Chemo or not , why given a choice!!

Hi I’m new here been lurking last few weeks , my wife has recently been diagnosed with BC at 40 years old on May 9th , had lumpectomy a week later , cancer removed and  nodes and margins are clear so no more surgery thankfully, We saw the oncologist last night and he suggested Chemo , rads and HT from the start  but says it’s her choice ! We expected the rads and HT for definate and the surgeon said maybe chemo but he doubted it , so now we face this choice of chemo or not , We know it’s down to us /my wife ultimately but overall do the benefits outweigh the struggle of it ? At present she has not been sick as such , little groggy and limited after surgery but that’s it and after a week back to normal really and by the looks of it chemo other than being told you have BC is the worst part of all of it , feeling sick , losing hair , being tired ect !

And if its needed why not say " you need to have chemo " instead of " tou can choose to have chemo " !! I’d rather we was told yes you have to have it or no you dont need it not its upto you if you do or dont ! 


her tumor was 21mm, grade 3 , her2 negative, hormone positive, no node involvement  clear margins and has been offered 4 rounds of TC chemo , 10 years HT and 4 Weeks of rads !

We suggested the DX test and he said no problem will take 2 weeks but he thinks it will come back over the threshold of 15 that’s suggested for her age and as she is pre the menopause , we know chemo is an added extra protection and the thoughts of "what if " if she chose not to but we also know nothing is definite , we was shown the predict website and out of 100 by adding chemo it added 5 extra survivors but also showed over 75 survived without any further treatment at all !! 


Sorry to be long winded but we are really lost on what to do and we need to decide this weekend as he wants to start chemo on Wednesday 


So our question is has anyone had  the same results and chose not to have the chemo ?? 


I was in almost exactly the same position three months ago . Clear margins and nodes 2.4 cm tumour . All  gone . I am 61 . I chose to have the chemo because I didn’t want to think 'what if ’ in years to come . Had 3 FEC and 2 Taxol so far seven weekly to go  . It really has not been bad at all . Not been sick once kept my hair thanks to cold cap and my advice for what it is worth would be do it . Any stray cells will be swept up and if I am one of the six extra survivors figure I was given will be v grateful