Hi Jules,I think we’re probably quite alike.I don’t know about you but since this scare started i’ve been on the net everyday looking up every single possibility and worrying myself sick.I’m totally reliant on diazepam and i know i’m going to have to take quite a few on thursday.I keep thinking the worst and imagining all these awful scenarios of what could happen when i go to the hospital.I’m also thinking of how i’m going to tell my daughters if it’s bad news.I know it’s not a healthy way to look at things but i just can’t help it.I know all the statistics like 85% of lumps are benign and because we’re young it should be ok,etc but when you come in here and read everyones stories there are so many young women in here going through hell and it’s just heartbreaking and terrifying.You can’t help but think ‘why should i be any different?’.I got myself in such a state last night i was looking at wigs on the net and i haven’t even had a test yet.I’m sure everything will be ok with your results but i can imagine how you feel in that until you have a concrete ‘everythings fine’ you will worry.Keep in touch.Lots of love x
Oh dear sweetie, you are really suffering, I think you are more of a worrier than me, even I didn’t start looking at wigs etc. I looked at things for a couple of days and then thought no enough, and I refuse now to look at anything, the best thing you can do, and do it tomorrow please, and that is ring the helpline on here the ladies are fantastic.
But I want to say something to you ok, and its the one thing that has kept me going and I hope it does for you. This site is full of very brave but alot of very ill ladies. This site represents a tiny proportion of the population and the reason they are on here is because they are very ill. Thousands of ladies have lumps and are fine, and also thousands of ladies get over BC and are not on here because they are getting on with there lives and forgetting about BC. I want you to try and hold on to the fact that most lumps are benign and most bcs are curable, if you can I think you will start to calm down a bit. If you want to talk to me in a private at all, just send me a private message on here and I will try and support you as much as I can.
You will be ok, I promise you, know matter what you will find the strength to cope.
Hugs Jules xxxxxxxx
Appointment tomorrow.Had a terrible day today involving a major panic attack.All my family have called tonight wishing me well for tomorrow and all of them saying ‘it will be nothing’.I just hope i don’t have to tell them different.Tonight i keep feeling like i may be getting a temperature or getting ill and i won’t be able to go but i’m sure it’s just psychosymatic.I’ve never experienced fear like this in my life.I’m just so scared about what they are going to tell me.I really don’t know what i’ll do if it’s bad news.I’m getting up at 4 to start medicating myself so i can go.I’ll let you know what happens.Thanks for listening. x
Hi Dita
Good luck for tomorrow hun. Mine is tomorrow at 10.50 so I will meet you back here.
Yvonne xx
Good luck to you both for tomorrow! I will keep my fingers crossed for you dita that you will be told its nothing and you can come on here and celebrate! good luck!
Good luck too Yvonne, I have sent you a message on FP earlier wishing you good luck not sure if you read it, but good luck again!!!
xxxxxx
Thank you so much.You ladies are fabulous beyond belief.Yvonne,good luck for your appoinment too.I’ll be thinking of you.As for you Jules,you’re a bloody star and i wish i could give you both a massive hug!i’ll post tomorrow as soon as i get back.Lots of love xx
Dita I am glad that I can be of some help to you, as I know only too well what your going through. I really really hope you get told its all ok and you can come back tomorrow night and tell us your good news. I am going to send you a private message with my email address incase you want to talk in private to me, and I will do all I can to help put you at ease. There have been some wonderful ladies on this site who have really kept me going so its nice if i can do the same back for you.
My bloody stiches are weeping and hurting tonight lol thats why I cant sleep and are up at silly oclock lol
Jules xxxxxxx
Dita if your around, please come on and let me know you are ok, as been thinking about you alot today.
Jules xxxxx
Hi Dita and Jules
Its good news from me, I have been taken off the books and put back in the system 3 yearly mammos. My problems are apparently hormonal which surprised me cos I thought it was something to do with the implants. The consultant said that I have to check regularly for any changes and any more discharge, also look for rashes etc, normal stuff really. I hope your results are good too. Where are you Dita I hope it went ok for you, and Jules I will be keeping an eye on you.
Take Care
Yvonne xx
Great news Yvonne, really pleased for you. I am worried about Dita as she was in a right state last night and she has not come back on to post which is worrying me that maybe she has not had good news, so I keep coming on to look out for her. If she does have to wait for results I want to try and give her lots of support as that is what has got me through this horrible waiting game.
xxx
Dear Yvonne,So sorry i haven’t been on sooner but i’ve been deeply asleep due to excessive tranquillisers! I’m very lucky and everything went fine.Turns out i have a cyst in my breast.When they told me i burst into tears and hugged the nurse! I was still very anxious but the staff at the hospital were fantastic and very understanding.I’m thrilled that everything is ok with you.Fingers crossed for Jules now but i’m sure she will be fine.Thank you so much for your kindness and support.I’m not going anywhere though.I still want to come in here for some reason,i don’t know why.I don’t know if i can help anyone but i can’t just forget this place.It’s really opened my eyes.Lots of love to you x
Dita thank you for your lovely email, I am over the moon for you, and have written you a much more detailed message on your private email.
Love Jules xxx