Hi, This is my first time in this site. I am 38 years old have a 2 year old son and a wonderful partner. Four days ago our i was diagnosed. All i know so far is that its a grade 3, i have lots of appointments but realy don’t know if i am coming or going. All the jargon is making my head spin
Hi Ferrydene
Firstly, welcome to the forums, I am sorry to read of your recent diagnosis. You may find our helpline useful to call during this confusing time, they can help you through this difficult time, listen to your concerns and offer information, advice and support and will be able to help you by talking you through what may happen over the next weeks and months. They are on 0808 800 6000 and open Monday - Friday, 9am - 5pm, Saturday, 9am - 2pm.
In addition, Breast Cancer Care have published a Resource Pack, it has been designed for anyone newly diagnosed with information to help you better understand your diagnosis, test results and various treatments, it is available via the following link or by contacting the helpline:
breastcancercare.org.uk//content.php?page_id=7514
I do hope you find this information of some help.
Best wishes
Lucy
Hi Ferrydene,
There is such a lot to get your head round at the beginiing it can be quite daunting. How did your diagnosis come about? I was recalled on routine mammogram, had surgery on Nov 14th, and am just finishing radiotherapy next week.
I’m sorry you’ve had to join us on this site, but welcome anyway. It’s fantastic here, you can post any worries or questions and lots good advice and good wishes and support follow.
All the very best and lots of hugs
Jojo
Thanks JoJo
I felt a lump, but had previously had a couple of cysts removed so wasn’t worried. Again they said it was a cyst and drained it. The ultrasonographer said the lining was thick so took 2 biopsies. Consultant said there was nothing to worry about results were back tuesday.
I went on my own for the results and well its been quite a week. I am quite scared and have lots of questions. Am seeing the consultant again tuesday.
Thanks for your support.
Jo x
Dear Jo. I am so sorry that you have had to join us here, and no wonder you are feeling all over the place at the moment. It is particularly tough for you that you went on your own for your results and were not expecting to be told that you had breast cancer. You must really have felt shocked and wondering what on earth to do with yourself, I am so pleased that you have found us here. You will get masses of support and all of us are at slightly different stages, but we all know just how it feels to go through all the emotions that must be hitting you just now. Being scared is completely natural, but once you know what the treatment plan is for you and can start to have the care and treatment you need it is somehow better than this waiting stage. If we can help with any of your questions just post them here and someone will help you out. The specific questions you are thinking about concerning your own situation, do write down to help you remember when you see the consultant, and I am sure you will have a breast care nurse who will give you lots of support. Sometimes at the moment you may be wondering how on earth to get through the day, but you will, and amazingly somehow you will cope with all this, although it is a bit of a roller coaster. You will be in good company, and coming here makes you feel less alone. So glad you have a wonderful partner, and hopefully a supportive family and friends and are getting lots of love and cuddles right now. To be given the news of breast cancer is so devastating, but the treatment is more effective, and the outlook brighter, than ever before. Thinking of you and a big cyber hug. Sarah x p.s have you had a look at the “young women” threads, there you’ll “meet” lots of other women who also have very young children and I am sure you will get extra support from them.
hi jo,
sorry you have had to join us, I think seabird has put into words everything we all want so say wonderfully.
You will receive lots of support on here.
take care
karen x
Hi Jo,
Yes it is a very scary and uncertain time but it does get easier…when you go for your appointment on tuesday have your questions written down and take someone with you, for moral support and also coz it’s difficult to remember everything you’re told.
As Karen and Seabird said you’ll find lots of support here.
Let us know how you get on.
Take care.
Claire
Thanks Seabird, Karen and Claire.
Your words mean alot i already feel your support. I have been on auto-pilot since tuesday but feel that the reality has hit me today. Is it normal to not be able to sleep?
Thanks for all your support. I am glad i have found this forum.
