I do think we can be cured.I was told by my oncologist when I went for first chemo that “we are going for cure here”.But because BC is so unpredictable we never use the word cured it is best to say NED.I usually say when asked that all is good at the moment.
If you don’t like a thread you don’t have to post on it you know.And if you believe you are cured then thats good for you.Dont think you will make the 253 years though 
Melxx
I was also told 'we are going for curative treatment’and I do my best to live my life with that in mind. I’ve also found it easier to get the focus onto other things when people ask me more quickly as time has gone on. I am sometimes surprised by the very personal questions people ask around my health-but I do know they are usually trying to be supportive, and not avoid the subject etc.Its just that I feel some things are private, and I’d much rather talk to them about other stuff!
Hi
I have just finished my treatment, last week and was told by the breast nurse that the cancer has gone and that they hope it will not reoccur but cant not give you that for a certainty. i agree with with Linda that yes we will be cured after successful treatments but we also don’t know what lies in front of us. that is why we have to stay positive and get on with our life.
Gretchen I hope all goes well for you, but like Mel if you don’t like this post just don’t put a reply on it. I think this forum is terrific for giving all points of view and advice to people and have found it has helped me through the last 9 months.
All the best to everybody.
Love Anne xx
I am interested to read this thread because I’ve noticed its something people say to me, like its ok because it’s curable…you can beat it!
And sometimes I get upset and I want to point out to them…actually there is no cure.
Then I realise I dont actaully know. No one has ever told me.
I do want the truth though.
Hi
I know how you feel, people seem to think after you have finished treatment that is it all over for us. I know they are only being kind but it is something that always lingers on our minds. Like you I don’t know about ever being cured but my way of coping is to keep positive and get on with life as best I can.
Love Anne xx
I don’t think it’s entirely right to say BC always comes back. My aunty died about 2 months before I was diagnosed. She had very aggressive BC, with all of her lymph nodes involved at the start of the 70s and was on one of the first trials they had for chemo (the drug was 5FU). Another relative was a young doctor working with the Consultants who were handling the trial and he said compared to the treatments we are lucky to have now, women back then had a very poor prognosis. In my aunty’s case it never came back and she died of old age 36 years on. It was in her family as both her mother and sister died from it. I don’t know, maybe the generation of women who went through WW2 handled things differently, but she accepted her lot, got on with it and was the cheeriest lady I have ever known. I think about her a lot when I get down myself.
My oncologist told me at the start of chemo that she saw a lot of ladies in their 70s for check ups who are 20 and 30 years on from their initial diagnosis. A breast nurse who was doing my Herceptin told me this as well.
If you get bc again at a ripe old age, it is no different to someone who had never had it getting it, really.
My Mum was 76 when she was diagnosed and died at 80. As far as I know, no-one else in our family had had it. At the time, I was told I was at no greater risk because a great many older women will get it, regardless of genes (as far as they know). I put mine down to HRT, something my Mum never took.
I was told by a lovely Spanish locum oncologist that I was cured. I know he was just reassuring me, but it was lovely to hear, even if we all know they can’t really guarantee that.
Ann x
Regarding the older ladies, I read that something like a third of older ladies that die of other causes are found to have micro breast cancer tumours.
finty x
Cherub, my chemo nurse told me that people never really die of b cancer anymore !!! They say what people want to hear and that’s fair enough.
Nobody knows, people have different opinions. It may come back, it may not. As I said before…if it hasn’t come back, just stay vigilant but most of all try to get on with the rest of your life.
Julie
In my opinion, if it comes back, it comes back and I’ll deal with it then. I’m not going to worry about it but will always be vigilant and a tad paranoid!
Julia xx
Its not that it always comes back-sometimes it doesnt,often it doesnt,but the possibility is always there and like it or lump it I dont believe any honest clinician-oncologist or other will use the word ‘cured’ in relation to breast cancer until we die of a ripe old age many years after dx the possibility,not the certainty, of recurrence is there.
Live long and prosper xxxx
V
hi, after reading some of the comments i wonder if ive been kidding myself . i had it in my head that now my treatment is over that im fine, been there and done it and all that chapter closed . however reading the comments that were never really cured alarms me , am i living in a bubble or just getting on with my life trying not to dwell . the thought that it could return terrifies me so maybe i should just go back to burying my head in the sand x
Hi gotthet-shirt
Welcome to the BCC forums where I am sure you will receive lots of valuable support and shared experiences, in addition please feel free to call our helpline for further support and a listening ear on 0808 800 6000, the line is open weekdays 9-5 and Sat 9-2.
