Hi ladies,
not sure where to post this but I just feel so down. Was dx bc 2007 and went through chemo rads heceptin etc. Thought it was all ‘behind me’ but this summer have nursed my dear old Dad through Motor neurone Disease and more recently have had loads of financial problems with our business followed by my little girl being unwell and my brother (who was supposed to be supporting my Mum)seperating from his wife. I seem to have had endless troubles loaded onto to me and I just can’t cope anymore. I wish my Dad was still here he was so much stronger than me. every time I visit the Dr (for my daughter ) it reminds me of my diagnosis and I am finding it really hard to cope
Oh hun, I am so sorry to read about all that you have been through. No wonder you are feeling so down! Getting through Breast Cancer alone is an amazing achievement, never mind everything else you have had to deal with.
It might be an idea to speak to your doctor, to see if there is anything he can suggest. I’m not a great fan of taking tablets, but was prescribed anti-depressants a few months ago, after my diagnosis (aged 38 and with a nine month old baby) and I must admit they have helped. The other thing that helps is coming on here, and realising that we are not alone.
You sound like an amazing person, and I promise you that things will look up one day. As they say ‘what doesn’t kill you will make you stronger’. Well, just think what a strong person and great mummy you are.
Shenagh x
oh She thanks I needed to hear something like that thanks SO much
cheers
Caroline
Hi Caroline, I am so sorry that you have had such a difficult time recently. Shenagh has put it beautifully so cannot add anything more really. But just to let you know that we are all here for you and can understand just how you feel, although you seem to have had your fair share of worries.
In 1999, we had a year of hell…as I call it. My husband lost his Mum suddenly in January, his Dad in May and his aunt in August. In between all this I was diagnosed with bone mets and I thought " We cannot cope with anymore". It was an awful time. But ten years on and we got through it. Have different problems now but nothing like that awful time in our lives.
Please come on to this site whenever you feel low and we will be there for you. Many of us cannot sleep and there is even ladies writing in the middle of the night and early morning. Do not feel alone. What you are feeling is completely understandable. You have had a load to cope with. Take care. LOve Val (Scottishlass).
Shenagh is right Caroline.
I had an awful time when I started Tamoxifen. I had just started rads too and couldn’t stop crying. A radiologist asked a Mc Millan nurse to visit me. She told me she thought I needed anti depressants but I had already asked at my docs and been told no. When I told her this, she rang the doctors and told them off. The result is that, 3 years on, I have been taking 20 mg of Citalopram once a day and feel really well. There has been a piece in the news recently saying that cancer patients need help and testing for depression after diagnosis.
Please go and see your doctor Caroline. Citalopram are an SSRI ( selective seratonin re uptake inhibitor ) and are not addictive. You can stop them any time. They are also known to help with hot flushes.
Let us know how you get on.
At hospital for annual “poke’n’grope” this afternoon and v nervous. That feeling never leaves you does it?
Big hugs, Caroline
Debbie
Thanks for all your support ladies - went to see the Dr yesterday and she has prescribed citalopram so I will try them and see if they help me cope. Feel a bit calmer today - the Dr actually seemed to listen to me which helped.
Hope your ‘poke and grope’ went OK Thrifty - at least it is done with now for another year (hopefully ) but you are right that knot comes back in my stomach every time I have to be checked.
thanks ladies
caroline
caroline, I am in a very similar situation to you. I have had depression on and off since I was 15 and all the bc treatment and the sudden death of my father has set it off again.I think after treatment even a few years on the impact of this disease still effects us so much. I find others not in our position do not always understand. I have my first mammogram after treatment coming up and recognise that ‘knot’ of fear.I am glad you have got some help from your doctor. i was on citalopram for 8 years and it helped me. Unfortunately i have to change medication as it no longer works for me.Thinking of you and hoping that you start to feel more able to cope soon.
Rxx
Well done Caroline. I am glad you have a doctor who listens to you too. You will soon start to feel so much better. The only downside I found was that I no longer get worked up about housework. I used to be really houseproud and dont care any more. Poke and grope went ok thank you now just waiting for date for mammogram
Love
Debbie