Hi everyone. Hope you all had an ok weekend. Anyone in Yorkshire must be having an amazing but logistically challenging time.
I had my penultimate Tax on Tuesday. I thought I would feel very ‘up’ about being so near the end, but actually feeling rather grumpy for no particular reason other than I think I have just had enough of my life being on hold. I shouldn’t complain because I have had my surgery, so I really am close to the end, other than a year of herceptin and many years of tamoxifen.
Feeling a bit guilty for nagging my 13 year old son all weekend, especially as he was the star of the show in the school play last week. I felt so proud of him, as all the parents kept telling me how great he was. Term is nearly over now, prize giving on Thursday, so we will see what that brings!
Ironically my side effects have not been too bad. The gradual reduction of the steroid dose over a few days seems to have helped. Just feeling tired, useless, funny mouth/sinuses and a bit achy. Hoping to pick up tomorrow.
Wishing you all well. Hope everyone has a good nights sleep now it is a little cooler and hoping all goes well for Rosie tomorrow.
Hi ladies and thanks to all for your reassurance re radiotherapy. I believe that the biggest help to fight this horrible disease other than the medical stuff is a positive mental attitude it really gets you down when you meet people who get some strange pleasure from passing on their horror story. Its like when u r pregnant and people regale you with their labour horror story. I too find it hard to concentrate and keep starting things that I don’t finish.
Enjoy all the breaks you can doing lovely things with family and friends. Me and the moody teenagers are playing can roulette for tea tomorrow night. Get your canned food out take all labels off everyone chooses a can whatever the combo that’s tea. We have had some true heinous meals but great fun x
Hi everyone, Nellie at least you had a reasonable sleep!! Yes emotional issues seem to be looming regularly now! For me it’s coming up to the last chemo and everyone expecting me to be thrilled- but just feel flat.
Louise, I hate cooking cooking dinners so think I might steal your idea with canning!
Jos, hope chemo today is I eventful and side effects not too bad for you?
Tij, you must be very proud of your son, he sounds very talented.
Jackie, Wildpurl, Joan, Eam, cassie,rolicarpit hope all is well.
Rosie, hope you had a lovely weekend and feel ready to face this week, will be thinking of you! Xx
Hi his, certainly sounds like mine!
Nellie like u I am at the mercy of my daughter 17 and son who has mental health issues of 19. They do forget how ill we have been and seem to think that cancer is something we can turn on and off. It is not unreasonable to expect some help. My kids have to make own sandwiches and clean own rooms albeit badly.They have done for the passed 2 years Once a week they have to make their own tea.This is what I had to do when I was their age. To get your own back ay can roulette you really have not lived till you see the face of a sulky 17 year old girl faced with a tea of dinner ham peaches and rice pudding Tee hee xx
Jos and Rosie, hope all goes well with the chemo. Tij, sorry you are feeling a bit anyhow. I think we are all getting fed up. When I saw the district nurse on Friday she said ’ you don’t seem to have your usual ‘vim’ . Precisely so. Usually when people ask how I am I tend to put a positive spin on it. I find it much harder to do that now. I hope the side effects are not too awful.
Cassie, hope the consultant manages to sort out the steroid issue. Presumably it is the increased dose that is doing it. Is your chemo tomorrow?
Nellie, wildpurl, glad you managed a reasonable nights sleep. It makes such a difference.
Lovewine, how great to see your chemo staff in the Race for life and what a lovely dedication. And your family too. So supportive.
Spent a lovely afternoon with the grandchildren and my daughter painted my nails since I had to miss my salon appt because of the unanticipated trip to the hospital on Saturday. Had MRI this morning. Much less comfortable and claustrophobic than last time, a newer machine with a hole for your head, like a massage table. I was told that the results would be sent to the oncologist today so should know the score when I see him on Tbursday. The appointment was in a posh new hospital building which is uncannily like an airport terminal. There are patient check in screens, then you are directed to a particular gate and have to watch for your name to come up on a screen. Costa coffee bars, with the usual enormous queue. All very familiar. Unfortunately no duty free.
In terms of side effects have numb fingers and soles of feet and foul taste in mouth but sense of taste seems to be returning. Hooray. Off to my half day at the cancer support centre tomorrow so hopefully will be able to enjoy their lovely salads and not have to sneak off for a surreptitious bar of less than 70 per cent cocoa chocolate.
