Aged 29 Newly Dx & confused

Public Archive
1

Hi all.
Im 29 years old and a mum to 2 girls aged 20months and 3yrs. I have recently (last week) had a biopsy and confirmation that I have bc. The lump is really large and resting on my chest wall as well as being able to feel it near my nipple (My boobs are a H cup so I didnt notie a lump until is was well established).

I am concerned that the lump seems to be getting bigger too. i have tested neg for the estrogen thing(???sorry) and was told by the DR that I am looking at a full mascectomy due to the size of the lump and the position and am booked in on the 28th Jan. But I have also been offered chemo to start before the masc if I wish due to my age in the hope that the lump reduces and I could have a lumpectomy (dr is worried about mental trauma as I am still suffering post natal depression).

I am owrried sick that if I go straight for the op and any cancer cells are floating about they may develop further but if i go for the chemo first and hope to save part of my boob by hoping that chemo shrinks it that it wont work and the breast cancer could spread anyway.

Im prob not so clued up as i should be but im terrified. I only had a heart op 3 years ago and was diagnosed with Ulcerated Collitis last year, so on top of the cancer Im worried that the effects of cheo etc could weaked my heart and make my collitis worse. I have spent all weekend stressing.

Thanks for reading, Michelle

2

I’m 34 and single, was diagnosed 22nd Sept 08, been receiving chemo ever since, n ot had surgery yet, if you need someone to talk to I’m here

Sharon

3

Hi Michelle

Welcome to the forums, you may find BCC’s resource pack helpful, it has been designed for those newly diagnosed. If you would like a copy just follow the link below to order a copy:

breastcancercare.org.uk//content.php?page_id=7514

In addition to the valuable support you will receive here, if you feel it would help to talk to someone in confidence about your upcoming surgery or any other concerns you may have, then please give the helpline a call, the staff here are all either breast care nurses or people who have personal experience of breast care issues. They can offer you a listening ear, support and information about other services we can offer you to help you through this difficult time. The number to call is 0808 800 6000 the lines open Monday to Friday 9am - 5pm and Saturdays 9am - 2pm.

The following link will also take you to some of our publications about breast cancer and younger women which you may find useful to read, you can order them online or via the helpline on the number above:

breastcancercare.org.uk/content.php?page_id=5256

I hope this is of some help to you.

Best wishes
Lucy

4

Hi Michelle…Wow you’ve had your fair share of problems already, sure you deserve a break!
Sorry you’ve had to join us here but you’re in good hands…I’m Lauren, 25yrs and have 2 kiddies aged 19 months and almost 4yrs! It’s hard work being healthy and having kiddies let alone going through this, your not alone and will be totally fine. It’s been found and treatment is starting so whatever has to be done to make you better will be.
No decision is easy to make i know, your head will be all over the place and i’m sure your consultant can put you in touch with a breast care nurse who can give you some much needed support and advice and help you make the decision that is right for you…
I was told that i had to have a mastectomy and then chemo so thankfully didn’t have to make any decisions myself but i know others who’ve had chemo first and the tumor has shrunk to a size where the breast can be saved…At least that way you can see the chemo working…Personally i would opt for the mastectomy and get rid straight away and start chemo after to mop up but thats me, and mentally i was strong enough to cope…Everyone is different… Do you have support around you?
Stay positive and your body will put up a good fight.
Keep us updated, and you can always rely on us ladies for support.
Lauren xxx

5

Hi Michelle,

So sorry you’ve had to join us on here, but i’m sure you will find lots of help and support on here. WE ARE ALL BEHIND YOU.

