It probably ISN’T breast cancer going by percentages I know…yet I’m still absolutely petrified!
I found my lump relatively recently, 4wks ago on the Thursday night before the first bank holiday weekend in may, and just so happened it was the night before we went away to my sons football tournament. I’d been looking forward to it sooo much! Weather was meant to be lovely (which it was) and I couldn’t wait to get to know everyone a little better. I had a nice long soak in the bath and was putting some gorgeous smellys on that my daughters had bought me at Christmas, and all of a sudden it was there. At first I just thought it was a bump after packing suitcases for the four of us and lugging them downstairs, but I guess I’m not alone when I say that once I felt it, I just knew, it wasn’t ‘normal’. I asked my partner to have a feel and he felt it too. He said I should try not to worry,enjoy the weekend, and we’d go to see the Dr when we got back.
We had a lovely weekend and yes I did worry and when I couldn’t feel the lump anymore,after numerous checks, I assumed that it was a cyst that had dispersed. However, when I got home and was bathing there it was just as big as ever (it’s about the size of a 50p coin) and I realised being quite ample that I’d been trying to feel it with my bra on and as its in the centre,obviously there was no way I would feel this way.
So I made my appointment at the drs sharpish and he examined me… did any of you,like me, think maybe it was all in your head and they wouldn’t feel anything? My doc felt around for a grand total of 3 seconds and told me he could feel ‘quite a large mass’ (cheers doc), and said he was going to book me in for a mammo and ultrasound. He asked me if the spots around my nipples had been there long, a couple of months by my reckoning but I just put them down to blocked ducts, and then he preceded to book the appointment there and then! Now the thing with my doctors is they would just print off a piece of paper with a couple of passwords and normally ask you to book it yourself, so him doing it there and then was kind of strange but the upside of that was I only have 7 more sleepless nights before my appointment next Thursday. Since then Im more aware of soreness in my armpit and an ache just behind my shoulder blade. Did any other ladies feel this?
Anyway, that’s my story, I hope I haven’t bored anyone too much, it’s just I don’t really know many people I can confide in as I’m fairly new to the area I live in and if I speak to my lovely partner he’ll know I’m worried and start to worry himself which is NOT what I want.
I spoke to a wonderful lady on the helpline who suggested I had a look on here and well…here I am.
To all those ladies who are going through this my thoughts are with you all, you are so brave xxxx
Hi Wittybee,
I won’t say ‘try not to worry’ because I know that is impossible. I think with any lumps that doctors like to refer you quickly, and this is a good thing in a way.
The waiting is the worst and your mind will start to wander. A lot of cases do turn out to be harmless and I hope this is the case for you.
Your body does react to stress and tension, which can cause aches and pains.
Remember that we are all here as and when if needed.
Take Care
Faye
Hi wittybee
sorry you find yourself in this awful waiting period.
just to reassure you slightly, if poss, my doc must have been trained by the same one who trained yours! She made it so obvious that it was a worry! But at least you get seen quicker and get answers quicker this way.
please take someone with you to the appointment. I went on my own…!
in the meantime, remember that whatever happens, this is just a chapter in your life.
wishing you well
rachel.
