I’ve got to go back to work today. Diagnosed with a recurrence on 16th Dec. Seeing my consultant this Friday when I’ll find out when my MX will be scheduled for. Xmas hold have sort of messed up the diagnosis/treatment time line and gutted I have to go to work for the next few days. Almost can’t face it and have some work outstanding from before Xmas that I feel guilty about. If the op isn’t next week might take some holiday and have some ‘me time’ as I don’t want to put my energy back into work at the moment.
Hi there,
Why don’t you ask your doctor to sign you off sick? This happened to me & there was no way I could concentrate on work as I was just a complete lump of jelly. However just to let you know my recurrence was 7 years ago now & I am now halfway through a reconstruction and fit as a fiddle. I thought my recurrence was the end but it’s really not, keep strong.
lbx157
Hi twinkly agree with ibx go to doctor I know there at people who have to work but if you have a choice then don’t the minute my sick note was signed the stress went away and i could concentrate on me! Obviously everyone is different some people need to work through it but I just knew if I was going to beat this I couldn’t work as well, definitely right decision for me, before this I was a workaholic!
Twinkly I was signed off two weeks before my op… Basically after my recurrence was confirmed… Your gp can sign you off if your minds not going to be on the job… I was diagnosed with fan on aug 23rd biopsy results confirmed on 29th then signed off from 1st sept and wasnt till 14th sept… Now had 4th Chemo so soon be looking at going back to work.
As for clearing your desk… If you were run down by a bus and in hosp you wouldn’t be able clear your desk so don’t feel guilty… Sometimes sh*t just happens.
Take care
Lulu x
Hi Twinky, I worked four months between diagnosis and surgery while taking pre-op tamoxifen, and how I didn’t kill anyone in that time I will never know, just very lucky I guess. Most people were astonished I could hold it together, and yes my mind was often miles away and the tamoxifen made it much worse, but then after surgery I had lots of sick time left to recuperate.
But if I was to do it again, I would most probly take the time off. Although I’m not sure that being home-alone would have been good for me. “Fit to work” isn’t just physical, so do consider a trip to the GP if you still feel awful: It’s not like it’s just a hangover!
Hoping your day has gone well, whatever you decided. Like Lulu said, nobody is indispensible at work, so someone else will just have to pick up whatever you couldn’t get finished. Not exactly your fault you got a recurrence, is it!
ibx, thank-you for the encouragement, it’s good to hear from the longer survivors’ view.
Hi. Thought I’d report back after my day back at work. Arrived late, getting ready to go was like moving through treacle and sat on the car for quite a while before going in but I made myself and I felt better as the day progressed although the disappearance of my boss without bothering to speak to me did me no favours! Managed to get one report out. Just one left and having help with that tomorrow from the trainee who accompanied me when I did the initial work. Am pleased I managed to get stuff done today! Gradually feeling the work guilt lift. Being lazy this evening watching rubbish TV rather than working late like I normally do. Will be glad when I have my appointment Friday and find out when everything is happening. Reluctant to be off sick now as will need plenty of time after everything else and conscious that my income will drop at some stage which I can’t afford. Will get through this week. Today was probably the hardest day. Tomorrow will be easier.
Thank you so much for your posts. Was feeling down and my boss is a bit of a nightmare too so have to be strong to deal with him too as well as my diagnosis. I did start to make enquiries at work in case there is someone who can provide alternative support to that supposed to be provided by my boss!
Twinky68 x
Twinkly do you ave an occupational health department? If so get in touch with them as they are there to support you in work.
Glad it went ok today but don’t pressurise yourself when you have so much more important stuff going on.
I am the ony one doing one aspect of my job and since I hv been off nobody has done it… Just waiting fr me when I go back!
But I will be looking forward to it when I do return.
Take care x
Lol…was in floods of tears today after my boss sent me an evil e mail moaning about everythig that I’ve not done on time in the last couple of weeks! He really is unbelievable (and just to give you some background a close friend at work died suddenly on 30th Nov, his funeral was 21st Dec and I gave a speech,I was diagnosed with cancer on 16th Dec and my father in law went into hospital on the day of the funeral for bowel surgery and I had a full body scan to see if it had spread the day after the funeral). The good thing is I got some help. Someone senior had a word with his boss and prompted by someone who could think a little clearer with me in my haze of tears I rang him and confronted him about the e mail and we’re back on track now. Did I need that to worry about at this time…no…did I get it sorted…yes…I’m stronger than I thought! He also said today, after I mentioned that if my surgery isn;t next week I wanted to take holiday as I don’t feel capable of working at the moment that I don;t have to take my holiday I can just be off work. So it does work standing up to bullies 
Big hugs to anyone else having boss troubles at this bad time
Twinky x
Well done you!!! As if you don’t have enough to worry about?? xx
Well done Twinky, it’s great that you got what you wanted and need. Legally you’re covered by the Single Equalities Act and your employer is required to make “reasonable adjustment” for you, which they seem now to have done! I was totally unable to work after my original dx before treatment, but had nearly 3 weeks between recurrence dx and surgery so did go into work and found it helped to take my mind off it - but my boss (and occupational health) were great and did not pressure me at all. Hope all goes well with your mx. Love Mo xx
Thanks Mo. I would have been quite happy doing some work but he’s bloody useless and he prefers to take the stance you’re either well enough or you’re not! Trying to find out who I can talk to in HR. Work for part of a large banking group. My company used to have a separate in-house HR dept where you could go for a drink/moan/box of tissues but now it’s all centralised with menus to wade through if you ring the helpline number. All very alien and unhelpful if you’re feeling distressed at all! Thought if I sorted out contact details for a real person now then if I feel the need (and the boss continues to be useless) I already have the contact wthout traumatising myself further…well that’s the plan anyway.
Take care
Twinky x
Well done, Twinky
Sadly your boss probly will continue to be what he is (description deleted) but he will think twice before jumping on you again - Score!!
Very impressive Twinky well done you. and very sensible to get contact details now when you’re not in a tis.