Anyone in area? Due to have a masectomy in next few weeks, I’m 30 and have a toddler…finding it hard to talk to 'friends’x
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Take care
Lucy
Yes, I’m in Pembrokeshire… Had sentinal nodes removed and mastectomy with immediate reconstruction in Swansea and now in Withybush for adjuvant chemotherapy, first session yesterday. if you’d like a chat anytime I’m here 
Lins
Hiya Lins, sorry to hear your in same position, how is the treatment going? Hope it’s not been too awful for you.my apt for mx is on 26th of this month so not long to go.having immediate reconstruction wwith Becker implant. Can I ask did you have skin or implant done? Wondering how painful it all is and rough timescale for recovery. I’m having it done because they didn’t get clear margins during lumpectomy. I have high grade dcis and nothing more sinister was found either in tumour or nodes so after nd I won’t need any chemo or radiotherapy. Hope your doing ok,speak soon Laura x
Hiya Lins, sorry to hear your in same position, how is the treatment going? Hope it’s not been too awful for you.my apt for mx is on 26th of this month so not long to go.having immediate reconstruction wwith Becker implant. Can I ask did you have skin or implant done? Wondering how painful it all is and rough timescale for recovery. I’m having it done because they didn’t get clear margins during lumpectomy. I have high grade dcis and nothing more sinister was found either in tumour or nodes so after nd I won’t need any chemo or radiotherapy. Hope your doing ok,speak soon Laura x
Hi I’m in Haverfordwest. A little bit further done down the line than you (chemo,surgery,radiotherapy, Herceptin) but if you want to chat about anything I’m here. It’s a scary,confusing and emotional time so any support I can give you just let me know. S x
Hi Laura, sorry for delay in reply - been in hospital with high temp… I had skin saving surgery, silicone implant and Strattice mesh. Very happy with outcome, obviously different when naked but when in bra you’d never know. Recovery was a breeze, they were so happy wanted to send me home the following day after op… once the drain was removed (ouchy) after a couple of weeks really full steam ahead recovery wise and although didn’t drive and careful about lifting etc initially - no real issues at all. Lins xxxx
Heya ladies sorry I’ve not replied as been in for the mx and immediate recon. Had a single mx but implants on both. It’s been 4 weeks since op and had few up and down ddays.today physically has been great, didn’t wake up in pain and been able to do a few jobs without worry.the problem I have at the moment is friends or lack of. The people who have shown the most concern have bbeen people I hardly know, New colleagues etc and people I know through other people. Those people whom I thought were friends have hardly bothered.is it just they don’t know what to say or do I need to walk away from those friendships? This is the time I’ve needed them the moat and they have all let me down. Am I being too sensitive? Caused an argument with the husband tonite so he’s buggered off with his mates. I’m jealous I guess too of how others seems to have their besties no matter what?any advice please???the cancer at the moment seems like a pesky annoyance and this is upsetting Me much more.
Hi, I understand what you mean about friends. I have had fantastic support and particularly with some, whom i have only met recently. They have been amazing. I have a couple of old friends who have all but disappeared. I’m not sure why, but I think one thing breast cancer teaches us is, you really find out who your friends are. A neighbour, who I have known casually for.a few years has gone out of her way to call me every week for a chat. She probably doesn’t realise how much this means to me.
i don’t think you are being too sensitive, but you’ve just had major surgery and are still recovering, so be kind to your self. Good for you for coming this far. I’m hoping for a trip to Pembs soon, to see the in laws, but fear it may be brief as I am awaiting mx with tissue expander implant. Can I ask, did you have silicone straight away or tissue expanders ?
take care
Zuleika x
Heya Zuleika,
thanks for replying.glad it’s not just me being emotional and hormonal then.a friend has just been messaging me and said it’s because ahe doesn’t know what to say and can’t afford to buy me flowers.I’m upset she thinks that thats all I would want from her, shes recently been through some really tough family stuff and I was there for her even though I had no clue how to help.
Friends of my mother in law who I’ve meet alot as they have children the same age of my daughter have been amazing and it helps lots but still hard to talk to them properly.
I had two Becker implants fitted. I’m very small and the right side has been inflated to a b cup.(wasn’t even an a before so this is taking some getting used to lol) the mx side has a tiny inflation and going next week to have first proper one done.the consultant said this way was best for me and his preferred way so… I had quite alot of skin taken away during mx op as lost nipple and has large scar area from lumpectomy.
Where about are you? It’s lovely down in pembs,perfect for trips of you have family here too. I’ve been here about 10years now and can’t see us living anywhere else unless we have a big lotto win. How are you feeling about the pending op?I was fine until night before. I’ve sptoken to and seen a lady who had expander and it looks great. She’s been really helpful to me.
Take care of you too,
Laura x
Hi Laura, I live near Oxford, so quite a hike to Pembs. I love it, especially Marloes Sands. I’m ok about the op, in 3 weeks, but had been told slightly different things by 2 surgeons and bcn. I thought I was having straight silicone, then they mentioned expander to the mx side. I’m a 32a and they said I could go up to a B cup, but will plan on doing the other side at a later date, by the plastic surgeon. How long we’re you in hospital ? Did you have drains ?
anyway, hope all goes well
Angela ( Zuleika)
I lived in Oxford for a summer when doing placement, Whitney? It’s beautiful there too,but yeah one long drive.I went in in the Tuesday evening, surgery Wed morning and was out on the Monday.I had one drain in rlight side and two in left. Not gonna lie the one in the right was horribly painful to cone out, it was in very deep and guess it’s because all the tissue is still the’re in that breast so hurt alot more.they put me on a morphine drip controllers by me ans also had paracetamol, tramadol and ibuprofen so eexpect to be a zombie for first couple of days. My advice would be to take any painkillers when you can, the pain creeps up on you. I was super hot in hospital and it was before the heat wave so had a fan constantly going.the nurses were brilliant and I had the same as you with different people saying different things. I just asked main consultant and went with what he said.when is your op? I tried to do as much fun stuff as I could before going in but it’s still frustratingly boring afterwards.do you have any hobbies that aren’t too strenuous? I knit and am also into my gardening but have to do little bits.the running and swimming have to wait a little whole longer.
