I was diagnosed with breast cancer this week at my local BCU … I’ve got a large lump (maybe 5-6cm) in the fatty tissue in the bottom half of my left breast, it’s invasive but I’m not sure yet whether it’s ductal or lobular. It’s strongly ER+, less strongly PR+ and they didn’t have the HER+ results back. I’m starting to get my head around all of this and now have a long list of qu’s for my next appt scheduled following my MRI scan!
Although I’m single and live on my own I have some really good friends who are like family … I’m beginning to learn how unique everyone’s journey/circumstances/BC, and I know it’ll be different for each person you tell, but I’ve only told a couple of friends so far and would be appreciative of any advice/insights from your experiences of sharing your news.
Also, I’ve always slept on my front … any advice on learning how to get to sleep on my back? Thank you ?
Firstly, allow me to say how sorry I am to hear of you initial diagnosis, but to congratulate you on coming onto here so soon. A great place to receive help, support and advice.
I’m a bit confused, are you saying you have yet to have your MRI scan, for a more clear differential diagnosis, with appointment after with Onco specialist to discuss the treatment required? Or that you’ve had the MRI, and yet to have your onco apptmnt to discuss treatments?
That’s tough being on your own. I understand your friends being family. I’m in the same situ now, since losing all my direct blood family, though had my Mum during my diag and treatments 2006 and 2007 (an absolute rock), but sadly no longer. Good that you have some really good friends to support you.
You’ve already told some of your friends. Do you wait until your treatment plan to then tell the rest? Well in once sense, the sooner you tell everyone, the quicker they too can get their heads around it all, and the sooner they can start rallying round to help support you. Personally, if I were a friend, I want to know sooner.
Sleeping on your back? - I was the same. Used to sleep on my side. As you’re one sided for any treatment, you still have the option to sleep on the opposite side, with your treated side uppermost. Or lie on your back, prop yourself up with a pillow against the treated side, to prevent yourself rolling onto it and disturbing yourself during the night. You will find you DO get used to it though.
Good luck, flower. Please DO let us know what’s going on with you and how you are, won’t you.
Hi Aldernay, super advice from Delly which I endorse . Excellent that you’ve found us. If you need to make sense of your pathology report can I suggest downloading the extremely helpful advice leaflet on this site. It certainly helped me get my head around everything, and helped to formulate questions for my surgeon. As for telling people…well, we are all different . I’ve got a gob on me, and I couldn’t have kept quiet if you’d paid me! However, loving those close to me meant the news(!) needed to be delivered sensitively. It was like a media event. I didn’t tell anyone until I had a firm diagnosis and a plan in place. First were our two sons. An e mail saying to ring me - how could I phone one before the other? First one to ring heard first. Second, my nearest neighbours and best friends who were given the job of telling other good neighbours who I suspect were wondering just what was going on. Thirdly, my three oldest and far flung friends who would not have been privy to all the comings and goings as we dashed around hospitals and clinics. I started my spiel by saying I had bad news and I didn’t want sympathy. I’d cried enough tears by then, and couldn’t be doing with any more. I did ask for practical help in the house as I knew it would be tough for hubby, and it was! Words of sympathy are easy, but acts of kindness are gold. ?. My elder son downloaded the helpful pamphlet on this site on how to tell children. An excellent publication.
Probably far too much information, and you need to do what’s right for you. Good luck for the future. X
P.S us and our best friends / neighbours got royally pi****d that night! ?
P.P.S. Get one of this V shaped pillows to prop you up and stop you turning over. X
I have been recently diagnosed too with breast cancer, mine is invasive. I have to undergo another biopsy to see if it has spread all over my breast and I am waiting for more results. That will determine my treatment, I’m definitely feeling overwhelmed but each day I appear to be having a better day. I’m doing a lot of mindfulness and researching foods that are good for you such as green tea, turmeric and greens in general.
Any advice on keeping oneself sane? I would really appreciate the advice. As even though each day I feel a tad better. It’s still very turbulent.
Hi Alderney it looks like we are both at the same stage . I found out Tuesday and am meeting surgeon Friday, it is a lot to take in but the thing that I can’t understand is I have suffered from anxiety for 23 years worrying about health issues and finally I have got something to worry about I’m fine and coping with it! I’m taking one day at a time approach as I can’t change anything and trust i will be looked after. Hope your ok xxxxx