Aww good on you for reaching out and now you can get help with the cording. One moment at a time. You will get there, look how far you have already come xxx
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I had a pucker about 1/2” in old money right ear the middle of my breasts after my left mastectomy - like someone had drawn together what was a hole (maybe for tube during the op?) It definitely would have shown regardless of any bra I wore. However it has all but disappeared - with patience and time (quite a lot of time). Try thinking of your poor wound and your body as if you were taking care of someone you really love (I hope you do). That way you will want to care for it and make it better. Best wishes.
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I had a lumpectomy in May 25 and unfortunately had quite an infection in the t junction. I’m the same as you. I massage the scar but hate doing it it’s very traumatic and the scar is VERY pronounced. I’m using Moo Goo which has been brilliant but I do so feel for you. It’s not a good feeling is it? Xxx
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I understand - I can’t even look at mine. What is the benefit of massaging the scar?
I have been using moo goo too.
X
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I’m massaging the scar because I’ve been told to by my clinic and that it helps to minimise it but I’m seeing a few people don’t massage so now I’m wondering whether it is beneficial 
. Must admit I’ve found Moo Goo to be lovely and I love the smell of one of the creams as it reminds me of Play Doh 
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Ahh, I didn’t realise. I guess it can only help! It’s been 4 months since I lost my breast. I still cry every day. X
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@2kittens how you getting on? 
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I felt exactly like this after my surgery. It took time and I had to go very slowly and on my own terms. You are not weak or failing, this is a real emotional shock as well as physical healing. It does get easier and one day it will feel more like part of you again. Be kind to yourself and take it one step at a time.
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Kittens, you are so precious.
The swelling will go down. Mine took a while to settle. Although I had two ops one was to remove the lump the second was to remove the lymph nodes. I have a “T” scar and I say it’s T for Today
I live each day to the fullest. Having cancer taught me to live in the moment.
For the moment you will need a little more patience and love for yourself. You are still reeling from the diagnosis and operation. You have to walk before you can run. Take time for yourself and give yourself a huge pat on the back, you have achieved so much for your future health and happiness.
Your scar will like mine become part of your mantra.
Step one is to learn to love your new self. Change that mental image to a warrior who has defeated cancer.
I sincerely hope you have people to love and help you and you manage to love yourself again.
Sending hugs and healing. God bless you 
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I can totally relate. I had a lumpectomy last July with nipple removal and can barely look at myself. I have managed to apply cream and my daughters help.
You could try apply the cream to a mini spatula and rubbing in in that way until you feel more comfortable.
All the best
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