to vomiting again???

Hi Jayney and Anna - thanks for your wishes and glad you are feeling abit better - hope you get some better nights sleep Anna.

Sal - sorry you’ve had a rough 4th chemo, keep on chugging lovely and relish the good days, we will get there.

Nicki - got your pm, sorry its taken 10 days to feel normal again - I really feel for you as you think you’re never going to feel well again, but you do and you are so good for you.

Update on hair - well, it was going so patchy that poor old hubby shaved it for me - it was getting so sore. Am having great fun trying out head scarves, but no wig yet!!! Lady is coming on Friday - so that should be interesting as she is still expecting me to have some hair - hope she brings a nice selection.

Love to all

Al
xx

Oh, if anyone fancies being friends on facebook (there’s quite a gathering of us on there now) you can find me under Alison Colenso (quite easy to search for me as I’m pretty unique!)

Hi,
Al you do sound like you have a tough time with the vomiting, could you maybe ask for different antisickness pills?
I was interested that you took lorazepam before your chemo treatment, i got some diazepam off my gp just in case, but didnt take them. I did ask my oncologist about them and he said if you can manage without them. i think he meant because they are addictive.(i didnt remind him that i work as a nurse in a drug dependency unit) I am tempted to take them the next time though as i hate being so anxious. Do you find that they make much difference? well apart from making you headbut doors. Did you get a bruise??
take care
anna

Al sounds like an eventful chemo session !! Im so like you…tiredness I can cope with but not sickness and nausea !! It reminds me of being pregnant when I first have my chemo…the heartburn…the tiredness and I get real bad nausea…even cooking the kids dinner, the smells make me retch !!! Sent you a ‘friend request’ on face book by the way…

I wasnt keen on doing the jabs for my neuts at first, but I do it without thinking now! Kayleigh my 5yr old helps me aswell…not ideal but makes her feel like shes helping me get better so there you go!! Are you still working Al?

Very brave decision with the hair…I was the same…my head was so sore that when it came to shaving it off (something I dreaded) I was glad to see it go! Im kind of used to not having it now (just dont like how it makes me look ill) but Im used to my wig…I went and had it cut yesterday…ha that was strange…had it thinned out and layered…apparently I look more like me now !

Hello to all you other girls…hope your doing well xxxx

Hello girlies.

Sal, so sorry you had such a horrid 4th chemo; you’re two thirds of the way there now though! I’m the same as you, every ache and pain and the fear and panic sets in. I’ve had lower back pain on and off almost since my surgery and at times I’m so convinced it’s bone mets I get so panicked. Do you have a pic of your new wig do?! I also had mine cut and thinned out, as there was way too much hair on it and it just looked so “wiggy”!! Keep up with the retail therapy hon: this week I’ve purchased two pairs of stilletos (one of which are a pair of Louboutins!) and I must say it’s certainly cheered me up :wink:

Al, well done on getting through no. 2; sorry it was a bit traumatic! Luckily I haven’t had any problems with them getting the canula in (touch wood). Perhaps it’s because they soak my arm in hot water beforehand to plump the veins up; maybe you could request that?Glad you’re not as ill as last time though. It’s funny, so far I’ve had almost identical SEs with all 3 of my chemos: Nausea/queasiness for about 3 days, tiredness/breathlessness at times, very sore veins in arm. I just hope the effects don’t get worse with the last 3! Well done on the head shave too. Must admit I really hate wearing scarves as I feel like such a cancer victim!

One thing that concerns me slightly is that so many of you ladies are having to inject yourselves because of low neuts. Do you know how low your neuts were??? My neuts have been quite low too (1.7 on the day of chemo) but nobody has mentioned anything about the injections…

I’m also on Facebook, you’ll see me listed as one of Al’s friends so feel free to add me too!