Evening ladies,well i feel completely back to normal now (day 11) apart from a sore nose (it was really dry & sore this round & had a few nose bleeds). So actually enjoyed the little things in life - nice cuppa & a cake!
Wildpurl your village rock festival sounds like fun for next wkend - great thing to look forward to! Hope work is going well. I to will be making the most of this ‘up’ week - have something planned for every day & may even have a take away one night just because i will enjoy it compared to last week!
Sounds like youre race for life was lovely too lovewine - of course you will do it next year - no doubt about it! Yeah the fatigue is unbelievable the first few days - could quite easily hibernate!
So glad you are feeling good after youre ‘down’ weekend jos. We all get these moments - not nice at all. Hope tax going well so far. Also interesting to hear what you have read with not much difference between lumpectomy & rads v’s masectomy also. Both you & lovewine have put my mind at rest more.
I was a bit grumpy this time too tlj63! I kept thinking the se’s where lasting forever but when i looked back in my notes from last tax it was the same timescale & the pains where only niggly not full on like last time! My husband said im just getting impatient with myself coz so close now!
Totally relate & agree with your post louise 3721!!
Im not sure if the sweats are steroids,chemo,zoladex or a mixture of all nellie 2099! But do wake up absolutely drenched at times - lovely! I had emotional mood issues on fec more than tax. Jekkle & hyde!!
Hope youre feeling ok now cassie86? Hope youre appointment & bloods all good to go! Mine where down to 96 last time & aneamic so praying they pick up for last round!
Hope you enjoy youre support centre tomorrow joan47. There doesnt seem anything like that around here. Just a little group a couple of girls have set up once a month which is nice.
Haha youre can roulette sounds a laugh louise!! We kind of had that tonight but with frozen meals - when i make a big bolognese etc i put the rest in individual tubs with labels on but with hubby helping out & me not on the ball…there are lots of tubs with no labels on! But we didnt do to bad - ended up with a couple tubs of chilli & a bolognese de frosted!
Youre last one today rosie??!!:)
Xxxx
Hi everyone, I too feel back to normal today! Even worked for most of the day almost as well as pre illness!!
I too wake up soaked and not sure what caused it, but it is very unpleasant and disrupts sleep.
Joan, your cancer support centre sounds really good, we haven’t anything like that here either, I am going on the look good course in two weeks, not sure if ime looking forward to it ! How nice to have time with your daughter and grandchildren, I am so looking forward to being a grandma but no sign yet! And yes it was lovely to have such support on race for life, it’s also shocking how many people are affected by cancer when you go to these kind of events.
Eam, good on you having things planned for this week- you can almost forget we are ill during the good week!! So make the most of it and enjoy it!???
Louise, teenagers can be very challenging at best of times, my youngest son is 23 and lives at home at the moment , but is moving out soon, I do think at times he can be very selfish, but then at others very thoughtful, but I think my tolerance levels are not great surprisingly at the moment! Sounds like you have your teenagers worked out though!!
Cassie, hope everything went ok at hospital.
Take care everyone and hopefully a restful evening and a good nights sleep??
Evening Wildpurl. It’s in my mind Rosie had last chemo today, I think on way home from kyrenia! And surgery in a few days, all the very best to you rosie x
Rosie, sorry to hear you had the allergic reaction again; did they give you hydrocortisone and antihistamine or whatever other meds they used to stop the reaction in advance as well as the steroids. I was told they would do that with me next time. I hope the side effects are not too bad/don’t go on too long; it’s so tough to have to face the operation before you have properly pulled out of the chemo tunnel. But it sounds very sensible that the op has been postponed for a few days at least, especially since it is now going to be a double. What a decision to have to take but you seem to have had good advice. I’m glad that the news about your husband was good, but really you could have done without this additional anxiety. I assume you have already bought your outfit for your sons wedding. Will it need any adjustment? I know you have avery clever dressmaker you can call on if need be. Glad you had a lovely weekend away even if inevitably overshadowed by anxiety.
Jos, glad the chemo went well. Lovewine and EAM, great you are feeling better.
One of the worst things about chemo for me has been the foul taste in the mouth, feeling thirsty but not fancying a thing to drink. A few weeks ago I bought some watermelon slices, not normally my favourite fruit. It’s been brilliant and I can just about detect some flavour. So I now take slices to bed with me to chomp on in the night; take them out with me - sat munching them in the hospital waiting area yesterday- and keep a box of slices in the fridge. Of course I will probably never be able to face it again after this.
