Diagnosed late last week. It’s still sinking in DCIS and invasive DC 
I’m trying to make myself better informed for the situation to come, and to get to grips with all the jargon about HER2+/-, ER+/- etc. So I can make sense of what the doctors tell me.
On a waiting list for surgery (which I find somewhat reassuring, as hopefully it means I’m not urgent-urgent).
It still doesn’t stop it being a total shock diagnosis, though.
Hi Contrarymary,
Welcome to the Breast Cancer Care discussion forums, you’ve come to the right place for support.
I have put for you below the link to BCC’s publication on DCIS which you may find useful to read. Hope it helps.
DCIS: breastcancercare.org.uk/server/show/nav.718/changeTemplate/PublicationDisplay/publicationId/71
Kind regards,
Jo, Facilitator
Hi Contrarymary,
sorry you have had to join us on here, it takes a while to sink in, i was dx 3rd March and it still hasn’t and still learning jargon and terms. this site is great for chatting and making friends in the same situation, it has really helped me!
love debs xxxx
Hello Contrarymary - sorry that you have had the bad news we all don’t want to hear…
As debs just said you will find lots of support here over the weeks and months ahead and just ask any questions on anything you are unsure about…
hugs Theresa
I’m so sorry about your diagnosis. I think all of us here know too well that terrible feeling of helplessness and confusion and bewilderment when you first hear that you have breast cancer. Once I had actually embarked on treatment and had a clear plan of action I felt better. It is a massive shock to the system - and a year on from diagnosis I still can’t quite believe it has happened. I am sure you will find lots of support here.
Best of luck with everything.
Hello Mary, yes - sorry you find yourself here but we’ve all found enormous help, advice, and friends through landing here so feel free to ask, there’s always someone who knows. The waiting is a pain isn’t it, everyone’s different but I didn’t read too much in depth until I’d got my full diagnosis as I found it wass easy to read my symptoms into anything! Di x
Hi
Sorry to hear of your recent diagnosis. Feeling ‘at sea’ is an approrpiate way to describe those initial few weeks. I know it is easy to say but it does begin to get a little easier once it has all sunk in. Even after that there are good days and bad days.
I was diagnosed with DCIS over a month ago now. I’ve foind this website brilliant and have met so many with wise words of wisdom, who are going through similar things,
TAke care
Keep posting, there’s always someone here for you,
Love Freddie xxxxxxxxxxxx
Hi Mary,
The speed of it all makes your head spin,and I still feel it’s a bit surreal and actually must be happening to someone else…however, I was diagnosed Jan , Op Feb and am “lucky” that am straight into radiotherapy and tamoxifen. Just remember that whatever question or worry you have you will always find someone on here to help you,don’t ever think that you have to go through this on your own. Good luck and keep chatting.
Sandra x
hi contrarymary, the shock is awful and takes a good while to wear off I found but keep talking here, hopefully when you have surgery and get your head round what needs doing it will settle, mary x
Thank you all for your kind words.
I’m trying to take it in ‘easy stages’ - just sent off for Val Sampson’s book, as I’ve seen it recommended in BCC and other literature I’ve read.
I’m also trying to ask all the questions I was too dazed to ask when I was given my diagnosis. I’m sure it’s going to be a drip-feed process.
Should be getting a surgery date for 4-5 weeks time, and have asked to see the doc before I get operated on, as I’ve not seen the doctor but only the breast care nurses for, and since, diagnosis.
I’m interested in any tips and advice anyone can give to prepare for surgery, as I’ve never had major surgery in my life and don’t know what to expect, or what I might be able to do to make it less traumatic on body and mind.
I am surprised you have only encountered BCNs so far. I would absolutely insist on meeting the surgeon before the op - and not just a quick 3 mins before she or he scrubs up either - you want some proper consultation time.
You don’t say what kind of surgery you are having. Is it mastectomy or lumpectomy? I have had both and recovery both times was very fast. I was amazed at how quickly I was back in business after the mastectomy.
