does anyone else feel a bit p1ssed off when they see people without cancer making such bad lifestyle choices and not caring? You know, feel like saying “for goodness sake while you still have the chance change your diet and do more exercise and quit the ciggies and cut down the beer because you are a case of cancer/stroke/heart attack waiting to happen”?
obviously cancer does not discriminate as it often picks young children or people who have been really dedicated to their personal health and fitness all their lives, but there are plenty of things a person can do to their bodies to encourage it to pick them
I am not self-righteous or anything, I have had vices that may or may not have contributed to me developing BC and I knew the risks but having been diagnosed and treated I know it is so worthwhile adapting a few things to reduce risks in the future.
I know what you mean about people not adapting to healthy lifestyles. I studied health promotion at uni and there is a miriad of reasons why people don’t change behaviours. It does concern me especially those who smoke because there is absolutely no advantages to smoking at all. My son smokes and I hate it with a passion. He knows I do and I have tried everything to discourage him but nothing works. I just hope one days he comes to his senses. However, I am a hypocrite in the sense that I still drink and I know that it is a likely a contributing factor to breast cancer is some people so I should really give up completely, but know I won’t. I guess I have a very laid back approach to the causes of cancer because my son had cancer as a baby and no-one can offer us any reason why - just faulty genes but I make sure that he takes good care of himself now!
My son smokes - and I hate it. I hear him coughing sometimes and it breaks my heart.
My sister smokes - I hate that also.
Cancer has always been a fear of mine, and my diagnosis has shocked me.
I thought I was invincible! Im not - Im weak, and see a mental weakness in me that I never experienced before.
I used to smoke (a lot) but well and truly kicked that ages ago I would never go back to it now, as you say there are no advantages to it. I admit to loving the vino and I am NOT giving that up however I do take it steady now, little sips and I stop before I’ve overdone it. But the one that gets me the most is that my partner’s mum is morbidly obese and a big factor in that she can’t abide waste and can’t resist a “bargain” (eg buy one get one free at the frozen pizza section) even though money is not an issue, so she simply eats too much of the very wrong things. She does not seem to realise that being overweight is as bad as smoking when it comes to increasing the risks of Dread Diseases. But you cannot say anything to an overweight person it is seen as rudem insulting and interfering whereas it is open season to attack a smoker for the damage they are doing their health. A woman of 60 might not care about looking good in a miniskirt or a bikini but they SHOULD care about whether they are going to cut their life short, or even worse get ill enough not to have any quality of life and have to carry on for years requiring care that puts a strain on those who love them.
Lisa - I know what you mean about feeling “weak” but I choose to say mental tiredness rather than mental weakness, it is apparently comparable to “baby brain” I am reliably informed, and will go away when you’ve dealt with the treatments etc. I am trying to enjoy the dumbed down side of life for now :0)
I agree-. I have never smoked, rarely drink (in fact haven’t had any alcohol in about 9 years-went off it after chemo, and the taste for it never returned!).B.P. is good, am not overweight, have a healthy diet, and lifestyle-and yet, here I am. I do wonder what else, if anything, I could have done to avoid being in this situation. I do get frustrated at seeing people abuse their bodies- admittedly,it’s their choice-but such a waste…
I pity them actually. I was a smoker before all this started. 2 weeks after dx I decided to try for the first time ever to quit, not replacement therapy or anything. It was actually easy. I felt like a prat for never having the guts before… that was 3 months ago.
So I’d say I don’t get angry or anything but I wish they knew what I know. But hey if you’re living with this beast who’s got any right to tell you what to do. In fact who has the right even if you’re not.
I was a very heavy smoker before dx in February and have not touched a ciggie since that date !! Before dx i always thought cancer would happwn to someone else. Now I have had it, I want to maximise my chances of it not returning and smoking was the first thing to go.
me too, I gave up the fags “cold turkey” after diagnosis with BC. Nobody said that it was my fault for having been a heavy smoker but I figured that smoking was no longer important to me when I knew what it felt like to be told I had cancer. NOT being told I’ve got cancer again in the future, somewhere else in my body, is more important to me than the want for a cigarette. I am RICH now as well, not even the bloody price put me off before.
Currently, it’s driving me nuts that hubby says there’s no point at all in eating or trying to live healthily since he’s always seen me do all the healthy stuff and I still got BC. Am at a loss. Don’t want to fight this only for him to have a blimmin’ heart attack in a few years! (Could probably manage without the old s*d, but he’s my old s*d and I don’t want to try.) Still, at least he doesn’t smoke, doesn’t do too much stress and only drinks a bit more than gov guidelines. However, five fruit and veg a day is a completely alien idea for him and I don’t think that me eating veg for 2 will help!
what does p me off is hearing people who just have to have cosmetic breast surgery because their boobs arn’t big enough,pert enough or whatever why not leave things as they are and be glad for what they’ve got !!
