help- i'm trying to be positive

hi- i’m new to this,never dun owt like this b4 and honestly dint want to b doin it mums bin diagnsd wiv bc and had masctmy jus over 3 wks ago.we wnt 4 follow up appntment 2day and i was stupidly hoping that they mite give her a course tabs or sumthng, but she has to hav chemo,radiotherapy,hepcin? and then tabs.i,m trying to be strong 4 her and 4 everyone else, am despratly reading everything i can find and i,m trying to remain calm and postive. no one today gave me any positive news. we have to wait now for 2 scans to check that the cancer isnt anywer else. can anyone offer any ideas as to how to keep us all sane in the nxt couple of weeks?

Hi Dora, so sorry at your mums news - if you read thru some of the comments on here, what mum has been offerred treatment wise is perfectly normal. I am on second lot of chemo and will get radio therapy then a drug called Tamoxifen which sounds like something similar to your mum - my docs words were “you will see your grandchildren grow up” as I am 48 I am taking it that its not gonna see me off anytime soon! BC is very very treatable - its a rotten journey but I am finding it all bearable - glad mum has your support, she will need you there for her but try not to panic - please keep in touch if you need to xx

Hi Dora,

In addition to the support you have received from your fellow user you may find the BCC resources pack helpful. It has been designed for those newly diagnosed and is filled with information to help you and your Mum better understand her diagnosis, test results and the various treatments available. If you would like to order a copy just follow the link below:-

Our helpline is open 9am-5pm weekdays and 9am-2pm on Saturdays, please call if you feel it would help to talk your concerns through with someone in confidence on 0808 800 6000.

Best wishes

hi dora,

so sorry you and your family have to go thru’ this. you ask for advise well the first thing is you are already doing it… being there for you mum is exactly what she needs and coming on sites like this one is just what you need. the more info you get and understand the less scary it is. i had chemo, mastectomy and radiotherapy - no herceptin - last year. the way i coped, among other things, was to have something in the diary to look forward to. things to do when the treatment would allow… visiting friends, days out with my family, i went to see loose women being filmed once (free tickets on line),cinema etc… maybe you could do this for your mum… nothing complicated or pricey just something she likes doing.

the other thing is to keep yourself strong and keep living your life, i don’t know about your mum but it really helped me to see my boys getting on with things and enjoying life… i hated the anxiety my illness gave them. try as a family to be as open as possible and not hide your feelings it is such a pressure to be happy all the time.

well don’t know if this helps but please remember that all that is happening is normal… not good but normal and do-able, i am living proof of that.

well done for asking and keep on asking and let us know how things go on. give my love to your mum and tell her she is blessed to have such a wonderful daughter,



Hi Lenny
Thanks for ur comments.It really helps to hear from sumone who is living with bc.I’v been doin sum readin up,keeping myself busy and walking as that keeps me sane(as well as helping with the waistline!)Thanks again for replying,take care,I’m sure we’ll talk again soon.

dora x