Feeling huge

Hi All

Am feeling a little depressed this evening. I was supposed to go out for a friend’s birthday drinks, and could have done with it as my surgery is on Tuesday… last chance to go out for a little while. But I tried to find something to wear and everything just made me look so fat! I’m only 9.5 stone but that’s about 3/4 stone heavier than usual and my stomach looks pregnant!

What can I do to lose some weight? I don’t want to sound like someone who is that bothered by weight, but my frame is so small that the ball around my middle looks so odd! It starts from under my boobs (still there til Tuesday!) and just looks so weird and misshapen.

Cecelia. x

Hi Cecelia

I am sorry to hear that you are feeling depressed and can completely sympathise with you. When I first discovered my lump I couldn’t eat or sleep and lost loads of weight. I’m also small only 5 foot 2 inches and my weight went down to around 7 1/2 stone. Now it has gone right up and more and I think it’s to do with the chemo and steroids and also the fact that I’m not doing as much as I used to. My trousers all feel tighter and it makes me feel really depressed. No hair on my head, eyebrows really thinned, same with eye lashes and I sometimes just feel horrible about myself. I hate it when my clothes feel tighter makes me so miserable. I’m trying to do a bit of exercise here and there as want to get myself as fit and healthy as possible before my operation in 1 1/2 weeks time.

It is still early in the evening so you can still change your mind about going out. I’m sure you’ll look great in your clothes and with a touch of make up and some nice accessories everybody will be looking at your face and not your body and after all 9.5 stone is not heavy anyway like you say.

I know it’s hard to make you feel better about yourself but don’t be hard on yourself - you’re going through a tough time and a bit of extra weight is probably a good thing as opposed to a bad thing. I told a few friends today I was feeling fat and frumpy and they both laughed at me and said “you’re so tiny” they couldn’t even see I had put weight on and one of my friends who said this really speaks her mind so I know she was being honest about it.

I hope what I have said has helped a little and I know a lot of women on this website have talked about gaining weight whilst on chemo so we’re not the only ones and like I said don’t be hard on yourself and I hope you change your mind about going out tonight.

RebzAmy xxx

Thanks RebzAmy

I can’t go out, I’ve tried everything and don’t feel good wearing anything. Which is a shame as I know my skin looks great, as everyone keeps telling me… ! And my wig does look particularly good tonight, having just been washed!

But my trousers feel tight, dresses don’t hold me in and nothing feels very comfortable.

I know this is temporary, I just wish I could have had one last night out with my friends before my surgery and I think, as you say, no-one would have noticed but I just don’t feel good.

Any tips on how to get rid of this big tum after my surgery are very welcome.

I hope all you gals have had a good evening, hope some of you got out tonight.

Cecelia. x

Hi Cecelia

You sound like you’ve made up your mind to stay in and like I said above I completely understand as the jeans I’m wearing tonight used to be very loose and now they’re feeling almost uncomfortably tight and I hate that feeling. I’m not feeling that good about how I look or feel. I think the most important thing when it comes to weight is to keep yourself active and busy - I make sure I’m out and about everyday (I’m not working so being a lady of leisure). It would be very easy for me to sit about thereby gaining weight. I’ve also chucked out most sweets and chocolates as it’s so easy to pick when you’re bored.

Anyway I’m off out now and really hoping that everything goes well for you next week and will be thinking of you.

Rebz xx

Elastic waists are not just for ‘oldies’. You can get really trendy clothes still but they are so comfortable. With the long tops that are in fashion now they hide a multitude of sins. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself re the weight . Once you get the confidence to step out that will give you more exercise.

Norma XX

I went from skinny marie…to beached whale lol. I piled on the weight through chemo…but figured that in the grand scheme of things id sort that later. It was annoying and clothes that were comfy were a nightmare. So figured instead of cutting off circulation with my jeans…just went the next size up. As chemo went on…the chemo bloat really kicked in…its weird going from flat tumm to 11 months pregnant in a space of a few hours. I lived in my baggy tracksuit bottoms on those days. It only lasted for a week…but it was enough. When I started the rads the weight started to come off, plus i was doing a lot more. On finishing the rads i was more or less back to normal, doing all the school runs and nursery runs every day, taking the dogs for walks and tackling the housework with a vengence. So far ive lots over 2 nd half stone in the last 10 weeks, so its coming off. Im almost back at my pre-diagnosis weight…but in the grand scheme of things i try not to let it get to me.

Like that pre-diagnosis weight. Usually pre-children weight!

lol…pre-children weight…well that was a dream that went out the window a looooooooooooong time ago lol. Im down to 9st 10…so just a few more pounds to go…but to get to 8st 4, before having kids…yeah cos thatll happen lol

Ah, thanks for the kind words everyone. I have bought a dress (patterned which hides a multitude of rolls!) and some leggings today which thankfully are comfy and don’t show my huge belly so much.

So thanks for the encouragement.

Cecelia. x

Hi Girls,
Know the feeling re the tight trousers. I kept undoing the top of the zip when i was in the house, as I was so uncomfortable, then suddenly realised what i looked like when my OH came in! Now wearing some looser skirts with boots. Hoping it’ll come off post-chemo when I’m running around again.
Thinking about burning calories - I’ve had some days when I have a bit of energy, and get a real urge to sort the house out (has been totally neglected for 6 months since diagnosis). I’ve been putting all my anger at this bl@**y disease into turfing out cupboards and chucking stuff away, which must be burning up some calories?
I do think we have to not be too hard on ourselves, and give in to it for a time. There’ll be time later for putting on the lycra and getting in a sweat!
I’m so glad you found an outfit you feel good in, Cecelia.
I think you should go shopping again next weekend…
love Jacquie