Excellent Cherub. I am so glad you have had such a lovely time on a day that has the potential to be very emotional. Long may the good times continue!!!
Thankyou for this thread. Sometimes we get shot down in flames for being positive, but there is a lot of evidence from psychological studies to show that a positive outlook can make a difference to many areas of life. I know this thing is difficult and we all go through days of hell and despair but overall if we can live each day well then that has to be good? I am not always successful at being positive - far from it - but I will keep on working at it. I met a lady who is 90 and had two types of cancer in the past, breast cancer about 25 years ago! inspirational.
keep smiling
alex
I love those stories Alexamay09⊠a woman in her 90sâŠwonderful!!!
Elsbeth , thank you for starting this thread i havent been on the forums for a while now as i too was begining to despair with it all, but i just wanted to say it was so refreshing to see your post and to read all the positive comments. I was DX July 07 and in that time have seen so many posts being shot down through talk of positivity and such, so thank you i think a positive little corner of the forums is very much needed also .
I look after 2 ladies both in their late 80s who were DX with BC 25 & 30 yrs ago and both are fine and doing well . I also look after a man with a another type of cancer (NH Lymphoma) he was DX when he was 26 yrs old and is now 45 and also doing well too, even though he was given a very poor prognosis at the time.
Ive always had a positve outlook to life ,its not always been easy and like all of us here have been in that black hole more times than i want to remember but while the cancer may have my body i wont allow it to have my mind or spirit
I found this on the other BC site which too is inspirational i think ,hope it is to you too.
Long-Term BC Survivors:
Betty Ford - 34 years! (diagnosed in 1974)
Nancy Reagan - 21 years!
Shirley Temple-Black 36 years! (diagnosed in 1972)
Ruby Dee - over 30 years!
Sandra Day OâConnor - 26 years! (diagnosed in 1982)
Jill Eikenberry - 22 years!
Kate Jackson - 21 years!
Ann Jillian - 23 years! (diagnosed in 1985 at 35 years old; had a child in 1992)
Richard Roundtree - 15 years!
Marcia Wallace - 23 years!
Diahann Carroll - 10 years!
Rue McClanehan - 11 years!
Olivia Newton John - 15 years!
Linda Ellerbee - 17 years!
All the very best to all on this site , Keep those positive thoughts!!!
Lindiloo x
Elsbeth, you did a fab thing starting this thread, good on you girl xxxx
I am 2 1/2 years on, I have a friend who is 9 years on and she has a friend who is 11 years on. All of us dx in our forties.
I think it is nice to see the other side of the coin and that people do survive cancer. I also respect that the isnt the case for some and I donât know how I would react or live my life if I had secondary cancer. However, clearly, there are those who do survive and it is good for the morale to see this. I remember a few months ago a similar post about the upside of chemo which was a very tongue in cheek, black humour post which caused such a furore amongst some of the forum users. I just hope people on here can let those who want to take comfort (and why on Earth shouldnât we) in the fact that others have survived for many years after diagnosis alone.
PS, my mother had breast cancer in both breasts and survived another 15 years before dying of heart disease. Her treatment was very primitive in those days, just mastectomies so I take comfort in this on a personal level
If at times i couldnât have laughedâŠ
at my hair falling out,
not getting to a loo in time in central london while on chemo,
my nose dripping constantly and landing on things at the checkout when i couldnât find a tissue
sitting on the loo all evening in a friends flat because i couldnât poo and hime phoning his mum and she suggesting vaseline ( three months earlier our evenings were filled with passion)!!!
the one and only time i wore a wig, catching it on the zip on my coat and it promptly come off âŠover my face
A sanitary towel i was using as padding during RADS worming its way up my top and sticking its head above my neckline on a busy train coming back from central londonâŠand not realising and wondering why every one was looking at my chestâŠ
âŠif i couldnât have laughed at all these things i think i would have crumpled
I have just had an email from a survior of 19 years the mum of my daughters boyfriend
xxxxx
Hi Rhian, I was reading your post and I hope you donât mind me saying and I mean it kindly it made me chuckle, some of your list reminds me of me and how I was, but the runny nose is still with me. Hope you are keeping ok take care junieliz
Hi Junielz âŠi hope it made you smile, i think back and think of those and so many other incidents and its what keeps me sane.
is the runny nose because of no nose hair :0
rhian xx
Hi Everyone on this lovely thread.
I take so much pleasure in the simple things in life now. I have many different birdfeeders in my garden and from my chair today I have seen one wren, 2 robins, a blackbird, 2 greenfinches, one gold-finch, many bluetits, great tits and a coaltit and numerous sparrows. Last night when the security light went on in the garden I watched that evening, a fox, and 3 different hedgehogs having their supper from the ground feedersâŠI love the sea and walking on a beach and the views of Edinburgh from the top of Arthurâs seat ( on the rare occasions I can manage some of the way up). But I want to tell you about a poem that I learnt by heart at school. It has helped me through some difficult times. It is called âLeisureâ By Willian Henry Davies who died in 1940.
What is life if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare.
No time to stand beneath the boughs,
And stare as long as sheep or cows.
No time to see, when woods we pass,
Where squirrels hide their nuts in grass.