Love to everyone, Caro xxxx

Hi all - know what you mean about the aches and pains - everything is cancer related - i actually had a really bad stomach ache this morning and I know what it is but there is a little voice in my ear nagging all the while!
Al I am on the same drugs as you by the looks of it and also take Lorazepam before - I think the onc thought it was the only way to get there but was sick first time only once and second time not at all - No 3 is next Thursday and then halfway there! Are you all having FEC by the way? I have the option to change to TAx for 4 5 & 6 but I seem to be managing on the FEC so may stick with it.
incidentally also had my wig thinned and cut - it is a really odd feeling! Used the cold cap but although it has slowed the hair loss I think it will be total by number six - I am just trying to hang onto my fringe God knows why!!!
I have bought loads of hats as I cant face scarves either.
Keep going girls!!
Denise x

Hi all,

Just wanted to say have a lovely weekend feel so much more normal this week and really looking forward to getting out and about all your positiv messages really helped…

I too am on facebook (and live on it!!! drives my husband insane) Im friends with alison if you search Nicki Powell. Think ive just found you Caro and added youa s a friend xx

Hope everyone is feeling okay and has a good weekend

xxxxxxxxx

Hi all,

thanks for all the friend requests on facebook - hubby was most amused!

Well, day 4 and feel tired, but am up and obviously on the computer. I’ve stopped the desamethasone and ordansetron and lorazapem as didn’t want to turn into a complete junky and am sure I am through the worst now. Will be going back to bed with Jeremy Kyle shortly - if you know what I mean!!

Denise - all mine will be FEC and I think the lorazapem has really helped this time, but have stopped taking it now as don’t want to get addicted - I will ask for it again next time though.

Caro - I had the my arm soaked in hot water but it didn’t really help - guess I’ve just got dodgy veins. They’re not really sore though, just bruised, will have to wait and see what they say next time. Good for you on your shoe purchase - I love shoes, but have fat old feet so I have to really be in the mood to look!! My neuts were 1.8 the day before chemo no. 2 and apparently this is not so low that they wouldn’t do chemo, but low enough to do the injections - I didn’t ask, they just told me to. Maybe it depends on what your baseline neuts are as well as to what is low for you??? Just a thought - worth asking though.

Sal - I am still working - though not this week obviously. I’m going back for 3 days next week and then its half term so not too bad really - and I really love my job!

Anna - I really think the lorazapem made the difference this time. I have slept beautifully for 12 hours each night ( I took lorazapem he night before, the night of and the night after chemo, then stopped). Just having a good nights sleep makes you more able to cope with the SE’s during the day. Will definitely take again next time. And I have got a small bruise above my eyebrow!!

Well, I can hear Jeremy calling so can’t keep him waiting.

Love to all
Al
xxx

hi all

lovely to read your posts i especially love the louboutan story and have mentioned it to my hubby as a matter of recovery although im hankering after a chanel bag after all this cr*p. My chemo was ok i faired much better than expected (hooray) had white cell injection and antibiotics for ten days. Im relieved to hear someone else had heartburn i will ask for gaviscon next time as it nearly killed me. Worst part for me was that they had to change my antibiotics as the first ones really disagreed with me.

I saw wig lady last week and i have to say first couple looked like road kill so i was not amused until i did find one similar to my cut at the moment so i have ordered that - will post a piccy when i get it. My hair started to shed yesterday and i cried loads in the bath (which looked like my dog had been in it after i got out!!!) my little girl cried when she saw the amount of hair which made me sad.

Brighteyes…glad your chemo wasnt too bad. My first 3 were fine…its just been this last one thats knocked me for six but I think thats because I was ill to start with. My consultant said it was the steroids that gave me heartburn…that was worse than the chemo at points !!

Just wanted to say my little girl was sad when she saw my hair coming out…and when I first have it shaved…she cried and even wrote me a letter saying she was sad that it was coming out (shes 5!!) but now shes fine…she loves stroking my head and is excited its started to grow back and the other day she said ‘Mommy you may have no hair but your the most beautiful person in the world’…aww so lovely !! I dont think Ill ever be happy about losin my hair but its a means to an end and Ive got used to it…for now!