I was dx Jan08 with a 13mm tumour that was triple neg, I too have two small children aged 2 and 5 at dx. I’ve had a lumpectomy, chemotheraphy and radiotheraphy, in the begining all that was very daughting and I was terrified, but I’ve come through it and have started building my life again. i’m not going to lie - it is tough, but you just do it, because you have too. I’m a district nurse and always swore that if i was dx with cancer I would’nt want to be here, until it knocked on my door step - very different story.
You’ll be fine. I know that’s easy to say, but just take one day at a time, no-one knows what the future holds for any of us and keep going, life is so precious.
i’m here for you,
Take care

Paula xx remember one day at a time xxx

6

Hi

I was dx july 07 with a 30mm tumour had lumpectomy and node clearance, due to my results i had chemo and a delayed mastectomy with rads. Personally if i had the choice i would opt for the mastectomy first hand and get on with it - which ever u choose it will be tough but u will cope and find the strength to fight the disease.
I am 36 with 4 children and it is tough with the treatments but take every day as it comes and dont take anything for granted.
Life is too precious - this may seem harsh but i looked at keep my boob and maybe have things pop up after or have it removed and live. there was no option for me they can have them both as long as i have my life. I know not everyone is as strong willed as that but u will find ur inner strength.
There are some amazing ladies on here so always come back no one will think of u moaning as we all have our moan now and again
Good luck and take care
Lisa xx

7

Michelle

It is such a hard and difficult time as all the ladies above have pointed out but you will find the strength and come through it. I was diagnosed in April 08 at 27 years old and i have a 5 year old daughter. I was told i had to have a mastectomy and to be honest i ran out of the hospital when i heard this and the nurses were chasing after me! Personally i think that time of diagnosis is the hardest especially as you’re learning about things that you wish you didn’t have to know about. I personally think you should opt straight for the mastectomy and get it removed, facing the loss of your breast is so difficult but its such small price to pay for your life, thats how i looked at it and whenever i looked at my daughter i knew it was right.

It is tough going through all this and all the chemo when you have children but to be honest i know my daughter has pulled me through this because i’ve kept everything as normal as possible as i wanted to keep change as limited as possible for her.

You will meet some amazing people on your journey, i have made some really good friends. I’m about to finish my chemo now and to start my radiotherapy, it felt like such a long journey at the beginning but it does go so quick.

My thoughts are with you at such a horrible time for you and your family and i think you are so brave for coming on this website and reaching out to people, i’ve only just joined it as i couldn’t even talk about it when i got diagnosed so i think you’re showing a lot of strength already :slight_smile:

Helen x x x

8

Hi Michelle,
Sorry to hear of your diagnosis.
I was older than you when diagnosed [43] but, can appreciate everything you are feeling and going through.
Re having chemo before mastectomy/lumpectomy, I understand how you are thinking… ie.,.if theres cancer cells floating around anywhere else you want them treated asap…you could try asking your consultant or breast care nurse how much difference they feel it would make in YOUR case ifyou had chemo after surgery…obviously it will mean a mastectomy instead of lumpectomy…but there is a chance [sorry if this sounds blunt] that even if you have chemo before surgery the tumour may not shrink enough and you still have to have a mastectomy.
I would recommend talking to someone asap or ringing the nurse on this site.

Take care
There are alot of young women on this forum who will give you lots of support.

Karen x

9

Hi Michelle

I am really sorry to hear about your diagnosis, I was 32 diagnosed in June 2006. I hope you get the answers you are looking for. I think every case is different, speak to your BC nurse. I wish you all the best and take everyday as it comes. My son was 3 when this all kicked off and to be honest, he was my ‘rock’, I challenge this everyday for him. Stay strong.

Lots of love

Claire xx

10

I had no choice but to get chemo first, my cancer is too big at moment to operate on, the good thing is each time i have chemo I can feel see how much my breast has shrunk, you will get through this although we have a long road ahead of us, everycase IS different but you will have loads support on this site,

Good luck

Sharon x

11

Hi Michelle,
I am thinking of you. Like Sharon, I had no choice but to have chemo first and it worked really well for me. My tumour shrunk to almost nothing. The good thing about having chemo before surgery is that you can see the chemo working. However my first instinct when I was diagnosed was that I wanted surgery immediately - it wasn’t until it was properly explained to me and I read more, that I realised I was doing the right thing.
I had just turned 30 when I was diagnosed a year ago and I have come through it and feel really good now. I am here for you if you need me and my love and best wishes to you xx

12

Hi Michelle,
Im 36 dx April 08, 1, 9 yr old and 1, 4 year old. Im am sorry you have had to join us here, BC is s**t S**t S**t, but this is the hand we have been delt. You will find the strength to fight this, you have to for your children as I and plenty of others here have done. I have found this site a lifeline, at first just reading and then as I came to terms with things posting to offer my support and comments. I have 2 x cancers grade 2 stage 2 and 1 area of DCIS, started on chemo, then mast, radio, ovary removal, Letrozel and now just stated Herceptin. I am HER2+ and ER+ 6/21 nodes affected.

