Have joined the club

I have joined the club-2wks ago a chance xray for my disc problem revealed my right leg was 1/5th cancer and hip and femur on point of fracturing.went straight into hospital had scans etc and 8days ago had major surgery to stabilize the femur.came home monday and seen oncologist today and will be having 5 radiotherepy sessions on my leg had my hormone changed and will after radiotherepy start the bone building drug.l also have a small area on top of my right arm.He says l have a 20-30% chance of being here in 5 yrs.
Everything has happenend so quickly-am 2 mths off 5yrs from diagnosis so really had begun to think l was one of the lucky ones.My initial tumour was a grade 3 sggressive 3.2cm -no lymph involved.Mood swings from positive to despair with disbelief thrown in.Is this normal-and how do l get some normality back?

Taffy - what an awful shock for you…am so sorry…it must be particularly hard when you were approaching the all-important five years.

You will get heaps of support here and come across girls who have (and continue to do so) beat what the medical experts have said.

Give yourself time to come to terms with things…

Cyber hugs to you.

Taffy I am so sorry to read your news. I think you are one of those who first responded to me when I joined bcc in 2005. I remember so well how gutted I felt when I had gone 5 years from original dx and thought I was out of the woods! How long had you been treated for a disc problem before someone made the connection with 2ndary bone mets???

I think the swings from positive to despair with disbelief thrown in sounds pretty normal to me - and yes as you start to adjust to the news you didnt want to hear you do find a new norm and in time can cope quite well with it. I have been fortunate even with extensive bone mets since 2002 that I have had so little pain. That has changed this past year so I am having to make adjustments to that now.

Have pm’d you so do check your inbox.


So sorry to hear your news and how devastating to get so close to that 5 yr point and find that.
It makes me so angry that these GPs treat women who have previous history of bc for back/joint problems and don’t investiagte it for secondary spread.
I think when you first hear the word ‘secondary’ it feels as if you are days from death and it is impossible to think properly and rationally as it is such a shock. What you are feeling is no different to how others have felt and hopefully we can all support you here through the forums.
You have a treatment plan which I think helps you to focus on what is going to happen and that helps as then you feel something is being done to help.
Give yourself plenty of time and try to treat yourself whilst you are adjusting to the news. Some people want to tell their friends and relatives and others want to keep it to themselves for the time until they feel they can deal with it.
I don’t know how old you are or if you have children or have contact with children but they often know something is wrong so you need to tell them some sort of truth about it returning but you’re having treatment etc. The media is so full of what has happened to Jade Goody and Wendy Richards, that they will have picked up that message cancer can kill quickly so you need to explain what is different about yours - especially when you look at Dawnhc as an example of secondary spread to the bones.
The rads I’ve had often make the pain worse worse for about a week before it gets better and then i found it was 4-6 weeks after treatment that I could feel the benefit rather than thinking ‘what have I done to cause this extra pain?’
Keep posting and we’ll all here for you.

I am so sorry too that I hear yeat another story of neglect/ I was neglected 1st time round with my breast cancer - its only a cyst I was told. By the time I found out it was cancer the tumour was 13cm and I needed chemo BEFORE the mastectomy. Exactly 4 years on I am being diagnosed with liver and bone tumours. I had been treated at another practice (I moved house in JUlY) for a bad back - i was told it was musculor and was on an excercise bike on christmas eve crying as I could hardly move with a physiotherapist. By new years day I was having 3 1/2 liters of fluid drained off my lungs knowing that I had secondary breast cancer. My gp was hopeless! Isn’t it sad that we don’t get sent of rtests automatically?!


I am sorry to hear that you have joined the club that no one wants to join as we have always said. It must have been an awful shock. my profile is a bit similar to yours - 4 1/2 years after diagnosis, (like you Stage 2A) I only had the haziest idea that something could be wrong and then liver and bone secondaries, apparently out of nowhere. Its an awful shock, but you do learn to live with it and go on…I am still working and still doing things with my family despite 2 rounds of chemo. Do you know which bone strengthener you will be on?

Molster -thats really unbelievable that your GP could be so dense…it never fails to amaze me the stories that you hear on this forum, I am sorry you have liver and bone tumors(like me). I hope you have a treatment plan sorted out and that you have a good oncologist.


Thanks fo replying Katherine. Iam am not well enough for work. The chemo I am on is Xeloda or capecitabine and the bone strengthener is Zometa. I am feeling so sick at the moment and cant’ eat - a realy physchological issue - I am even going to try hypnotherapy next week it is so bad. any advice? I am on my 3rd cycle of tablets and I feel really poorly x

Hi Molster

Sorry to hear you’re feeling so bad. Have you contacted your medical team as I’m sure they’ll be able to help you. If you need someone to talk to in confidence then the staff on the helpline here are only too willing to support you. Don’t suffer in silence.

Kind regards,
Jo, Facilitator


There are several anti-nausea medications you can try. I have been through a load in order to find one that helps me. I now take Levinan (Levomepromazine)when going through a bad patch and Cyclizine when needed. I have suffered from loss of appetite and nausea and lost a lot of weight.

I have a community nurse assigned to me from the local hospice. I have found she has the best expertise regarding anti-nausea. Your GP should be able to arrange this support if available in your area. Also as said in a previous post, I would talk to your oncologist about this…

Hope things improve for you.

I have just joined today. I have been up all night worrying and crying. I was diagnosed two days ago and will have surgery on Tuesday. I can’t sleep, I can’t eat and I am having massive difficulty controlling my emotions. I feel like I have been propelled into a nightmare. Can anyone help me to sort myself out


Welcome to the forums, I’m sure other users will be along to support you soon.
In the meantime you may find it useful to contact our free helpline on 0808 800 6000, opening hours are Monday to Friday 9.00 – 5.00 and Saturday 9.00 – 2.00

Best wishes
June, moderator

Hi Pol50,
We have all been where you are at at the moment and its horrible!! Your head will be all over the place, but believe me it will get better! Try very hard to take one day at a time, surgery sounds frightening but you will find its not that bad after all, everything always sounds worse than it is!!Do try to remember that.
Good luck with your treatment, do let us know how you get on.
Chin up,
Take care,