How will I cope

Recently found a large lump in my breast, appointment next week but don’t no how I will cope alone. Lost my husband last year, two young children, not many friends or family around. Had a roller coaster year of ups and down and don’t no how I can get through this without upsetting the children again. Just cant stop crying.

Bubbles, I’m sending you a massive hug.

Waiting is a horrible time and your mind can go into overdrive with worry.

Not all lumps turn out to be cancerous but it is only natural to expect and fear the worst - human nature unfortunately.

The helpline are very good here and I’m sure there’ll be lots of other ladies along to give you some support and guidance at what truly is the worst possbile time in ‘the waiting room’, we know because we’ve all been through there too, so can completely understand where you head and emotions are right now. It will get easier once you’ve had your appt and you know what you’re dealing with, if there is anything to deal with.

If there is something for you to ‘get through’, you will and you will surprise yourself. There will also be lots of virtual support on here, and people who are in a similar position and situation to you, so rest assured, you’re not alone. This site has been a godsend for me over the past 6 months and I hope you continue to post, ask any question (no such thing as a silly question here) or just rant and share.

I hope you manage to get through this testing time and fingers crossed for your appt next week.

Bev x

Bubbles you poor thing waiting is such torture. Please please remember 9 out of 10 lumps are benign. Do ring the Helpline they are so supportive and it would be good to speak to somebody who can go through everything with you. You have had such traumatic time and this is the last thing you need. I would love to be there for you you need a hug. Take somebody with you if you can. Hopefully you will leave with a smile. Two heads are better than one when stressed a trying to take on board what people are saying. Hopefully you will not need the forums after your clinic appointment. But if you do you will find everybody so helpful
Crossing everything for you
The number for the Helpline is 0808 8006000.
Virtual Hug

morning Bubbles,

Sun is shinning and you will be soon, when you get your results.

we are all here for you as we are having same worries, yep we have our tearful days but then i remember what i heard on tv last week about this treatment with electrodes what great things they are finding for us to try this has kept me on a positive line.

Take all the support you can find i also lost my hubby so i know how you are feeling, i look at his photo tell him i am NOT joining him yet life is for living and we have to fight the gremlins, talking through your worries on here helps a lot.

Keep in touch Pat

just to say that i was where you are now on May 11th. Found a lump and booked an appointment. Came on here and read that 9 out of 10 lumps are benign, but still went on reading about wigs, and things to stop your fingernails falling off. I reasoned that someone has to be the unlucky 1 in 10 dont they?. It was such a surreal time going through the tests and waiting for results.

I do hope you are back here next week saying your lump is benign. But even if it does turn out you need treatment, it will be disruptive but it will be do-able. And you might be like me. It had not spread to my nodes, so i just needed a lumpectomy and 4 weeks of rads. It is now 5 months since I found that lump and appart from the occasional episode of radiation fatigue and a slightly dark and battered boob,everything is back to how it was before. The operation was easy to recover from, despite how rubbish anasthetic makes me, no real pain. My skin did not break down with the radiation, and the hot boob was not bad enough to take pain killers. So I could have don without all this, the treatments take time and disrupt your life, but it is nothing like i was imagining in May.

you do not say how old the children are. Have you said anything at all to them about your worries

Bubbles. Crackles makes some very good points, so do all the other ladies. It’s impossible not to worry, so you may as well accept that fact! You and your children have been through such a trauma loosing your husband which may have had an effect on your body-hence lumps and bumps in places they shouldn’t be. Hopefully you’ll soon be telling us that everything is ok. Give yourself a big hug from me.xx

Hi there Oldanddumpy and all,

Can i ask how long after lumpectomy did you get your results and start rads. i have another biopsy on tumor on back this week
before op on 13th.

Things take such a long time, i have no patience just cant make out why it takes so long for our results.
I need to plan as i have a holiday let to sort out.

Keep pecker up all of you
cyber hugs xxx Pat

Big thank you to everyone that posted notes, kids are 11 and 14 and still not over the death of their father so at the moment keeping this to myself. Big hugz to everyone :smiley:

i got my results 2 weeks after my op.I think that is the norm.After you get your results and details of what type of treatment you need you have to wait for an appointment with the oncologist to find out your treatment plan and to get it in the diary. I asked them to delay radiation until six weeks later because i had an important gig and i did not want to be sufferering from fatigue on that one. glad i did because I have been tired and it has affected how i play on recent gigs.

I think they like to wait a certain time anyway so that the scar is healed before they start rads.

We had a holiday to plan and my husband was impatient to get it in the diary, But I did not know wether i would need chemo or not and so we held off. then when i knew I did not need chemo we just have not got round to fixing anything. I have said once I have not had a bout of fatigue for a week we can book something last minute. If i am going to spend half the day in bed I would rather it was my own one.

All the waiting and uncertaintly is frustrating. I dont think two weeks is that bad though

Bubbles sudden thoughts while under the influence of steroids pre chemo and thus buzzing and sleepless.
I don’t know what you have been told re breast clinic appointment. You can download the information booklet from the website or ring the helpline for it. Most clinics do triple assessment. An examination by surgeon, depending on that a mammogram and/ or an ultrasound athough this is not always done and perhaps a biopsy depending on the findings. If your lump is a benign cyst they will drain it if it is large and tight throw the fluid away and that is that unless it refills or the fluid is bloodstained, some hospitals send the fluid for examinayion but not all. Benign lumps are also biopsied for a definative diagnosis. Most clinics will give you an idea re their thoughts but this is not always possible until the histology/ cytology samples have been reported.
It is all very frightening and I do so hope you are one of the lucky ladies. Ironically it is usually the ladies with benign results that leave the clinics in tears. Tears of relief. I am so sorry if this explanation scares you. Take a friend if possible and expect to be there for at least an hour or two. Parking is also difficult so allow extra time.
I hope your wait is not too long. My first breast screening assessment clinic was very delayed and I spent my time with three other ladies so we had a group huggle. They were all ok so I hope you are too.
Thinking of you