I just wanted to say to you that I had chemo first (wasnt given an option, and I have to say I cant get my head around the fact that some doctors offer us ladies the choice of chemo before or after surgery??? Why why why do they do that? We are in shock and mostly dont know much about BC at the begining, how can we make that sort of decision when our lives are in turmoil? They are the experts and we are in there hands and in my opinion should use their experience as a specialist doc/consultant to make/guide us to a treatment plan which gives us the best chance) Sorry went off on a bit of a ramble there!

Anyway having chemo first I would just like to point out that while you still have the cancer inside you when on chemo, there is something to measure against. After 2 x chemos my combined areas to cancer had reduced by 2 thirds, a bit more after the next 2, then I changed chemos and after the next 2 was re-scanned to find that this chemo was not working for me and therefore taken off chemo and straight into surgery. I was very upset about this at the time but now reolise that if I had had the mx first followed by chemo then I would have had to have x4 of the second lot for it not to work, as there would have been nothing to monitor against. Also dont forget that if you do have any stray cell lurking around the chemo would mop them up.

I aways knew that it would be a mx after chemo because of multiple areas involved.

Not looking to influence your decision by any means, but just wanted to share my story with you.

Nothing to offer about the post natal depression, only that I did find having chemo affected my mental state, but who knows if it was the chemo and not just the pressure of being a mum to 2 young kids and having BC? I have since been put on mild anti-depressants to combat the mood swings of the ‘change’ after having ovaries out, and they are helping me.

Good luck with your decision. I will check this thread from time to time to see how you are doing, please post to let us all know. We will be routing for you.

xxx

13

Hi
And thank you to all you who have offer kind words of support & wisdom. I talked it over with my mum and boyfriend and decided to go for chemo first (fingers crossed i made the right choice) and am 9 days past my first course of EC. I had a horrible reaction to the intraveinois steroids but apart from that it wasnt as bad as i thought. Now however I think it is hittingme. I had to go into hospital yesterday as I now have a water infection and my whiteblood count is <5 si that explains why I couldnt get up the stairs yesterday. Other half has insisted on wheeling me to and from the bathroom on the computer chair (he is a bit mad) which is making me gigle a bit. Im expecting to feel worse before better but am staying positive. Thanks again.

14

Hi Michelle,
Just read your thread and wanted to say hello. I was diagnosed at 27 in November 2007 and lets just say 2008 was a hard year but I got through it! Like you I decided on the option of chemo first and that was the best move as that managed to shrink my tumour enough that the surgeon was able to keep my skin and nipple when they removed the tumour. I then at the same time had a reconstruction as that was the best way for me to deal with the situation.

Anyway good luck with the chemo- you will get through it!!!

Lisa

15

Hi to all :slight_smile:

I’m a newbie on here and although I dont have BC (am i gate crashing?) I am newly diagnosed BRACA1, with a horrendous family history of BC. I’m 40, have teenagers from first marriage, and two baby girls almost 1 and 2 with my wonderful husband of 3 yrs. I was diagnosed with BRACA1 on Friday, and have gone into shock. I went into the screening knowing that if the mutation was present I would have ovaries/breasts removed. This is still the plan, asap.It has taken me 10 yrs to pluck up the courage to find out if I had the gene. I lived with the insight I should be Cancer aware but still had the wee bit of hope that I may not have the mutation. However as time went on I felt more of a need to know for sure. I felt compelled to post on this thread because you are all an absolute inspiration and you have helped me gather my fuzzy thoughts and get myself back into gear. Best wishes to you all, xxx