I had skin changes but no lump and when I went to my doctors, he thought it was shingles! Thankfully, my husband wasn’t satisfied and took me off to the A & E dept where I was lucky enough to be seen by one of the surgeons who’s deals with bc - he booked me into the clinic the week after and the rest is history! All this happened exactly 12 months ago and this time last year I was in exactly the same place you are now - I was soooooooooooo terrified and spent the whole of the Jubilee bank holiday weekend crying. But, devasting as it was when I found out it was breast cancer, I’ve got through the treatment and although I know that it’s always in the back of my mind, it’s as though it’s happened to someone else. Hopefully you’ll find that yours is nothing to worry about, but if you do end up getting news you wished you hadn’t, it doesn’t have to be the end of the world and you’ll feel so much better when there’s a treatment plan in place - I actually looked forward to starting my chemo 'cos I knew it was the beginning of the end for this vile disease! Sending positive vibes that you get good news x
I know some doctors don’t have the usual bedside manner but sometimes it can be a blessing. Imagine if they have said to you oh no I am sure it’s only a cyst and it turns out to be BC. Harder to deal with. I know you are scared but once you come through the waiting game even if its not the news you hoped for you will feel better (I promise) and there are lots if women on here for support and we have all walked in your shoes. Please try not to worry too much, whatever it is its treatable and there is always a solution. Let us know how you do x
Hi I have an indentation on the outside of my left breast and a lump above it. I went to my gp and she is referring me and she said I should be seen within a fortnight. I am so scared as i have fibroadenoma in my right breast before but this feels different fixed if you know what I mean. I am trying not to think about it and keep busy but it is very hard. My gp said the lump feels smooth and looking on the sites this is a good sign right? I only seen the doctor on Tues and I keep waiting for the postman to deliver my apt letter. Not sleeping well at the moment.
So sorry I haven’t got back to you ladies sooner but I’ve been trying to keep my mind off it by keeping myself busy, on the plus side my house is all nicely redecorated now lol.
Faye, I understand completely what you mean about the aches and pains, I suffer with osteoarthritis and fibromyalgia so I’m used to symptoms cropping up from time to time, in fact, that’s how I became aware of it because it was different to others I have had previously. The attractive cold sores that have developed over the last couple of days on my lower lip I will definitely put down to being stressed though! Thankyou for your kind words xx
Rara, my appointment is in the morning (11.15) and my partner Dave is coming with me. I’ve had the not so nice task of telling a few people close to me about what is happening as I felt they would take it badly if it is bc and I dropped a bombshell on them. I appreciate now, 2 weeks on, my doc telling me straight but it was just a shock as I did genuinely believe he would say it was all in my head. Fingers crossed I have a negative result tomorrow! Xx
Witchy, that’s exactly how I’ve been, Fine one minute, bawling my eyes out the next. I try to tell myself that there’s no point in worrying about it til I know but it doesn’t make it any easier does it! I’m so pleased to hear that you have recovered and pray that it stays that way for you xx
Carrie, Thankyou. I called the helpline before joining the online forum and I was in such a state I didn’t even catch the lady’s name but she was lovely explaining to me what to expect when I go to my appointment. Then she mentioned about the forum and at first I just browsed the topics and was overwhelmed by the support you all give to people in this awful predicament. I will most definitely give you an update after my appointment xx
Maggie, I’m in exactly the same shoes as you honey, only my doctor made my clinic appointment there and then. My lump doesnt feel smooth at all (the surface of it actually feels bumpy, like strechmarks under the skin and is quite large and fixed). I’m praying they tell me that its a cyst, muscle tissue, anything but bc.Keep yourself busy, if you can’t sleep, like me, keep some jobs by for during the night, I’ve also been reading THE most boring books known to man hoping that it would make me drop off! Hope you get your appointment through soon xx
Thanks for all your responses ladies, you don’t know how much picking these up today have helped. In the words of Doris Day Que sera sera! Xxx
Good luck with your appointment. Hopefully you will get good news. Xx
Thank you xx
Hi Maggie, I hope you’ve heard something by now. I found a lump on may 11th, that was a long saturday night through sunday before I could see my gp on monday. I found it stressfull just waiting to hear so decieded to chase up my appointment. I ask my doctors receptionist where I had been referred and after 5 phone calls I got through. My appointments today, so fingers crossed it all goes well, and if not then it has to be dealt with so here goes. Hope this might help xx
