I was diagnosed with 2nd degree bc in February, single mastectomy in April. I was told I will have chemo and rads due to my age. At my first appointment I raised the issue of fertility unfortunately the hospital forgot to refer me so I am now in the early stages of that process. It seems to be one thing after another with regards to mistakes and delays by the hospital, none of the health care providers are talking to one another and I am constantly being phoned to be the go between about my treatment. After being told we were eligible for funding for the fertility we have now had a letter telling us we will have to pay x amount which we don’t have so it looks like that’s off the table. We have a holiday booked in July for a week in Italy, it is for a friend’s wedding at which I am a bridesmaid. Iv checked my insurance and they won’t cover for cancellation and it cost nearly £2000. I cannot afford to lose that! Iv already lost hundreds on another trip due to the op. The hospital seem to have no problem delaying things if it is there choice so am I within my rights to ask them to wait until after our holiday for chemo start.
I am at my wits end, so please don’t judge me, I just want informed advice/opinions. Thank you!
Hi rosie ree, I’m so sorry to learn of your situation and really do feel for you.
I’m afraid I can’t offer advice on fertility treatment or deferring chemo but I’m sure others, with more experience will advise. I had to cancel a holiday scheduled for last month. My consultant said that ‘advised not to travel on medical grounds’ should only apply from the date of diagnosis, not investigations. However, the insurance company said I needed to provide written proof that I bought the policy BEFORE I received a recall letter following my routine mammogram screening, which I was able to do, and learnt yesterday that the insurance company have agreed to pay out.
I don’t know your circumstances re dates you purchased insurance / was diagnosed but I was prepared to fight the insurance company if needed. I know that may sound silly to some, what with a bigger battle going on with my health but for me it was a point of principle. After all, this is the reason we take out insurance. My husband has access to free legal advice for him and his family and I was prepared to use it.
Of course, my week in the sun doesn’t begin to compare with being a bridesmaid at a friend’s wedding. I honestly don’t know what I would do in your situation. I think I would ask the medical team for an honest opinion regarding the delay in treatment then weigh that against how well you feel, if you could cope with the delay emotionally, and the benefits of attending the wedding / relaxing in the sun.
At the end of the day, it’s only you that can make the decision (it can be a lonely place to be). I’m sorry that my comments aren’t as informed but felt that my experience of holiday insurance may get be of some small help. I’m sure you’ll make the right choice for you and either way, you’ll feel better once a decision is made.
Wishing you the very best. Take care x
Thank you so much for your response!
Its really helpful to know another persons experience. We booked our holiday in August last year and our insurance is on going so wasn’t purchased after the diagnosis. Unfortunatly because we were paying in installments and the balance was paid after the diagnosis they won’t pay us anything.
I am really well in myself (obviously I’m yet to start chemo) I was discharged from the hospital within 24 hours and off paid meds by the third day.
I genuinely feel like I ‘need’ a break or I’m going to break.
I saw a thread about chemo being most effective within 60 days of operation, im of day 54 now and my oncologist appointment isn’t until early July.
Unfortunately I don’t particularly like my oncologist, find him very rude and brash. Perhaps il speak to one of the nurses about it first.
Hi Rosie, I asked for a delay to get a much needed break, best decision for me and husband. Sunny week in algarve. My onc was totally fine. Had lumpectomy and bounced back well after surgery. I think they target on getting you started within two weeks, but mine was happy to change it. Good luck xx
Oh and I asked re fertility too and got a ref. However I didn’t do harvesting eggs as was told being ER+ that wasn’t the best plan. Onc happily told docs to start me on monthly zoladex to shut down ovaries. Its a duck and cover plan b approach, but had first jab on Mon and am doing ok.
Vic55, I will be having the injections so it’s good to hear they aren’t too bad!
I think iv made my mind up that we are going on this holiday, iv never needed to get away so much as now!
Just time to convince the oncologist to delay.
Thank you for your message
No problem Rosie. Oh, tip on zoladex, don’t look at the needle before it goes in. My nurse said she would show me after…def right move. Not that bad being injected but looks a bit week!
Hi Rosie ree, I’m sure you will feel better now you’ve made the decision. Have a fab break, enjoy the wedding and rest. Take care and best wishes x
If you are now on day 54 then you are well past the 60 day date anyway, so I doubt that it will make much difference starting your chemo later on. It is a lot of money to lose and also a special day that is a once in a lifetime event, so go for it! Sometimes you just need to feel “normal”! You could ask for a change on oncologist you know? I am facing chemo for the second time and was at real loggerheads with my first one (female) - my new guy is lovely, so patient and takes so much time to explain treatments etc. With my other one - it was in out and sign on the dotted line! and heaven help you if asked questions! I would speak to your BCN about changing as this one does not sound good at all, and you will probably find that you are not the first person to have changed. Enjoy your sunshine and wedding.
K M xx