Jo x
Yes dear Jo, it’s normal not to be able to sleep, and to cry, and to wail, and to feel that all of life has caved in on you and that you will never get through this. But you will, I promise. Thank goodness you have a loving partner, and do talk to him about how you are feeling. Never, never feel that you should be “brave” or should cope better than you are, or anything like that. Half the time you will function on auto pilot, but the days will pass. All this is totally, totally normal - you are in shock at the moment, and may well have times coming up when you feel despair, anger, disbelief … all part of what you you will go through - it really is a kind of a grieving process, you are grieving for the well, carefree person that you were just a week ago, and the fact that life will never be quite the same. That does not mean that in the future life won’t be wonderful again, it will, and some people say even more so than before, but it will be different. Having said that, if you really feel that “life is falling apart” at any time don’t hesitate to ask for help from your GP or breast cancer nurse, or call the BCC help line. Some people do really suffer more than others and can find that counselling or other help sees them through. Will be thinking of you on Tuesday, and do keep posting here. Big big hug. Sarah xx
Hi Jo
Sorry to jump in so late but I’ve only just seen your post. I dont think I can add much to what Sarah has said.
Please don’t be scared of all the emotions you are feeling just now - as Sarah says - yes they are perfectly normal. It is a frightening time, and one where I think the worst part is the lack of control - suddenly, there is nothing you can do but wait for other people to call the shots. I know I had many times where I felt my life was in someone else’s control and there was nothing i could do. (I was dx in Nov last year with Grade 3 tumout, 5/11 node involves and HER2+).
However, as you progress through this, and get an idea of the treatment required you slowly regain some of that control, and realise that is is all manageable (granted not pleasant at times but definitiely manageable!!).
The information available from here, by way of the forums and the booklets available has been invaluable to me - things like the resource pack help you to gather your thoughts and guide you though the maze of information available, and help you to ask the right questions of the right people at the right time.
All the very best for Tuesday - will be thinking of you
Margaret x
hi jo
sorry you had to join us, like you i have just been diagnosed 21 jan, so i am going through the same emotions as you dont know whether i am coming or going up and down like a yo yo lots of tears and anger as well. i just turned 40 and have 3 children 19,12 and my youngest is 2, just wanted to say that everyone here have given me lots of answers to my questions and lots of support emotionally.
take care
sharon x
Hi Jo
Sorry you have had to join us but you will get lots of support on here, I was like you and went to my first apt in November 07 on my own as was convinced it was nothing to worry about and wam you have cancer,
I had my lumpectomy on the 10 January and am going back to work on Monday while I wait for the rest of my treatment to start, as others have said you will get through this, I have had my wobbles and have had some bad days but these are a very few now, with the help of this site and my bc nurse I feel I have some control over what is happening and as they say knowledge is power.
Ask any questions you want and someone will give you the answer. I am 42 my children are a lot older than yours 22 and 18 who both live at home and have been so good to me, you have a great partner and a 2 year old son whom I am sure will give you lots of hugs.
Let us know how you go on and take care
Debra x
Hi Jo
I do not post on here a lot , but come in a lot to read the posts. There is not much i can say that has not already been said, but i would just like to tell you that i was diagnosed on the 29th Jan last year, had a lumpectomy , all lymph nodes away followed by chemo and radiotherapy, i remember thinking i will never cope with all this, but sweetheart YOU DO, i can’t believe it was a year ago, as you get so caught up with your treatments etc that the time went past so quick, i just wish that i had found this site much earlier as i think the advice and company is fantastic. I will look in often to see how you are.
Take care xxxxx
Hi Jo,
Sorry I can’t offer you any words of wisdom, as this is my first post here too. I just wanted to say that our stories are v similar, and hopefully sharing our journies will make things a little easier?
My diagnosis was confirmed on 29 Jan, and its also grade 3. I am 37 years old, have a wonderfully supportive partner and a darling 18 month old son. I breastfed until Xmas, and had put my lump down to a normal blocked milk duct, so was completely shocked to be told I’d breast cancer. I’ve just had a sentinel node biopsy, and have a start date for chemo next week. I was given choice of surgery (mastectomy) then chemo or chemo then surgery (poss lumpectomy poss mastectomy?) - that was a decision I didn’t ever want to have to make, but took advice from all the medical staff around me. There is so much to take in, but this site and the forums help loads, as do all the medical staff I’ve met so far - especially my assigned breast cancer nurse.