Hi Joan47, EAM28, Wildpurl, Nelli and Rosie and lovewine,
I had an eventful day yesterday to say the least after being as sick as a dog (not sure why that expression is used) after the dredded 4 steroids at 8am (I had eaten breakfast first) I phoned the chemo dept to see if they had any advice they just said go ahead with the 12noon tablets as usual and hope for the best (they sayed down thankfully.) 1.40 appt with the consultant slid to 3.00ish I was then seen by an unknown doctor and a pharmacist who seemed far more knowledgable even to the extent of helping the doctor to fill in the follow up appt form lol, bless. I then had to wait until the whole story of my admission (I had by luck brought the discharge letter it had not found its way to my notes yet) the recent sided effects were then relayed to my original consultant! I just about made it at 3.45 to the bloods dept and was releaved to see it was empty, was invited into the room, you should have seen the poor guys face, I could have been speaking in another language, he started looking at the arm without the PICC line in and asking about my veins, I explained that that is the whole point of having a PICC line you put treatment in and take blood out, he eventually said come with me please I will speak to a collegue, his collegue informed me that they could not take bloods from a PICC line because of hygine issues and that I needed to speak to the chemo dept about it. (They were not happy about seeing me it was obvious so late in the day) We waited for about an hour but it was straight forward in the end both the lines are working OK.)
We then went off for lunch at 5.20, its a wonder I had not fainted since the bit of toast I managed to force in for the 12 noon steroids.
Rosie sorry about DH’s melanoma diagnosis, I hope his sore arm recovers soon, I am sure they can find a nice waterproof cover for it, I don’t mean to sound mean. I have had a wide excision on my upper arm about three years ago lucky for me it was clear nothing malignant but I still had a nice crater in my arm for several months which has filled in nicely now with new fat I guess. You will both have to look after each other or as you say the dog will have a new job! Glad you both had a nice break and good luck with your forthcoming surgery. X Cassie
I have another radiotherapy planning meeting booked for the same day as my next consultant & bloods appointment 28th July, lets hope it all goes smoothly, better than yesterdays performance as I will have to travel from north to central London to UCLH, they only wanted to book it for 6 days after the last chemo again the appointment was offered by telephone this time and I explained that I would likely feel to wobbly to be traveling around too much at that stage, so they agreed to change the appointment to the day before the last session, its still not ideal but I have got to the stage where I really do not want to delay anything the sooner the treatment if finished and PICC line is out the better. I am sure we all feel the same, I have my eldest daughter down in London this weekend, both daughters will be off looking for bridesmaid dresses, I won’t be joining them this time, it will be too soon after my treatment . Lovely to have nice things to look forward to though.
Keep well ladies
Hi everyone, Rosie, lovely to hear from you, sorry to hear D/H has to have another procedure today, hope he recovers well, good luck to you with side effects too hope they are minimal, what a time you are both having, just keep your sons wedding in the forefront of your mind as ime sure you are, what a lovely occasion it will be??you must feel easier too in your decision for a double mastectomy, I have a couple of friends who had this op several years ago and both recovered well and in a matter of days felt very good, I think too the pain afterwards is very minumal and neither had to even take paracetamol after a couple of days!!
Good luck today everyone having procedures or challenges!!
Hi Rosie thankyou we will be in the positive corner should any one want us!
Afternoon all,am slightly miffed - still waiting for district nurse to come & flush line!! Im bored & little girl fed up of being in all morning & tired. Was suppose to be meeting friends with their children & going to the supermarket but looks like that has all gone out the window! Oh well only one more flush & bloods after today so trying not to get too up tight about it!
Yes lovewine its funny how when you are well you wouldnt think anything was really goiung on! Its my best friends hen weekend away in bristol this wkend & they are all trying to persuade me to go as im so well but dont want to push my luck & have any set backs now!
Yep no more bad weeks for us soon wildpurl - i am so holding onto that thought! Anything else in life will be a breeze after this!
Rosie so glad you had a lovely time away & managed to sleep well for a change! Congratulations on your FINAL CHEMO!! Can you actually believe that day has been & gone after all this time??! & what a time youve had of it too! Im sure you will be fine for youre surgery - will just have to be patient with your self. Still a bit more journey to go i know but we will be here right with you all the way.X
Yay just one more to go for you too jos!! Great to be able to say that isnt it! Hope the side effects arnt too harsh for you. Same to you nellie 2099 - unbelievable how tired you feel isnt it!