No time to see, in broad daylight,
Streams full of stars like skies at night.
No time to turn at Beautyâs glance,
And watch her feet, how they can dance.
No time to wait till her mouth can
Enrich that smile her eyes began.
A poor life this, if full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare.
I hope you donât find this too âcheezyâ girls. But sometimes our minds âcannot see the woods from the treesâ. Hope you are having a âgood dayâ. The sun is out here in Bonny Scotland. Love Val XXX
That is a real fav of mine i read it at my dads funeral, mainly because i hadnât seen him for almost a year before he died, I spoke to him lots but never got to see him living in London young children a job, renovating a house, but really i should have made time and that poem said it all. I donât mean it to be a sad thing it just was how it was.
thanks Val xxx
I admit I was chuckling at Rhian too. I used to suffer from something my OH referred to as âAFFâ, otherwise known as âAtrocious Farting on FECâ syndrome. It got that bad at times I was scared to go anywhere as it was so loud (although thankfully not offensive) and if we went to the movies OH would say âjust break wind in the really loud bits of the actionâ. Casino Royale was on release at the time, great for me as I was able to let rip all the way through it.
I had another incident at the pictures when I was on rads. We went to see Panâs Labyrinth and of course being Spanish you had to concentrate on the subtitles. Unfortunately I had an unexpected stabbing pain in my rib which caused me to jump in the seat and yell âow!â really loudly. I am convinced the man behind me thought I was nuts and he gave me a really dirty look on the way out.
Oh, and my hair started falling out during a very shouty episode of Eastenders which I never watch (OH is a real EE and he says itâs an insult so itâs unofficially banned in our house lol). I donât really think Iâve watched it since because by the end of the half hour I was clutching big handfuls of hair.
unfortunately the weather is awful in Hampshire today but I can see many birds from my windows. At 4.15 they all come into my garden and eat the fat balls and seed i have left everyday. Despite being in the midst of depression at the moment, i am trying to find some small simple things to enjoy and to take one day or even hour at a time. I do like nature and animals and they do give me pleasure. My poor cat keeps going beserk if i get upset and runs around the house. As I become calm, he does too (now asleep on a bean bag downstairs. I used to live in the countryside proper but now in a small town. Although it is quiet here sometimes i do miss the place where I used to live.
yes , I like the leisure poem too. I have a book by my computer with all my favourite poems in them and have a read once in a while.
R xxx
Two different kinds of positive story for you :
BC survivor:
My Great Aunt had BC in the early 1970s and had mx. She died a few years ago, in her 80s, of something unrelated and never had a recurrence etc. Until my dx this July, I didnât even know she had had it ( I was only little in the early 70âs!).
Special Moment:
Had a really peaceful half hour last night. I put on my relaxation CD at about 7pm, but my daughter (9) came in saying she had a tummy ache. I asked her if she wanted to lie down with me and listen to the CD while I rubbed her tummy. She agreed. She became very peaceful and snuggled up to me, eventually falling asleep.It was so calm and lovely to have her lying there.I did not want to wake her to tell her to get ready for bed, but when I did she said she had loved the CD and asked could we listen to it again together sometime.which we definitely will do.
I am having a down day today so thank you all for this positive thread, it has helped tremendously. I hope some of you will find something positive in my stories.
Love
Anna xx
I put a relaxation CD on in the background and light an incense stick or cone every night when I go to bed. Iâve been doing this ever since I went for counselling last year and find I sleep soundly with no problems. If I wake up thinking about being ill I just say to the thoughts âgo away, I donât want you here to bother me, you can leave just as you cameâ and I doze off again. Believe me, it really works.
Hi All,
I hate that word positive ⊠unless it is accompanied by something practical.
âYou have to stay positiveâ well meaning friends say at the outset of your journey through this dismal disease. Oh, I was positive all right.
I was positive I had cancer, I was positive it was going to kill me, I was positive I loathed the treatment and its side effects, I was positive my hair wouldnât grow back and I was positive I wouldnât make it through to the end.
But as it turned out, I positively didnât need a mastectomy. I positively wasnât as ill on chemo as Iâd been led to expect. I postively sailed through radiotherapy. Iâm positively still here 2 years from diagnosis and positive that hope springs eternal
I positively have been down in deep dark places but I positively donât go there anything like so often these days.
One of the positive thoughts that helps me climb out of those dark holes is that my Mum had breast cancer aged 40, when I was just 8 and went on to live for 36 more years. My friends Mum had breast cancer around the same time and is still going strong at 89.
Only one negative I canât do anything about ⊠my triple negative
status!
A L ++++++++++++++++++++++++
Ah but AL remember that 8 years and be positive you will get there!
Just want to say a big big thank you for this thread.
Was dx in Feb this year, had 6 months chemo, mx, now 2 weeks through rads and feeling in need of a boost - you ladies have done it again!!
Hugs to all.XX
Hang on in there RhodaBee, make sure you give yourself treats and moment of you time, its about two weeks in the rads start to make you feel tired and for me a bit achy. Keep slapping on the aqueos cream and drinking lots of fluidsâŠthe odd glass of vino helps 
xxx