Caro…I havent got a pic of my new wig do…I seem to shy away from the camera now. I will get one tho and post it. Dont know why I didnt have it thinned out earlier cos it looks so less wiggy now! I dont know how low my neuts were…I’ve told my doc I dont want any info I just wanna get on with it…so Ill have to leave that question for the other girls !!

And by the way Ive become one of Al’s friends on Facebook…Sally Flynn if anyone wants to add me.

Love to you all xxx

hey all! just wanted to let you know that i haven’t done a disappearing act! ive had gastroenteritis… and so has my baby … and so has my husband… lovely. our house has been a no-go zone for the last week!!! slowly on the mend now… i will catch up on all of your postings when i have more time, i just wanted to send love and hugs to all of you battling your way thro chemo…xxxx

Hey girls…how are you all ??? Redcell I was wondering what was going on with you…hope you and your boys are all well now !

Off to have my 5th chemo tomorrow…then I can say Ive only got one left…yey !! Not looking forward to it cos I was quite ill after the 4th one…but hey ho…have no choice so just getting on with it!

Random question for any of you that may know the answer…do any of you still go swimming? Is it ok to go? And if it is do you wear anything on your head ?

Hope your all doing ok xxx

Hi all

Just dropping in to see how you are doing - had a rubbish week and this is my good week. Just tired, maybe the effect of 6 chemos and had problems with my little dog - hopefully she is on the mend now, but had lots of stress and tears. Chemo No 7 on Monday and already dreading it and then first Herceptin on Tues (will be joining your club sal).

I did swim when on FEC but only in my good week (ONC said this was fine and if I was going to get an infection I would do anyway, if I swam or not). Swimming was good for me, makes me feel good (I wore a swim hat though!). Not swam since on TAX, fear I would drown as have no energy :frowning:

Some ONC are dead against swimming pools, because of infection. I avoided busy times when there were lots of kiddies and didn’t pick anything up.

Hope you are all doin well and SEs are not too bad.

Keep going girls, we’re getting there.

Much love
Jayney
xxx

Ahh good to hear off you Jayney!!! This week is usually my good week and I have felt well in myself but Ive been a bit of an emotional wreck this week…think it might have been due to being so ill the previous 2 wks…so Ive been feelin pretty low…and also my hubby has had serious man flu so Ive had to stay away from him and have the girls to myself…its been tough!!!

Were takin the girls on a weekend break in 2 weeks…my hubby has been taking them whilst Ive been ill but I know when were away they are gonna want me to go to. Just not sure its a good idea cos it will be full of kids…its a Haven park…it will be the week before chemo when Im usually at my best…hmmm Did you just wear a normal swim hat?

Sorry I missed you at the Brum get together…would have been nice to have met up ! Hope your dog is ok now and all the best for Mon xx

Sal, good luck today with your 5th chemo; you’re nearly at the finish line!! I haven’t been swimming whilst on chemo because I’m a totally paranoid whimp! I think if it’s important to you and it’s something you really enjoy doing then you should do it, like Jayney. I’ve been drinking gallons of wine whilst on chemo which is probably not a good idea, but hey, it’s something I really enjoy, lol!!!

Jayney huni, so sorry you’ve been having such a stressful time with your dog being ill. I’m sure everything will turn out ok. Best of luck on Monday with your next swamping; I have my 4th FEC on Monday too (fingers crossed neuts will be good enough) so will be thinking of you whilst they’re pumping me full of cr*p!

Becky hope you’re feeling better now (physically and emotionally!). Good to hear from you.

I’m in the process of organising a support group for younger women with bc in my area. I’ve had a few women call over the last couple of weeks, which is really positive and encouraging (was beginning to think I was the only person under 50 in Plymouth!). It’s lovely talking to you ladies on here, but it’ll be nice to actually meet others in person.

Anyway, lots of love and well wishes to you all.
Caro xxx
PS. I finally got my CLs; they’re gorg!! Will post pic on fb when I get chance.