The worst thing about being in hospital (in my opinion) is having to listen to other people’s inane chatter and their bl**dy televisions. I download lots of podcasts from BBC onto my MP3 along with all my favourite music and just zone out. They don’t keep you in for long these days. After the mastectomy I was out the following day.
I should think the next few weeks are going to drag for you and getting through this period of time might prove to be tricky. I found comfort - and still do - from educating myself as much as possible about this disease. I threw myself into it like a project. It’s not everyone’s way of coping but it works for me.
Good luck.
Hi
Just read your post and you sound really frightened which has prompted me to try to help in some way if I can. Having had 4 major operations (including brain surgery) before I joined this club in Feb - have had lump and nodes removed followed by 2nd op to remove all nodes - now waiting chemo and radiotherapy - I can only tell you how I coped. Arm yourself with as much info as you feel happy with - some people want the details - some the basics (have a pad handy to write down questions to ask). I found I was much more scared of the general anaesthetic than I was of the surgery. I am a great believer in fate and if I am meant to get through this I will but I am still going to give fate one hell of a helping hand - I tried to get as fit and healthy before the surgery - try to stay positive - not easy cos the waiting for ops/ results/appointments will drive you NUTS! And most of all I told all my friends and family exactly what was going on and encouraged them all to talk to me openly about any aspect - as well as talk to people who are going through the same thing. It will make you realise you are not alone and that the feelings you have are quite natural. You will have lotsa happy days but days when you want to cry, scream, throw things at the cat etc - we all do it.
I am really sorry you have had to join us but you are in the best place possible - you can get all kinds of info and tips - and lots of love and support. Take care, big hug Estellex
Thanks for that msmolly. I absolutely intend to see the surgeon before he/she operates (it will be one of 3 consultants at the hospital). I’m having a wide local excision and sentinel node biopsy. Bit concerned as it’s left breast and I’m left-handed, so I think I’ll be more than usually cack-handed for a while!
I’ve been told I’ll be in overnight 1-2 days, I’m keeping my fingers crossed for just the one.
I’m clueless about mp3 players, so that won’t be an option for me. I’ll probably stick to books. Might need earplugs for the telly though.
I’ve got some stuff organised, and seeing oncologist next week. Feel I need to get some idea of what I want to ask surgeon before requesting appt to see him/her so as to get best value from the time.
estelle - I’m a bit of a couch potato at present, and I don’t think I’ve got time to turn into a super-fit person, but planning to get in some walking at least, so I’m hoping that helps.
It’s humbling to see what everyone else is going through, and yet being generous enough to offer words of welcome and support for newbies - thank you all so much!
Hi mary - look your user name - I’m a mary too and in fact on the owners site that me and a friend run (trailer tent, exciting stuff!) my name is marymary! Keep talking and asking about things…have you kids, family? mary x
Hi Mary, I had same op as you but on right boob and am right handed, Apart from having my girls I hadn’t been about hospitals much so it was all new to me and I am a big wuss !
I was in for four days as my surgeon didn’t like to send his ladies out with their drains still in. Button down front p.j’s are the best thing to wear, wet wipes are handy as couldn’t have a shower and easy to freshen up with, boiled sweets to suck post op as throat a bit sore from anaesthetic,got told to take on plenty fluid before op and after op and try and eat well,took some dried fruit in for after to get things moving in that department. I just wasn’t prepared for how shattered I would be after,so listen to your body and take it easy but do make sure you do your arm exercises…oh and if you are having SNB with the blue dye watch out for the blue pee after !!!
Hope this helps,good luck.
Sandra x
Thanks for the tips, Sandra.
It’s so great to feel not alone with this diagnosis!
I’m single - no partner or kids, family live in the north, and I’m in London, so not going to be easy. As a result I’ve made sure all my friends know my diagnosis. I suppose some will run a mile, but if that’s the case, it’s better I know now.
