I know this is probably going to sound really daft - but I cant get my head round my situation. I had a WLE in December - and last week I was told that they are happy they got it all and my margins were clear. I am having rads in the next few weeks and am on Anastrozole for 5 years. So - am I a cancer patient? a cancer survivor? Do I have breast cancer - or DID I have bc? Am i now an ex cancer patient? Im sorry if this sounds mad - but I dont know what I am. Im obviously over the moon that they got it all away - but it has left me feeling a bit in limbo - because Ive got the rads coming up. I know a lot of women on here are in a much worse situation - and I apologise for taking up your time - but it is just very important to me to know what ‘category’ I should regard myself as!
a confused Kaj
xxxxx
I think that in your situation I would regard myself as a cancer patient, - even if the treatment is preventative - until active treatment/rads are over.
My nodes were clear, so despite having to have chemo and rads, I use the past tense - I’ve had BC.
I don’t like ‘cancer survivor’ - just a bit melodramatic for my taste. That’s a very subjective, personal preference though - I didn’t like wearing scarves either!
I’m on tamoxifen, which is preventative, rather than curative - so I don’t bother to classify that.
However, the terms I use do seem to vary - depending on my mood that day and who I’m talking to!
Interesting topic - look forward to others views.
Dx
I think this is one we all have to work our over and again. I am told that officially I am still a cancer patient until I am discharged by the hopsital (because of where I am, and the follow up I have been told I’ll get, presumably for ten years). I never know which tense is appropriate (and haven’t changed my ‘status’ on here as a result of that), but I am happy to describe myself as NED - No Evidence of Disease.
As DJ says, I think it probably varies from day to day according to how we feel… mostly I feel well and content with life. I also dislike the term survivor, but that’s just me!
Daysie is right, you are still you, and that’s what really matters.
I think there is a difference between being a patient (i.e. not being discharged) and describing oneself as “having bc”. At the moment I’m NED (but am not discharged and have no idea when I will be, if at all). But at the same time I don’t like to say I “have had” bc because in my particular situation (grade 3, lymph nodes invoved , recurrence, ER+, Her2+) I feel that is not quite right. (I’m a bit sensitive about it all today, had my routine appointment with the onc, which always makes me feel very much like a cancer patient! Still NED though, thank goodness!). I’ve just visited my profile here to see if there is a “NED” box to describe myself, but there isn’t, and it won’t let me type in “NED”.
I usually tell people (if I need to) that I’ve had treatment for BC and am “Ok at the moment”, which feels about right to me. People can interpret that as they want.
It would be good to have a box on my profile to accurately describe myself though.