Take care
Lucy
thanks Lucy , a friend of mine is a volunter for bcc after herself having gone through it . she strongly feels the bcc was a vital support to her and now i understand why , wish id taken the plunge earlier thanks x
I’m with you on this, Val. If my onc told me that I’m cured I’d lose all confidence in him.
I know that I will never know if I’m cured; I’ll only know if I’m not so I’m hoping not to know! That isn’t always going to be easy but I would rather know and accept the truth than be fobbed off with what someone - patronisingly - thinks I might want to hear.
I like the term No Evidence of Disease; it feels positive and truthful. Plus it reminds me that Life is for Living!
Eliza xx
I like those last sentences Eliza-sums it up really well I think.
Hi Ladies,
Must admit i was a bit taken aback when my onc said to me that BC always comes back , i quess what he meant was if you do live to a ripe old age and nothhing else gets you then BC always comes back eventualy, i dont know, and i guess we are all told different things,i also know of 2 ladies who had BC 25yrs+ ago and havent had a reocurrence but i dont know what their initial DX was , whether it was invasive or DCIS or what i dont know, ive asked them but they dont know either ,i dont think people were told so much back then. but i do know they had mastectomies but no other treatment which seemed to be the case a lot back then .
I agree that no honest oncologist will use the word “cure” because there are no guarentees with breast cancer, i will like everyone else remain vigilant though and i wont let the though of the "what ifs"rule my life to much as that would be a waste,
I realy hope that we all can remain NED from this vile desease for a very long time to come .I just wish sometimes that the non cancer world would get there facts right as i think they can quite often portray this desease in a very different way to what is the reality to those that are liveing with it, and that does a great diservice to those that now have secondries and those that have lost their life to BC.
Linda xx
Hi there,
As most of you, after a gruelling treatment and the forced smiles and sympathetic words of the breast cancer team that look after me in “the most reputable hospital on cancer treatment in U.K”, I was told my prognosis was very good and my chances of getting a recurrence were low.
After being misdiagnoses for over 6 months, as many other woman I have meet, and knowing bc patients that are also told “oh! your prognosis is very good” and, bang! 5, 10, 20 years after the nasty surprise or a recurrence, I still wonder why oncologist and the so cold breast cancer specialist, don’t use a more appropriate gradation when diagnosing cancer. I mean, obviously the lymph node involment does not seem very reliable when a lot of woman get mets and recurrence after a primary dx were there weren’t lymphs nodes affected. I can’t understand why they deny patients of the right knowing the real extend of their disease. Why they don’t carry on with test to reassure that we are really NED.
P.S lindiloo would you mind to tell me where are you being treated. I have always tried to find out if bc always recurred but never got a clear answer from my specialist.
Linda
I am glad I didn’t have your oncologist! Whilst I don’t want to bury my head in the sand, it would be nice to be left with some hope that we may not ever have bc again. My usual oncologist is of the “not saying much at all” school of oncology. When I asked, she went through Adjuvant Online with me and gave me statistics but certainly didn’t say it was definite that it would come back. I have an appt with her this month, so maybe I should ask her outright. I suppose all they can really say is that they don’t know.
Hope you are ok.
Ann x
Hi Ann,
My oncologist is lovely realy he is and i have had excelent care throughout my treatment, he even rings me after clinc, sometimes as late as 7pm to give me any scan results ive been waiting for to save me worrying for two weeks for results, i can ring his secretary at any time too with any concerns which is reasurring for me and i do have full trust in him and am realy glad to have him treating me,
I have always wanted to know everything about my cancer, i suppose because for me i feel more in control then and know how to deal with it, though not everyone feels like this and thats ok too .
Like all cancer specialists though, they all say different things to their patients according to thier own beliefs and expierences, i dont know if what he said was correct, and im sure many other cancer specialists will disagree with him, personaly i believe noone knows, not even our oncologists what may or may not happen in the future even those not DX with cancer dont know what the future holds so i dont let things worry me like that to much.
I also dont go much on statistics neither as i dont believe anyone or any doctor can tell you what will happen to you personaly so i try not to let that concern me also.
I think at the end of the day all of our our meds teams can realy only ever say that “they dont know,” because they honestly just dont.
Hope your ok too
Love Linda x
Hi happynipple, have sent you a PM x