Will be being treated at Charing Cross. I believe I’m going to be in good hands based on my experience so far (apart from not seeing the doc to get my diagnosis). I’ve asked to see the doc before I do have surgery - and not a 2 minute meet and greet before I go under anasthetic!
Am joining a stage 2 trial (subject to tests) pre-surgery. Could be grim, but at least I feel I’ll be doing something and not just waiting.
I’m wondering if I could be able to use deodorant after surgery - I’ve got one of those mineral stone jobbies (not tried it yet, though).
Also wondering how disruptive this is all going to be for my life - I’m currently assuming all bets are off!
I’m 18 months in, and was in a very similar position in being single and living in London. When I look back, the most heartwarming thing of the whole scenario has been realising how stalwart my friends were - and how much they wanted to help. And I’m afraid I found a cancer diagnosis a wonderful excuse to get rid of a few people from my life. My treatment has been great - I like and respect all the people who are treating me. I nearly always took a friend (and sometimes a relative) to the early appointments with me, for I found it really helpful to be able to talk things through with someone afterwards. They’d often remember things I forgot or remind me to ask certain questions. I’d never been ill before and so found the whole process very strange at times.
I’d echo everyone else’s comments about the pre-surgery time being the worst. I’m a light sleeper so found ear-plugs invaluable when I was in hospital. Don’t forget your mobile phone charger either - friends regularly cycled in with salads and fruit when I texted them(I was in for four days). Good luck…
I’m not sleeping well while I wait for things to start to swing into action - is that a common experience.
I didn’t ask about it, as I’m a fairly light sleeper anyway. I’ve been using lavender oil on my pillow to try to relax me into sleep, and it gets me off, but I’m waking ridiculously early and can’t get back to sleep for the thoughts whizzing round my head.
Did wonder about going to my GP for something, but I’m reluctant to go to the surgery and perhaps pick up someone else’s lurgy - don’t want anything to delay any part of my treatment!
Bro asked if I wanted to go up there - but it’s a 300 mile drive (cheapest way to go if you get as violently travel-sick as I do), and with the sleep I don’t think I dare. Short distances seem ok but any more and I think it wouldn’t be so safe.
One of my friends who has been treated for cervical cancer said I should try to get good sleep in, if I can. Not much hope of that, seemingly!
I also seem to have entered a bit of a weepy phase. Why it has to be the kindness and thoughtfulness of others that sets me off, I don’t know. Mind it was ever thus!
Hi ContraryMary,
Greetings from West London. I had my mastectomy last August, I did not sleep during the 2 weeks from diagnosis to surgery, but all my ironing was sorted, cupboards cleaned etc!! Rescue remedy helped calm my active brain and let me get a few hours.
I am surprised you have not seen the surgeon, I have seen mine every visit, so ask for a consultation.
I was in for 5 days, because of the drains. So as Poodle and the others say take a good book, mobile phone and treats.
Good luck
Kat x
I was terribly weepy in the post-diagnosis, pre-operation bit and had terrible 3ams. As a friend said to me (over a bottle of wine), fear plus imagination never takes you to a good place. I was also worried about a delay (also about four weeks) before my operation (although in part down to me because I refused to have one particular surgeon - the BCN is the person to sort that one out if you want to change surgeons) but the surgeon I liked and wanted to have said a delay of up to six months would have given me exactly the same outcome. A month was quite long enough - the thought that my body was nurturing something malignant was very hard to come to terms with and I was very relieved after the operation.
At this point, I think you have licence to do anything you want to - go shopping (always a theraputic activity for me), get to grips with mp3 players (and download podcasts you might want to listen to when recuperating) or just weep in wine bars with friends (I did a lot of that too) but I have to say I think you sound very sorted. And if you want proof that life continues after cancer, I won’t be on the forum for a while (although do please PM if there’s anything I can help with) since I’ve got to go to the US for work this weekend. Hope you manage to have an ok weekend…