Hi P
It is exactly 4 weeks today since mast and ax clearance. 15 nodes all clear thank goodness!
It’s great being back at work it is a great distraction (not too physical) although like you I have 2 kids one 15 months and one 4 years. Unlike you I am very lucky and have a partner who stays at home to take care of them and I go out to work.
When I got home from the hospital I made loads of effort to go out for a morning walk with my little boy before he went off to nursery. This got the blood going early doors and set me up for the day. It just seemed to boost my energy levels. I am not normally too self disciplined and can be useless at keeping up with things like this. This time though the determination seems to have come from a very different place.
Will definitely keep in touch with the trial stuff and you too.
Keep strong and try the morning walk thing it is quite amazing what you see as ypu stroll.
You are doing really well considering only 4 weeks ago you had op. Mine was 1st Feb so just coming upto 4 weeks. I had 2 lymph nodes positive but my tumour was removed in Dec. They all expected it to be benign as all tests had shown that so it was huge shock in Jan to find out it was BC and grade 3 IDC 24mm. They wanted to go back in and get clear margins but I asked for mastectomy so the report from that showed just 1mm left of cancer but I dont have any regrets.
I have been walking my daughter to school this week each morning and on week 2 ,I was up at the school collecting her with hubby. I am still sore around arm/shoulder area and armpit…just tender and I have slight cording but my scar is healing 100%. I think some of the tiredness is the emotional stuff plus not sleeping great. I am doing that 2-3am waking stuff thinking “is this all real” !!
Hi P
Hope everything is going Ok. It is awful when you cant sleep and does make a difference to how you deal with things.
I am in Doncaster in sunny South Yorkshire.
There are techniques that you can use to help to relax and chase the dark thoughts away. I expect the nurses can help as they must hear of many ways that people manage their thoughts.
I am ok, saw a healer today who I used before when I was trying to conceive 2nd bubs.She is going to teach me some techniques hopefuly before I start chemo.
I have not heard any of our bc nurses give advice on how to manage the thoughts !!!
The trial nurse at the hospital called me today and we are going in for a chat next friday and she is incorporating the chemo info session into the meeting so I will be there for about 2hours !!
Can I ask Sarah what was your bc? you come across as a very strong lady, any tips you want to share please feel free
My little boy is running high temp so best go check on him again…poor babe !
I am not as clued up on my BC as some here, It was Grade 3 so invasive; 30 - 40mm with clear nodes not ER+ or Her+. That is all I know. I found a small lump on Boxing day and went to GP next day who referred me immediately. Within the next 4 weeks I had been diagnosed and was preparing for surgery.
I feel much better after the surgery, before that I was conscious of it being there and wanted it gone.
I dont think I am very strong really and I share all of the anxieties that all of us have. I expect everyone is dealing with this in the only way they know how.
Where abouts in the country are you? I cant pick up an accent in your writing!!
Nice to hear back from you. It’s great you got seen and operated on quickly and that you have no nodes involved.
I know what you mean about surgery. I felt so relieved when I came out of hospital. Its only now I am getting a bit more worried about starting chemo. Still thats to be expected. I know what a daft thing for me to say about being strong…!! I meant it in the nicest way in as far as you come across pretty level headed and positive. I expect all of us have that worries and dark days, I know mine come and go and one day I think I am doing fine then all of a sudden it hits me again and I am in floods.
I am in Sunny Sussex, down South.
My little one is still pretty poorly I am just waiitng to hear from the out of hours doctors as he now can’t seem to bear even having fluid in his mouth so this is day 3 with a son who is sooooooooo unhappy and very hard to comfort. !! poor babe it just isn’t him.
Best go in case they call and I need to get him somewhere quick…!!
Hope the little one is feeling better now, it’s awful when they are off colour. It is one of the things we will have to watch out for as we go through the chemo. Kids just get everything that is going around. My little boy is at nursery and brings every bug he can find to share with the family. When I saw the nurse this week she told me that the week after the treatment is the time that you are most vulnerable, then you start to rebuild in preparation for the next dose. Lets hope the random trial selector is kind to us.
I was just looking through the different threads and there is another lady about to start chemo in sussex on the 12th… She had started a thread just called ‘treatment’. Maybe you should look her up, she may be local it would be good if you could have someone really close by to go through this with.