I have a 16month old daughter and that’s when I’ve found it the hardest. Not being able to cuddle or pick her up,getting easier now but still very limited.
Take care,Laura x x
Hi, I live in Swansea , always around if you want to chat. What hospital did you have op in Laura? I’ve had 2 Wles ( last one Monday in Bridgend) and ANC. Ct scan tomorrow in Neath, port talbot and then the dreaded results and then chemo before rads.
lived in Swansea for 24 years originally from northwest of England, love it here, got all that coast , the growecoastline is amazing, love Pembrokeshire too glad many a brill time there. Hope you recovering well from surgery must be difficult with small children, mine are sort of grown up ( they are boys so do they ever really grow up!!!).
Going to be off work for awhile ( staff nurse) so keep in touch if you want to chat. Take care x
Hi lols,
I had nd in Swansea, morriston hospital.can’t really believe it’s already been 4 weeks.I was very impressed with the nurses there, made me feel much better about my situation as they took their time to talk to me and help. I haven’t been in touch with bcn from withybush much as is hard talking over the phone and I usually find I’m upset more when they are off duty.found this place great but do feel like I need to talk to someone properly. Maybe I need counselling? I have spoken to my sister’s friend who has had nd but she lives away so it’s not a regular thing. If you’ve read my above post you can see in having issues with non cancer literate friends,they just don’t understand so stay well clear by the looks of things.
How long has all your treatment taken to get to this stage if you don’t mind me asking? It mjust be hard to still work in way but it’s a good distraction too.my toddler is amazing at lifting my down Times when especially awake,but I try not to be upset and crying in front of her. I’d love a boy next,had planed to start tryin but this all happened. Nevermind, plenary of time and all that jazz.I’m 31 in couple of weeks, think in a way that makes it harder to accept but then on the other hand in young and fit enough to get tthrough it with out too many holdouts hopefully.
I’m originally from Aberdare so not too far away from family and know Swansea for shopping trips.
Hope your evening in work wasn’t too stressful or hot,take care and would love to speak more, Laura x z
I’m a nurse in Morrison hosp. Been working there for at least 13 years, currently I’m off work as had 2 ops in last month and due chemo soon, not sure when, not allowed to work on ward then , too many germs.
found a lump beginning of may had mammogram and biopsy ( paid for them) because if not wouldn’t be seen till some time in June, had biopsy 17 th may was told on day by surgeon was def cancer, but to see him week after for biopsy results. 24 th may all confirmed but they couldn’t fit me in for surgery. Eventually had surgery pow, Bridgend on general ward else would have to wait. Grade 3 disc, 4 /25 lymph involved, had wle and ANC.
He got everything out but one margin was close but he said radiotherapy would deal with it, but would do another op if I felt better about it, had 2 nd op Monday , Bridgend again !!! Now got ct scan tomorrow which is my biggest worry to be honest, being a nurse makes this dx difficult you tend to know too much but not enough, they always say nurses and drs worst patients. I’m back on Monday for wound check and maybe scan results, no idea when chemo starts had no appt yet.
im 48, got 2sons, live with partner ( he’s originally from Ireland). I find it difficult to talk to my friends as they can’t get my fears, they see you looking well, and I’m sure they think well you’ve had your op your fine now, they do mean well and have all been lovely but non cancer friends just don’t get it.
in singleton hosp there’s a place called maggies you can just go In I was dreading it but its lovely, you can also see a counsellor but have to make an appt, look up maggies on line they were brill with me, worth a try. Must be difficult dealing with this at your age and with a child so young, but it sounds like your plan is sorted and it all looks good for you.
Sometimes I feel things are moving to slow especially when I read about others on forum, but it be the protocol in Wales, my team seem in no rush to do anything. I’m around as I said if your feeling down , take care x
Thanks for that I’ll look into the Maggie’s option.I’m goin to Morrison on Friday for my first inflation apt.had words with ‘friends’ ans they have said sorry bit basically they are too busy to be there for me still,feeling a bit better about it today,maybe it’s because I’ve cleared the air with them and now can move on to making New friends or just being more reliant on myself and family.I don’t know really…
Your treatment has been very quick, I tthought mine was,I found it difficult to get head round it sometimes it was happening so fast. I had lumpectomy and they didn’t get clear margins either. I have/had grade 3 dcis with no family history.also had 6 nodes removed but they were clear.mother in law has tried to put me on Moravia natural remedies etc.she’s a bit bonkers about it all, I’m not convinced bit trying few to keep the peace.
Hope you are able to enjoy the weekend without worrying too much about Monday, take care x x
Thanks Laura, good luck with inflation, when I’ve my results and plan I can come upto work and meet you when u have another appt, if I’d like, no prob for me 5 mins from home and it’s my second home anyway. Upto you though .have a good weekend going to be a hot one x ju
That would be lovely , will speak later in week to see you how got on and maybe make arrangement. Have good weekend x x