Thank you. Emotions are everywhere. xx
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The first few weeks are very overwhelming . It will get easier particularly once your op is done
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It’s so hard at the start . I intended to work until my surgery but had to stop a week earlier as my head was all over the place and I was just so tired. Be really gentle with yourself. I’ve got my oncology appointment to discuss treatment the day of your surgery so I’ll be thinking of you x
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I have had my pre op today. Starting to feel real if that makes sense.
I am working until 31.10 but i am starting to struggle. Working for the NHS does not help.
Thank you for your response and hope all goes well x
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Thanks Chelle. I’m 5 weeks post op tomorrow and although I’m still tiring quickly I’m better than I was 2 weeks ago when I posted. I’m starting to realise what a long haul it is. Today I got the date for my oncology appointment in 2 weeks time and I felt winded. Like a sudden reminder that it’s not over yet.
Hope you’re doing ok x
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I work for you he NHS and I went off sick after my provisional diagnosis . I don’t know what your role is but I’m a Nurse and my head wasn’t in the game . I set the microwave off twice without having put the food in - I wouldn’t have been safe . Take it a day at a time but if you feel you can’t carry on there shouldn’t be a problem getting a sicknote . When you are trying to combine pre- op stuff with work it makes it impossible to compartmentalise . Remember as well that when you return cancer and cancer treatment comes under the Disabilities Act and you will be entitled to reasonable adjustments . Hope everything goes well for you - there’s always someone here if you need to reach out. Xx
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Thank you. I am a discharge facilitator. I am worried i will make a mistake. My head all over the place.
My manager is supportive but they always are when you here lol.
Thanks
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Awwwww Hun we are possibly at similar stages. I had my Oncology consultation last night and it too has made me remember and realise that there’s still a way to go xx Youve got this! Take care @shaz6
Love Chelle xx
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Yes making a mistake was my biggest fear too . One mistake was telling some people that I’d gone for second screening and I couldn’t face being asked if everything was ok. Plus my manager who I had thought of as quite tough reacted very emotionally - I was quite touched but I didn’t feel I could cope with lots of that . I found myself telling her that I was ok and going to be fine - when I didn’t fell ok at all. I also got offered a place on a trial and I put a lot of time and research into deciding whether to take it or not which I don’t think would have been possible if I’d still been at work.
Take one day at a time and if you have the weekend off try to make the most of it and do something nice if you can to give your head your head a break . It’s good that your manager is supportive but if you seem to be ok it’s too easy for them to assume that you are but if you have a chat and say you’re struggling then they may actually decide that it’s better for you to be off . It’s easy to feel guilty about it but you shouldn’t xx
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Hi… I’m 7 months post lumpectomy and sentinel node biopsy and completed radiotherapy in May. Your post was so close to what I came here to say,… everyone seems to expect me to be back to normal that I find myself questioning whether I’m “making a meal” of this cancer recovery lark? I felt like a fraud at diagnosis as my son in law was stage 4 thyroid (spread to larynx, oesophagus, chest and liver, but is now on a drug trial after surgery, RT, and chemo meds and is making
a fantastic recovery), and I knew my prognosis was much more positive than his. I’ve found myself signing up for Macmillan courses just for validation, to hear that others are feeling the same as me. I’m extremely grateful to have found this forum x
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It’s so easy to compare our situations with others, but even if we have a relatively “good” cancer, our bodies don’t understand! All they know is there’s been a trauma and a huge increase in stress, and they react accordingly.
Even though I’m 6 months post radiotherapy, I asked for an accommodation at work to not have to work overtime. My brain is still all over the place and when the fatigue hits, it hits hard. I feel slightly less stressed now that I’ve admitted I need some leniency. I have to keep reminding myself that I’m doing my best. If I could do better, I would. This is the best I’ve got right now, and that’s okay.
Sending love to everyone on the forum! Your strength, vulnerability, and willingness to share is cherished!
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Hi - thanks for sharing that. It’s helpful to get a longer view on things too. I’m slowly recognising just how traumatic it’s all been. And I guess it will continue to be for quite some time. Sending love and strength
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Just in case this is of help to anyone I’m sharing something I did today that helped me enormously.
I wrote down all the days that have been really hard since this cancer journey started from the day I found the lump . I’d realised that I haven’t allowed myself to feel how hard they’ve been because when you’re in it you just have to keep going. But I’m in a lull now between surgery and treatment and I have a hunch that some of my fatigue is from all these unprocessed emotions. And as I wrote about particular days or moments I found myself sobbing. I’ve not really cried at all up to now but this morning it all came out. It was the like the tears I’d held back on all these different days - like the day of the call to say I needed to have an appointment for biopsy results and I knew it wasn’t good news , or the day of surgery - all finally came out. And I was able to recognise how sad or scared or lonely or confusing it had all felt. And although it left me tired it feels different now. I feel like I’ve been real with myself.
Anyway that may not make sense to anyone else but me (!) but I’m glad I finally made space for all the emotions to show up.
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Hi @shaz6
Your post makes 100% sense to me!
I think you have described the toll everything involved with a diagnosis and treatment has on our mental and emotional wellbeing, beautifully
Wishing you all the best with the next stage of your treatment and beyond
Lots of love
AM xxxx
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Makes sense to me @shaz6 and you are quite right when you’re in the middle of treatment you don’t really think about it too deeply because you just can’t afford to and your energy is going into physical recovery and trying to keep yourself focussed on the next thing - so you store a lot of it . Well done for having the courage to let yourself be with it and let it come out . I’m sure this will help you feel better in yourself and may well help someone else as well . Xx
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We have the same surgery date! Best of luck with it and I hope you’re feeling as ok as can be in the run up