Hi, I have just joined this forum and strangely enough its so true, we all think we’re alone going through this, but its so untrue. I am amazed how supportive it feels knowing I can come on here and not feel so issolated. I have also felt that telling my closest was the best thing as if it does turn out to be bc, thats a bigger bomb shell to drop. Im a loan worker (as Im a meter reader, so dont see the same people everyday), I live on my own as husband works away and kids grown up. We speak everyday practically, but I’ve found it easier that way as its not a topic of conversation…well my 18year old chihuahua as deaf as a door post looks like he listens…bless him. I found my lump may 11th and my appointment is today at 1.55pm, thankfully a neighbour of years passed is coming with me. Its been a long time coming, one minute I talk myself into its ‘definately a cyst’ and the next Im ‘no it could be bc’. I’ve kept myself busy thankfully, and now I have to work this morning before my appointment. Obviously Im hoping for the best and preparing for the worst…but as I’ve said whatever it is I have to deal with it. Thankyou for giving me the opportunity to say all this. Hope you all get your appointmens soon and good luck with them xx
I’ve been exactly the same Suzie, but either way, by the end of the day we should both know something, my appointment is at 11.15, good luck I will keep my fingers crossed for you x
Hi Ladies, Just wanted to say Good Luck to both of you today I’ve got my appoinment at 12.30pm but have already been told it’s likely to be BC:( I’m at work also before my appoinment as couldn’t face staying at home thinking about it, anyhow good luck
x
Good luck to you Cazzer hun, let us know how you get on, I should be leaving in about an hour for my appointment, scary times xxx
Thanks WittyBee I will let you know, seeing a specialist to discuss treatment but don’t think i’ll be taking anything in! I’ll keep everything crossed for you
xx
Thanks…Forgot to add, the names Belinda xx
No worries, my name is Caroline Good Luck xx
Well had a triple assessment, they took 3 core biopsies, didn’t tell me a thing and told me I will get the results next week…an other week of sleepless nights. I will say that the mammogram wasn’t half as bad as what I thought.
Fingers crossed for some good news off someone today!
Hi Belinda and all other lovely ladies, Sorry i didn’t respond yesterday, spent last night taking in all the information passed to me at the hospital. I have a Grade 3 Tumour Non Hormone fed, but apparantly this is quite usual for my age (42) lucky me i feel so special! I will be starting 8 sessions of Chemo within the next 2 weeks to try to shrink the tumour before surgery in the hope that i won’t have to have a masectomy, although to be honest think i would rather get rid of them both now! Still feel numb and can’t quite take this in, i feel absolutely fine so how can i have cancer??? It’s crazy and watching my son whose 23 look so terrified is making me feel worse, although i know he is trying his best to be positive. I really can’t see any light at the end of the tunnel at present, have the CT and MRI to look forward to, i’m convinced it’s spread even though my specialist says they aren’t expecting to find anything, it doesn’t make me feel any better though. I’m in work and feeling sorry for myself today, the thought of being at home thinking of what is going to happen especially Chemo is terrifying:( I had the Triple Assessment Belinda but i was told before i left that they were sure it was cancer, this will hopefully be good news for you, i have my fingers crossed for you
I hope you all manage to find some light today
xx
Hi
I found a lump a few months ago in my left breast and went to the docs (eventually) who sent me for referral to the consultant whom I saw on Wednesday, they did a mammogram which found that there was calcification (v.micro) and a mass in my right breast (my left one is fine!). On having the ultrasound they decided to take a needle biopsy of the mass in my right breast. The doc said probably nothing to worry about and could be a lymph node in my breast although unusual to have one where it is.
I am not thinking I have cancer but I am scared as I went with a problem in my left and it is absolutely fine and they have found something I didn’t even realise was there in my right and I am very scared right now, the family history isn’t great and there is alot of breast cancer in my mother’s side and fathers! The other thing that is a worry is that I had a mammogram 3 years ago due to another lump which thankfully turned out to be a cyst and there was no calcification present then or mass.
Trying not to worry until I get the results which won’t be until next week at the earliest as the consultant said they have to meet as a team and review the mammogram/ultrasound and results of the biopsy.