I had a breast uplift and boy am I paying for it now, its half the reason they had trouble seeing my lump through all the scar tissue. But I didnt have it done because I was vain, I had severe depression for nearly 20 years, anyway due to the old fashioned anti depressants they slowed you down to make you zombie like and that included your metabolism. I also had a bad reaction to Prozac and ended up on steriods. The long and short of it is I put on five stone due to medication. I didn’t ever eat meals as I was so unhappy about life and how fat I looked. Finally the depression started to lift and through hard work and excercise I lost nearly five stone, unfortunately due to this my breasts lost all there fat too and were down to my belly button. I developed that body thing where you think you are so repulsive you can’t look in the mirror and I wouldn’t let my husband see me naked. One day something happened and my boob fell out of a bra and sagged down and a guy I didn’t know made a comment about them being in different post codes from each other. I was devastated. I guess what I am trying to say is not everyone has breast surgery to be vain, mine was because I felt so awful and had caused my depression to return again. But like I say I am paying for it now because yes there is a lump but its harder to see due too all the scar tissue.
My mother and best friend who are totally against cosmetic surgery, admitted when I showed them how bad my breasts were they would have had surgery too.
But I agree, that people like Jordan are freaks and are just doing it for money and vanity, but some people do do it for mental health reasons.
PS I do hope I have not offended anyone with this post, but just wanted to say that sometimes there are deeper reasons for having any kind of surgery done.
Hi Jules, I understand why you had your boobs done, but I agree some people (like Jordan) take it too far - and then they whinge when the op goes wrong, or they are never happy with how they look when they looked bloody marvellous in the first place. I would love a boob lift, and I am not ashamed to admit that I AM vain, but my mum has always warned me and my sister (who is flat chested and her ex offered to buy her some implants) against this kind of surgery because there is BC in my family. If I had had a masectomy I would have gone for an implant, but I am not gonna go under the knife purely for vanity because I remember how uncomfortable I was for the weeks following my surgery which was onle a Wide Local Excision. How anyone can have more invasive surgery on BOTH boobs at the same time when there was nowt wrong in the first place I will never understand.
Oh and I think you are a star losing all that weight the way you did at the same time as battling depression.
Thanks clarabel, I was worried that I would offend someone, but just wanted to say the bit about it not always being about vanity. And yes I agree about going through surgery for vanity on both breasts is just crazy. I didn’t realise just what a big op it was. I am nearly an e so they are huge. For 24 hours I was on a morphine pump (bloody marvellous stuff) but the pain was awful, I didn’t have any inclination that it would be as painful as it was. The surgery took 3.5 hours which is a long time.
Thanks for the complement about loosing weight, one day I thought enough is enough and went to weight watchers. I didn’t expect my breasts to loose so much fat, they litteraly looked like two bananas handing down.
The consultants secretary took a before and after picture, I was mortified having the “before” picture done in front of her.
Hi Ladies, I think I must be super sensitive but I met a ‘friend’ today and I told her about the bc and she said’it is always something with you isn’t it ? or If it isn’t one thing with you its another’. I was most upset and knew if a friend told me they had me I certsinly wouyld not say something like that. I have had my rant and moan !!!
Hi Rach well all I can say is she is NO friend ’ The Bitch’ . You are not super sensitive you have b*****y… s****y BC. We are all highly sensitised. Drop her and x her off your xmas card list. Lots of love Bobbiex
Rachy I just wanted to say that exactly the same thing happened to me when I told a ‘friend’ about my breast cancer she remembered quite a few years back when I was really ill for quite a while due to a dairy intolerance and said ‘you’re always ill’. In fact, I’m generally hardly ever ill. I just couldn’t believe she could say this! I don’t think I’ll ever have anything to do with her again. I wasn’t that friendly with her anyway.
Bobbie, she’ll certainly be dropped off any of my lists!
I had a friend who asked how I knew it wouldn’t come back in the other one! … lovely … been avoiding her since …
on the irritation front I am not that irritated about what people chose to do with their bodies - in that it’s their choice and it’s impossible to control someone else and there is a lot of conflicting advice … as long as they don’t bleat about it … I hate smoking anyway … so enough said about that …
having said that i would prefer it if my family all looked after themselves perfectly …
WHAT DOES REALLY BOTHER ME NOW is … PETTINESS!
drives me nuts - I just think for goddness sake just get a life and get on with it … I do appreciate that people have problems and all need help but quite frankly drama queens beware … you’ll get your head snapped right off!!!
if someone can’t have a bit of a sense of humour and a relaxed approach to life but would prefer to get all uptight about minor blooming things then I’m getting to the point where they can just S*D OFF!
don’t you find its quite surprising where some of these outbursts come from???
I have just had the 2nd of two surgery’s this last one was to remove and test my lymph nodes and also to remove both breast implants that I had 12 years ago.
i was in my late twenties and completely flat chested, the cosmetic surgery made me feel so much more confident and i don’t regret ever having it done. It was never for anyone else and nobody ever guessed that i had as they were not huge just normal!!!
Don’t judge everyone the same, I’m not obsessed with my looks and I am dealing with some not very pretty boobs now. but life comes first.
As the lady says above live and let live everyone has the right to choose even if its not right for you its their decision.
