I had an mx on Aug 14th after 6 months of chemo. I’m now half way through rads and by Nov hopefully that will be me done. I don’t think I want a reconstruction, I just want to feel comfortable with the body I now have. Just wondered how other ladies have coped/adjusted. It’s not really to do with sex, just my own self-esteem.
Thanks Clare
Hi Clare
I had a bilateral MX in February following 6 months of chemo. I was offered reconstruction but declined. I am an older lady (62) and have been married for 44 years to the most caring partner imaginable.
I knew from the outset that I would not have a problem with no breasts. I go without prothesis sometimes and depending on the circumstances wear prothesis sometimes. I really do not feel any less a person and am comfortable in my own body. My scars are healed well and I am hopefully moving on. If you want to ask any specific questions pm me and I will do my best to tell it from my point of view
Andie
Hi Clare
I had a mastectomy and was in two minds about reconstruction but during the time I’ve had no left breast (2 years) it hasn’t bothered me that much. I will have reconstruction as I’m still young and think that long term it’ll be good for me in terms of relationships. I did go into a year relationship just after my mastectomy and I don’t remember it ever being an issue or problem so the way I think is that if you feel comfortable not having it done, then that’s the way to go. You can always change your mind in the future.
Ruby
Hi Clare,
I had a mx in June 2007 with no reconstruction and I can honestly say I’ve been absolutley fine. It does pop into my head from time to time that I could have a reconstruction but quite frankly I don’t think I could face the surgery and I’m happy just to get on with my life. I too have a very caring husband and it was never an issue with him, he just wanted me well.
Take care
Veggie
Hi Clare
I had mx in June 2007 and don’t want to bother with recon. Only difficulty I have is with making sure I wear tops that are high enough so that they don’t drop forward at the neckline. Otherwise I am fine with it. My scar is neat and tidy and not at all unpleasant to look at. I am nearing 60 and have same partner for 35 years. Would I have recon if I were younger? I don’t know!
Good luck
Topper
Thank you all for your comments - its good to know that you have all coped so well. Sometimes I get rather sad at the loss, but I try to tell myself its early days yet. I also found a comment on an American site which said that the loss of a breast was an exchange for a good chance of life. So I try to cling to that also.
Clare X
Hello Ladies,
I had radical mastectomy on August 13 and I don’t mind at all missing a breast. I am 53 and my boobs are the least of my worries (esthetically speaking)… I am alive!
Clare, how are the rads sessions going ? I still haven’t started mine yet… the wound is on the way to healing (a couple of weeks to go still) so I might start mid-november. I hope you are doing well.
Take care all,
Sonia
xx
Hi Topper
I have the same problem as you. I worry about my top falling forward even if it has quite a high neck. My prosthesis is quite heavy (even though it is a lightweight one!) and the weight of it makes my bra fall forward if I bend down. I have found it useful to use some body tape to hold my top in place. I use Eylure tape and I get it from Amazon.
As for coping without a breast Rhodabee, I had a mx one year ago. I tend not to think about it when I am dressed because no one would be able to tell I only have one breast. I do sometimes feel a bit upset when I am getting ready for bed or getting dressed in the morning but I just tell myself it is better to be alive with one breast then not here with two! I am finding it difficult to come to terms with seeing myself as sexually attractive so that is probably what I will have to work on next. I am menopausal and seem to have low sex drive anyway at the moment.
I don’t think I will have a reconstruction because I don’t want more surgery and I just want to get on with my life.
Love
Maude xx
Hi
i have been without a breast for 5 yrs now - at times i DO think about recon, but mostly i am ok _ and my husband appears fine about it too!! When i am dressed i really dont think about it, but i agree that when im in the shower or at “intimate” moments, it is then that my mind wonders what if? I suppose until i am 100% sure, i am best to stay as i am.
Re bras and low fitting tops - i wear bras with pockets in, so even if i bend forward there is no danger of anythng popping out - although i once had an old bra on without a pocket when i was gardening and when i stood up there was my prosthesis on the floor!
Anyway, every one is different, so go with your own instincts, there is no wrong or right way to handle this.
Carol
Hi all
I had a mx in march this year and due to have my recon in June. I am 26 years old and have a complete nightmare finding tops that are not too low, my scar has heeled but surgery was not standard as my scar starts at the armpit and goes down 13 cm in total so swimwear is a nightmare too!!
When i met the plastic surgeon to discuss recon he told me that i have to have a tummy tuck but he is unable to take much fat as i am a size 8, then he has to take away part of my rib, insert a implant and uplift my other breast. Not sure about it all now, seems so drastic!!!
gemma
x
Hi Maude
Thanks for the tip about the eyelure tape, I will look at that in a minute on Amazon.
Hi Carol
I wear a pocketed bras, it’s not the problem of it falling out,but as Maude says the weight of my size 8 pull the bra away from my body. How nice to truthfully say I am a size 8 though!!
LTA
Topperx
Ah, you fine slim ladies! I’m a size 18-20 so they would have plenty of fat to move around. I am waiting to hear in two weeks if I will need Mx (probably) and I feel much happier now about not bothering with the reconstuction stuff, at least for starters. Thanks for this thread, You are helping me get my head round it.
Hi Gemma
I just wanted to say please watch the How to Look Good Naked Tv show as part of your decision making process. It is possible to ‘get away with’ not having a reconstruction as far as your looks in clothes, however you may still decide to go ahead with recon. for other valid reasons.
all the best Wizz
Hi
I have only just discovered this thread. I agree with what many have said. I had a mastectomy in June. I did not want reconstruction as I was told it would involve two ops and a longer recovery period. I would rather have two breasts - but one breast is better than bc. I find my prosthesis is great - I don’t think you can tell which side is real and which is false. I wear bras with pockets and go swimming regularly - wearing a costume with pockets.
Liz
Hi
Only just seen this thread. I’m 47, had mx in june and have felt ok about my body image since. I have accepted the new me! I don’t want to have any more surgery. I like my prosthesis, do lots of sport and still feel feminine. I have a fantastic husband who loves and supports me which helps.
Perhaps see how you get on - you can always have a recon much later on - There’s no need to rush a decision
Might be worth looking on the breast free website, which supports women who decide not to have reconstruction or who are deciding whether or not to opt for recon. Just type in breast free in google and you will find it.
Good luck with what ever you decide
Helen