Worst thing for me too joan47 - i shall have to give the watermelon a go for last round.
What an awful day for you cassie86! Shocking!! Hope your daughters look after you this wkend.
When are you scheduled for surgery jackie09?
Whoop whoop rolicarpit youre all done & dusted too!! have you got rads next? Hope you have a nice afternoon at school.
Xxx
She didnt come untill nearly 3pm rosie & by that time my little girl had crashed out on her bean bag in the living room bless her! The plan was for her to have her nap after dinner like normal but in the car on the way to meet friends - had to let them down in the end - probably wont see them untill xmas now. But made the most of the rest of the day & went on a long muddy walk!
Hope youre feeling ok? I know tax takes a few days to kick in but you hadnt really had time to get over the last one had you?!
DIY’ing my friends hen out fit tonight with a couple friends so she will have a nice surprise at the wkend! Think a glass of wine is a must to help with inspiration!:)
Xxx
Eam, how annoying having to wait all that time, but at least you had a nice, long walk! I think it would be very good for you to go on the hen night! As long as you were sensible it would be fine, enjoy your glass of wine whilst being creative tonight, I am going to have a glass of red wine myself in a minute???!
Rosie, hope D/H is recovering well, hope the paper plates are being used, you don’t want it be washing up this week! How awful you were given antibiotics and dismissed like that, your blood runs cold when think of consequences if you hadn’t have seen another consultant, definitely a complaint in order when you are stronger.
Everyone seems to be coping fairly ok this week ,apart from cassie and your hospital palaver. Nellie it must be reassuring to have medical back up in the family, especially to check you are on right track!
Had sad news today, my lovely sister and her husband who have been such a support to me are up in Scotland sightseeing for this week have had to have their beloved dog put to sleep today, a decision which had to be made and carried out by my elderly parents on their behalf, those of you who have/had dogs know how much a part of the family they are and how sad it is when they die, I get such a lot of pleasure from my 2 collies, especially as I too spend a lot of time on my own whilst O/H at work, so whole family feeling rather flat this evening.
Hope you all manage some sleep tonight!
Good news Rosie Dh cured! What sweet words to hear! And why do men use so many pots and pans! My husband just the same, he also never wipes down the work surfaces! At least paper plates tomorrow!
And yes losing a pet is like a family member, feel very sorry too for my elderly parents having to take her to the vet and be there whilst put to sleep.
Well girls, I have come out of my grump. The only thing that is bugging me at the moment is acid reflux, so can’t really complain. As long as I avoid acidic foods and use gaviscon it’s manageable.
My husband is the same as yours in the kitchen Rosie. He loves to cook, but it would never occur to him to wipe down the surfaces. I really admire the way you have managed your chemo every 2 weeks. I don’t think I would have coped without that 3rd week of feeling vaguely normal. I think you should be fine 2 weeks post op at your son’s wedding. I managed a flight at that point for my mum’s 80th. You might not be the life and soul of the party if it’s a long day but I’m sure you will manage to enjoy the day. Perhaps no wild dancing on tables, but definitely be able to participate in such a lovely occasion.
Top tip my husband came up with to avoid post op infections after the dressings have been removed was to use the hair dryer to dry yourself so you don’t have to touch the wound area with a towel. Also to avoid embarrassment whilst in the hospital it’s best to wear pyjamas with a button up front. The staff will be forever inspecting the wound, so it’s easier to undo PJs rather than lifting up a nightie. Also it’s easier to manage the drains with PJs.
Hope everyone else’s day went ok. We are so near the end we can almost touch it.
Positive of the day, I’ve got stubble in my eyebrows, how lucky am I?
Rosie and Nellie, a better nights sleep!! Yes men and cooking, my OH is a great cook , but very messy, I am very tidy but not a great cook, but then I don’t really enjoy it at all!! Nellie cocker spaniels are a lively breed like my boder collies - they need 2 walks a day and know the time and follow you everywhere until you give in and take them out!!
On the eyebrow issue, I have maybe a thin line still left, in the last couple of weeks my eyelashes have become little stumps!! But faint fuzz on head, everywhere else not growing!
Am going to work a few hours again today, so hopefully a productive day?
Rosie, hope side effects are kind, you really seem to be on a fast track now !! At least not much time to get anxious !!