I hope mothers day is good and that the worst is over for your little boy, it is great how they bounce back once they feel a bit better.
I am OK at the moment emotionally and am more concerned about my hair and what to do. I have bought some hats and dont really suit them so look on a sliding scale between the ridiculous and sublime. Whichever style I try I just dont look right. I dont fancy just wearing scarves so it looks like I am going to have to get a wig this week which just saying makes me feel slightly odd.(I think there should be a recognised name for wig anxiety) I have had offers of people wanting to knit me hats or decorate my bald head with henna tattoos but I think it would be just too sore to do this!!
Try to keep positive, make those good days last longer and chase the dark thoughts away.
I am with the Onc on tuesday so should have some more info and hopefully the trial selection will be done so I can prepare myself. The chemo starts on friday regardless, (I just got wig anxiety again).
Great to hear from you…hows the wig worry going?I am looking into getting one too and have told my 6yr old she can come with me…!! eekkkkk why oh why did I say that !!she will no doubt look for something along the lines of Girls Aloud style…helpppppp. I had my hair cut short a few weeks back and it grows really quickly so I now need another one but keep thinking is it worth it. !
My little boy is alot better…well lets just say compared to how he was on Sat/Sun he has improved. I am hoping he is over the worst of it and will be back to his normal happy self very soon.
I do try and chase those dark thoughts away, my hubby is good at giving me positive thoughts and so is my mum so I do try hard to keep those thoughts in the front of my mind and tell the others to b@**** off.
So you are meeting your Onc tomorrow…good luck let me know how it goes.
Thanks for info on other lady in Brighton. I have put a message on that thread so will wait and see how she goes.
Right I am of to get dinner ready …hope you had good mothers day. I got brekky in bed, dippy egg and toast bless them…!! and some lush pressies…!!!How was your’s?
Had a great day yesterday, Kids made cards and we went out walking the dog with my mum. It was absolutely freezing. We were all glad to get home.
I still have wig anxiety and have not really done too much about it, I will have to make the effort and make an appointment. Problem I have is with my OH. Whenever we do anything like this we just cant be serious. We even had to miss out on a proper wedding because there was no way we could look at each other and speak without laughing. We just called into the registry office and signed the book and picked up the certificate our parents were the witnesses.
I will make an appointment and go this week. I just dont know about the cold cap it sounds really really cold!!! and like you I may have issues with childcare as they have told me that getting it all over in 4 hours is good, it will normally take a bit longer.
Glad your little boy is feeling better now and I think it’s great idea to take your daughter ‘wigging’ (I am making up my own words for it now!!)
I am hoping that tomorrow I find out about the trial and then on friday it all begins. I am starting to think that I may watch myself too carefully following the chemo and this may in itself make me feel worse, so I am now planning to work on the premise that unless I physically cannot I will carry on as normal.
Some of the threads on here are so good and there are some ladies who have been where we are who offer great support.
Pleased you had a good day yesterday and wish you many more like that.
Thanks for the good luck, and I will let you know how it goes.
Read your latest posting and would like to try and reasure you about wigs. Like me, you probably never gave wigs a second thought, but belive me there are some good ones out there. I thought I would wear mine before I needed to, to try and get used to it, and not even my family and friends noticed, what a confidence boost that was. And why not take your OH and have a good laugh when you are trying them on. My friend, who went thru all of this 7 years ago, went with me and we had a great afternoon! They say laughter is the best tonic and I agree, I’ve still managed to laugh an awful lot since being diagnosed in December and I’m sure it is helping me get through it.
Do exactly as you say, if you feel up to it, carry on as normal. I am due my second chemo this week and have led a full, active life since my first. Yes, this one or the next one might floor me, but its certainly got a fight on its hands!!
I have made an appointment and I am hopeful that the wig(s) will be purchased on Thursday afternoon. I am going to have my hair cut short this morning so have made a move and will hopefully be better prepared and feel a bit more in control.
Val that is a great attuiude, you are doing the chemo instead of the chemo doing you.
