I have been feeling a bit sorry for myself - hoping today will help me snap out of it as I am going to see some puppies!!! I hope to be bringing one home with me if one of them falls in love with me!
After much thought I finally put the wheels in motion for early retirement on medical grounds last Friday so now I am waiting to hear what I will be offered. I was relieved at having made the decision but it has also slammed home to me the realities of my situation - horrible.
Geared myself up for my last chemo on Monday - no good, neutrophils too low again! I so want to get this out of the way and start feeling better again, I hope! Even if only for a few months so I get on with living not existing between chemo sessions and keeping my ‘brave face’ going.
My horrible lumps on my arms and legs have started to ooze so I have large plasters all over - I didn’t look nice before that!
I so hope the puppy will give me a boost! I will post a piccy if I am lucky enough to get one.
Bless you Sue you sound like you need something to cheer you up and this puppy could just be the thing…go pick a good one, or should that be let a good one pick you…just watch out for little sharp teeth and claws if your skins fragile…sending virtual hugs.
susie,
sending you hugs-i retired in december(the process took nine months) and although it’s a huge decision, I know it was the right one for me.I hope you find your puppy- mine is now a year old, and is sitting next to me,decidly smelly after jumping into the park lake this morning
nicky
I stopped working in Nov 08 and it’s taken me this long to get my head round it, so don’t be surprised if it takes you a while to get used to retirement. But I’m now glad I’m not working and I’m looking forward to spending this summer in the garden.
i’ve just started a topic in after treatment on pain and tiredness.
i said that i’m not fit to go back to work but forgot to say that my work is in the process of retireing me on health ground. so i can understand how you feel. i have een told that it’ll be a while before they can tell me what my pension will be.
i have just got a dog from the dogs trust last week, she is about 9 month old.
the dogs trust will give you a fully vacinated and nuetered dog. i’m glad to have a bit of company when the rest of the family is out during the day. so good luck with the dog hunting and you’ll enjoy having one.
Hi Susie
Sorry that you are feeling so low but I do know how it is when chemo looms and you want to get it over with only to have the last one postponed. Hope you found a gorgeous puppy who we all adopt as a cyber pup Look after yourself and see if you can have a good weekend as you won’t be having that chemo just yet.
Nicky x
ps as to the retirement on health grounds I would have bitten their arm off if I could have had it! Work just gets in the way of me enjoying myself.
Well, although I no longer do any lecturing, I don’t really consider myself ‘retired’ - although I left work on health grounds with a financial package. I tell myself I may do a couple of hours or so when I feel like it. I suppose this is my coping mechanism, and my way of dealing with the end of the ‘working me’. For me it works, because I know that tomorrow or the next day, I may pick up the phone and talk to a future employer or voluntary organisation. So far I’ve had all sorts of 'reasons/excuses for not doing so - tiredness/lack of confidence/the sun is shining/it’s too cold to get out of bed, let alone to work.
I suppose what I’m saying is this may be a new phase, this may not be a casr of ‘you’ll never work again’ - but you probably wil work ‘differently’.
I hope that helps and that the future may not seem so bleak, the important thing is to waste no time, on stupid things and stupid people - stupid dogs are allowed!
Thank you to all of you for your support. I have got my puppy, a little bitch that the family have unanimously named Bella. She will be 9 weeks old on Sunday and I will be popping her down to meet her Vet tomorrow for her first injection.
She definitely ‘chose’ me with her lovely eyes and face and when I picked her up she immediately sunggled in - perfect. A long journey to get her though, 360 mile round trip up to Berwick on Tweed for my wonderful Working Bearded Collie.
Apart from feeling tired out with the journey, I am thrilled to bits with her and know that she will be taking me on plenty of long walks very soon.
I will get a photo up of her soon, she is much better looking than me.
Your puppy sounds totally wonderful, and I wish you and her the best life together! Like so many posting here, I took early retirement on health grounds in early 2007 (3½ years after my bone & liver mets dx), when the regeneration programme I was working for came to an end. I too thought I’d pick up some short-term work, consultancies, etc. with the vol org I’d worked with, but discovered I didn’t really want (or need) to do that, and felt so much better, stronger and less stressed. Because I’d worked mostly in the voluntary sector, I had several little pension funds, which my organisation’s financial advisor put together to buy a special annuity for people who are ill and not expected to live very long – now there’s a perk: much better pension payments for us! I’d have gotten more if I smoked & drank . . . (please PM me if you want more info about this).
Hope you get your next chemo soon, and that your energy & quality of life improve very quickly as you run around with your new puppy.
Congratulations on the puppy. Speaking from experience (we got our Springer, Bonnie, in January) she will leave you with little time to dwell on the other unpleasantness in our lives. The warmer weather and long walks is great medicine, believe me… I hope you will soon be reaping the benefits and feeling much better.
just wanted to say congratulations on your new puppy too, hope he meakes you feel a little brighter. I got a little cavalier king charles spaniel pup in January a month before being diagnosed with secondaries. He absolutely makes my day just now, he is lying on my lap as i type, a constant source of love and companionship couldnt imagine him not being part of the family now.
Well done on your puppy. Having dogs has been a real help to me during treatment - gets me out walking when I don’t really want to - but always feel better for making the effort. Plus lovely to have a warm dog to snuggle up to when you’re feeling down.
I have had a good but tiring day as I have been out in the garden every hour with Bella establishing where she does her business rather than my kitchen floor! She is doing really well and is already adopting classic sheep dog’lie down’ position aka ‘One Man & His Dog’ sheep trials.
She has had a full check up with the Vet today and all is okay and she didn’t whimper or anything when she had her innoculation. I will try and be just as brave tomorrow when I go to see if my bloods are okay for my last chemo postponed from Monday!
Hubby hasn’t downloaded the photos yet but I will have a new picture on here when he does. Look out!!!
Just catching up with forum and so very pleased to hear you got your much longed for puppy!!! Bella is a lovely name I’m sure you will have a lovely time with her now spring is in the air getting out and about. My beautiful dog Lucy just looks at me with her big brown eyes and makes me smile.
Here she is. The long awaited puppy. Here she is sat next to the snowdrops in the garden when she arrived last Wednesday pm. She is settling in well and only cried for her brothers and sisters for two nights.
I will be able to start walking her just after Easter weekend - I can’t wait.
Oh Sue she is lovely - wish I was close by for a puppy cuddle, love that new puppy smell. What a great time of year to get her as well with spring on it’s way and lots of nice walks to look forward too. You are going to have such fun with her.
Look after yourself and see if you can have a good weekend as you won’t be having that chemo just yet.