Hi, new to forum

Blueanne17 you are certainly not a fraud. It sounds like you want to protect everyone else from your cancer. They need to know how you really are. They can’t help you if they don’t know. I think ‘The lion in the fridge’ sums up everyone’s cancer.


Yes @isitreallyme re the Lion in The Fridge it does. I just wanted to say to @blueanne17 - with what you are dealing with you are a brave lady . It can be hard to deal with people who don’t understand - some people’s ideas about cancer seem to be that either you are really ill ( and bearing it bravely ) or you’re getting better and should be grateful for that. There doesn’t seem to be much in between , sometimes there’s too much curiosity , other times people can get emotional . I’ve said "I’m fine I’m lucky " sometimes while not really feeling it because I knew it was true and felt it was expected of me but sometimes like you it was to forestall further questions or judgement . I had enough trouble managing my emotions let alone anyone else’s and a couple of times people said “Think positive " to me. When my Dentist said it I gritted my teeth and " Thank you I’ll do that " When my friend said I nearly but her head head off with " well my Mum died and now I’ve got cancer would you feel positive about that ?” . She’s a lovely person actually , and she wasn’t judging me she just thought it was the thing you were supposed to say in the circumstances - and we are still good friends .

It’s hard when you aren’t at your best to differentiate between who is being judgemental or inappropriately nosy and who literally doesn’t know what to say and is relying what they have heard is the right thing to say . Saying you are fine does help avoid complications but if people really care and you do put them straight it won’t be the end of the world.
I really hope you are getting good support with the seroma - you could try asking the Nurses about it or searching in here for support from others that have had this problem . I appreciate that you’re concerned about your husband but I do think you would feel less lonely if you told him - my partner was in a bit of denial about the whole thing to begin with. In a few weeks maybe the Moving Forwards course might be helpful - it did help me last year.

With love
Joanne. X

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Thank you, Joanne, for your support. I had the seroma drained four times and it’s now clearly getting better every day. Unfortunately, I have now been referred to have the right breast checked again. I don’t think it is anything serious neither does my GP but it should be checked. Probably a side effect of the Anastrozole. What people do not realise is that everything becomes a possible problem. It changes your whole life. I am less stressed than I was and sleeping better than I have in a long time. I now know that I can cope with whatever happens. I went for a flu jab today and got a COVID booster as well. They are not injected into the same arm. I had to say that I am being treated for breast cancer and the COVID booster was injected into my leg. I did not feel uncomfortable mentioning the cancer or upset. It is now part of who I am.

I hope those who have declared feeling guilty in this discussion realise they should feel proud to be coping with whatever is thrown at them. You are all unique. No two cases are the exactly the same. Best wishes to those waiting for results.