Will let ypou know how this afternoon with the Onc. goes
and … i took my chap with me when i went to the wig thing and we howled with laughter because i don’t have thick hair and they did look so funny. the lovely NHS hairdresser ordered some more in which were less hairy and i have one that looks good. scarves are more comfy at mo but i do wear the wig.
i should have looked at other threads before i set up my own but i am doing a tad of oh… chemo brain. had the second epirubicin last wed.
My scalp was so sore so sore but it is better for being being zizzed. I hope all goes well with next treatments - i’ve been lucky so far… just a bit more tired in the afternoons this time and disturbed sleep which should stop soon.
Hello Shellshocked
I am taking part in the TACT2 trial . I am on the standard arm , which does take the longest to complete. However, I have talked to everyone I can as I have worked in the hospital and know the pharmacists . This trial uses all tried and tested treatments for Breast Cancer. The trial is to find out which is the best way to administer the treatment to maximum effect. I am halfway through and the care has been exceptional …
Saw Onc today and Chemo will go ahead friday but no news on which leg of the trial I will be on as yet. It seems I will know on friday when I arrive for the first lot.
Thanks Marge for this it is good to know these additional details, it helps to build up a fuller picture.
I had my hair cut so short today it is just sticking up all over. I had not anticipated having such a bad haircut I would be glad to see the back of it but as strategies go it is not a bad one.
Well I am all set for 0830 on friday morning when the next leg begins for me. Thursday we will be wigging and stocking up on all of the goodies recommended in the top tips thread.
Sarah…Woo hoo that day you work chemo is not far away…how do you feel not knowing what part of trial you are on yet?
Short hair good for wigs…don’t fret just think of how many people you can be with the choice of wigs…!!
My old school mate is coming with me and my daughter to do my wig shopping. My friend went through bc at 36 so is now 7yrs on and has been such a great support. Funny I have not seen her perhaps for 20yrs and when i was pregnant I bumped into her and we exchanged numbers. I then heard through the old school network that she gone through Bc at a young age and then blow me 2yrs on from bumping into her I am dx, so I know we met for this reason plus its brilliant catching up with such a great lady and knowing I have a great friend in my future.
Great info ladies…I am due my chemo info/trial chat Friday pm so will let you know how it goes.
I have to have a ECG and blood tests before my chat with her…!!!Is that standard??
Good luck Sarah…let us know how it goes
Thinking of you
Hi P
Not too wrried obout not knowing which leg of the trial I am on as I think they all start pretty much the same, just keen to get the ball rolling.
I had to have blood tests last week for my appointment today, no ECG though, I expect it varies from place to place.
The blood they take to make sure that you are OK to start chemo so it may be next week that you start.
Looks like you will have a great day ‘wigging’ especially with someone who has true empathy. It’s great that you found each other after all this time.
Keep me posted on the shopping trip and I will let you know how things are this end.
Sorry what I meant by which one was at least you know the time scale as they differ a bit don’t they.
Apparently some of girls I know had an ECG just before surgery but they said I didn’t need one but this trial nurse says I do and it’s just part of the trial I guess to make sure I don’t have a dicky heart !!
Still its great to be getting it underway isn’t it.
I have just had a phonnecall from the trial nurse who was lovely and gave me the trial leg I will be on.
Looks like I will be on treatment B accellerated which is the shortest of all of the combinations at 20 weeks. I had secretly hoped for this one but in my mind I had convinced myself I would be having treatment A which is the longest.
Once friday is over this means only 3 more visits to the chemo suite.
Keep in touch & I will let you know how it goes on friday.
Oh excellent news…brilliant. I hope I get the same, fingers crossed but yes pls let me know how it goes Friday and I will tell you how I go too…Friday it is eh !!
P
I hope that you get group 4 too, it means that it all ends just as the summer holidays start for the kids which will make this years holiday all the more enjoyable. We love the North Norfolk coast so have booked a week away already to celebrate the end of the chemo.
It is better now because I know when things will be happening so can start to make plans around the hospital visits.
I have organised my formal return to work on monday and today we are ‘wigging’.
Tomorrow is a big day for us both, hopefully you will get to know your start date and maybe which leg of the trial you are on.
Good luck and I will let you know how it goes. I am there at 0830 in the morning so by lunchtime I should be home.