Take care, and let me know how you get on,
A
x
hi jo
I just got diagnosed on 30th jan this is my first time on site going for bone scan on monday then back to doctors on wednesday i am frightened it my be more bad news but just have to hope it isnt. I have to get one breast removed and a lump out of other hopefully going in on the 15th feb. I have a lovely husband and 3 kids
21,18,and 10. I feel same as you just think i am in a bad dream and going to be woken up in a minute.
take care jackie
Thanks everyone for your kind words.
Well we saw the consultant this afternoon and I think I feel better today! Its amazing how quick you learn about things when you have to. I’m having surgery on the 20th its going to be a lumpectomy and sentinal node biopsy. Then there will be chemo and then radiotherapy. It feels like so much when its written down but knowing more about it makes me feel more in control. My breast care nurse is amazing and today things don’t feel so black. I know its going to be a long and hard road but its just one day at a time
Jo x
Hi Jo and everyone else just joing the “club”.
I was diagnosed on the 29th October and have since had WLE, SNB and am now about to have my third chemo.
When I first joined the site, I was bamboozled by the “BC Jargon” it was like a scary foreign language. At that time one of the lovely ladies, by the name of Margaret posted a list to help people who were newly diagnosed. It really helped me and others at the time.
Here is the “Jargon” buster that helped me so much, I hope it helps you in the same way.
Alopecia
Loss of hair.
Aromatase Inhibitor (AI)
A drug that blocks the action of an enzyme called aromatase which is involved in producing oestrogen.
BC
Breast cancer.
BCN
Breast cancer nurse.
Benign
A growth or lump that is not cancer.
Biopsy
This is used to collect tissue from a lump to be sent for microscopic examination.
CT scan
A CT (Computerised Tomography) scan uses x-rays to produce images of the body.
DCIS
The earliest changes in the breast that can be identified as cancer are called Ductal Carcinoma In-Situ or DCIS and are limited to the ducts of the breast. DCIS often shows up on a mammogram as small, white specks.
DX
Diagnosed.
Fine needle aspiration (FNA)
This is the drawing up a tiny sample of tissue from a lump with a needle and syringe to examine and establish a diagnosis.
Hormone therapy
Hormone therapy is used as a treatment to slow down the growth of some BC cells by lowering the levels of oestrogen and progesterone. One of the most common drugs for this purpose is Tamoxifen. Other hormone drugs are Aromatase Inhibitors (AI).
Invasion
The spread of cancer cells into healthy tissue adjacent to the tumour.
Locally advanced
The cancer has grown but has not spread or metastasised.
Local recurrence
The reappearance of cancer cells at the same place as originally found.
Lumpectomy
The removal of the tumour and some surrounding tissue.
Lymph node
Glands made up of lymphatic tissue to which BC can spread.
Lymphoedema
A collection of fluid in the tissues below the skin, which leads to swelling of a limb or part of the body.
Mammogram
A mammogram is an x-ray of the tissue of the breast. It can reveal changes in the breast before they are noticed by a person.
Metastasis (Mets)
The spread of cancer cells from the breast to another part of the body. The original (or primary cancer) is the breast.
MRI scan
MRI (Magnetic Resonance Imaging) uses radio waves and a magnetic field to scan for tumours.
Oncology
The study and treatment of cancer.
Prognosis
An indication of how a disease will respond to treatment.
Radiotherapy
Radiotherapy (radiation therapy) uses high energy rays, usually x-rays, to kill cancer cells.
Recurrence/Relapse
A return or regrowth of cancer cells.
Remission
The period during which BC is under control.
Stage
The assessment of BC to help plan treatment.
Ultrasound
Ultrasound uses sound waves to produce an image of the breast. It may be used when the results of a mammogram are unclear.
WLE
Wide Local Excision is surgery to remove the tumour together with an area of normal tissue.
Love and hugs to you all,
Dyzee. XXXX
Thanks for that Dyzee,
Its amazing how quick you learn and come to understand the jargon. I am feeling more positive since seeing the consultant but its still one day at a time and i’m up and down during the day too.
Hope everyone is doing ok.
Jo x