Hi
am due to get wed in july, despite just being diagnosed with mroe secondaries to liver and spine (already have dx in both lungs)(waiting to find out treatment) but i am about to send out invites but not sure about the wedding list - there are a few household things that be useful but since my dx i really am unenthused about anythin to do with the house now, and i really just want money instead for a honeymoon as we dont have a lot of money and that would be fantastic so we could spend time together, but not sure how to put this in the invite - as dont want to ask for money! any ideas? i have given out the family invites and just said id like money but what about friends and friends of my husband to be who i dont know so well???
ps. hope this post doesnt show twice i submitted it but it didnt show up! think going mad!
You know what I think you are brilliant planning your wedding. I was diagnosed with secondary on spine in early Feb and can hardly even bring myslef to buy a new cushion!!
I’m sure if you let it be known that you have a special location in mind to visit your guests will happily give money, if anything it saves them having to buy a useless gift.
good luck with your plans.
Muddy (age 38 feeling like 78)
Hi Zippy
Good Luck with your wedding plans, enjoy every moment.
I’m sure that anyone who is aware of your curcumstance would understand you asking for a contribution towards your honeymoon, maybe don’t even use the word money. My nephew did the same thing last year and he had no reason whatsoever other than they had already set up home together but had not had a decent holiday.
Love Andie
Hi Zippy, congratulations on your upcoming wedding. Lots of people these days don’t have gifts and it really does make it easier for the guests, too. Just mention you both would like a honeymoon somewhere special and I’m sure all your guests will be delighted. My friend has just invited me to her daughter’s wedding and they wrote a little poem inside the invite asking for help with the cost of a honeymoon. Most people are in that boat if they already live together, just go for it, and loads of luck to you. love Pat x
Hi Zippy,
My niece asked for money for thier honeymoon for a wedding present. When they got back they sent a lovely thank you card with a picture of them in the sunset on honeymoon. It was really nice.
Just go for it and ask for money, no one is going to be offended.
Best wishes to you and future hubby.
marg xxxx
Hi Zippy
I run a handmade wedding stationery business in my spare time and have done quite a few with requests for money in with the invitations. They mostly use a variation of the following poems.
Its quite easy to adapt and doesnt seem to offend anyone.
To you our friends and soon to be in laws
we would like to make a small request.
As we soon hope to travel to far away shores
a wedding gift list would not be the best.
We would never presume and hope not to offend
but if bringing a gift a little money would help us on our way
More importantly though we hope you will attend
and help us to celebrate on our Wedding Day.
or
On this our special Wedding Day
we would just like to say,
we have a house and contents too
so presents would not really do.
But if a gift you’d like to bring
a little money would be the thing.
We hope this will not cause offence
but in our case it makes more sense.
Most importantly we request
that you turn up as our wedding guest.
Hope all goes well and have a lovely day. S x
I have been to two asian weddings where people simply ask for cash, and a third where they asked for a contribution to their house renovation. Absolutely no problem to anyone …its alll about what is right for the couple, and you dont want things, you want happy memories of a lovely holiday.
You could slip a note in with the invitation saying something like that, if you still feel sensitive maybe you could find a holiday firm that does vouchers which people could club to but - but I wouldn’t really worry at all,
Hope you have a great day.
Cathyx
Hi … think its great that you are planning for your wedding - congratulations!
We had a similar quandry when we got married 4 years ago - it was a second marriage for both of us and with 2 lots of household stuff between us it didnt make sense to get more! We also wanted to try and have a nice honeymoon instead … so when we did our wedding"list" we did have some small items on there but the main one was Vouchers for a particular travel company - and then we topped up the vouchers we received with some of our own money and booked the trip!
No one was offended (well they never said they were anyway - and we did get lots of vouchers ranging from 10.00 pounds to 100.00 pounds!)
Sue xxx
Hi there,
I also think it is great that you are planning your wedding. Surely no one will take offence if you suggest money instead of a pressie? Custard’s poems are rather a good idea - amazing what knowelegde/advice one can get on the BCC web site. Go for it and have a great day!
cheers
caroline
My son had a wedding list sent up with a travel co. (trailfinders) who send out printed cards to put in with wedding invites and had a lovely honeymoon travelling in the USA and another relations daughter wrote a poem asking people, only if they wished to, to donate towards a new kitchen in their flat. I think today as most couples have usually already set home it is quite acceptable to ask for money towards what you want. I for one would be more then happy knowing my money is going towards what the couple really want.
If anyone feels offended perhaps you could suggest they give a donation to a charity of their choice.
Good luck hope all goes well and enjoy your day.
Maggie.x.
Hi
thank you all for your replies - really helpful thank you!
decided to just write this
Gift list:
We have not put a list together as we are happy just for you to join us on our special day and having lived together we have most household items, however, we are planning a 2 week surprise honeymoon (it’s a surprise, as we don’t even know where we are heading!) and we would love to receive something towards it
to make it extra special for us. Thank you!
We look forward to seeing you on our wedding day!
We can’t wait!
noone has come back and said it was awful and evryone seems ok about it! thankfully - it did cause me a lot of stress but glad to have got hte invites out! even my dad approved! so it cant be that bad!! lol!!
thank you all tho your replies were so helpful in makin my decision - now to arrange a ‘post box’ i think at the reception someone mentioned i think its a good idea, in particular as one of my partners long term friends is a bit of a liability and i am paranoid as it is he will walk of with all the house silver!! but what do you do not invite him? argh the next thing to stress about…
xxx