I was recalled after a routine Mammo in October, November was told I had calcifications and needed stereotactic biopsy. Was worried but carried on. Had that 12th December, the results of which were inconclusive therefore had to have another on 23rd December as “this tumour is a concern” but probably B9. Started to fret and worry at the word tumour and “probably B9”. Due to Xmas I had to wait for results until 12th January, Had a stressed out Xmas and NY. 12th January told I have BC its DCIS caught early and only 6mm and I would need WLE and Radiotherapy. WLE was initially for 3rd Feb but was cancelled and rescheduled to 14th Feb. I am now struggling to get through the day with work I find myself crying for no reason, I am snapping at my OH daily and just feel so pathetic. I feel so pathetic, there are so many people in far more difficult places and I feel guilty for not coping and getting on with it. I am so scared and I seem to get worse every day, one day I convince myself this is nothing major then I dont. MY OH is ultra positive, he has even booked us flights to the USA for 7th March for a 2 week holiday he is so convinced I am fine! My kids are too (all adults)and it makes me feel I am worried about nothing. Why cant I feel that positive about it? Is this normal or am I really as pathetic as I feel?
Hi Dollydog, no you are not pathetic!!! We all have been there and if you read through some of the threads you will see that all the wonderful women here have gone through exactly the same emotions. My hubby was the same determined for me and I was really angry with him but you know what? When you get your treatment plan you will feel more in control because you will know what is happening next. I won’t lie this is the most rotten time of all the dreaded wait to get started and I am sure your hubby understands much more than you realise. My hubby was and is amazing, I think I forgot just how strong he had to be to support me but I am now 18 months down the road and looking back I know how scared I was and it came out in tears every day until I started treatment. Be kind to yourself and it makes no difference on this site who had what ,for how long they all are an incredible support and certainly saved my sanity on many occasions! Use the site stick to the bits that won’t scare you, DON’T google! Come on here and vent we are all here and will listen and it goes to a safe place with people who really understand the ups and downs. Sending you loads of hugs and please keep in touch so we all know where you are up to. Em xxxxx
Hi Dollydog
This is all so very scary and you have every right to feel exactly as you do.
I was diagnosed in Sept 11 and am due to finish chemotherapy prior to surgery.
I remember the shock of being told I had BC and I literally cried for the first 2 weeks, the worst being telling everyone I had BC.
Once the date is set and you have the surgery and radiotherapy starts you will feel so much better.
The doctors and consultants know what is best for us and you need to be guided by them.
I found talking to my breast care nurse put any worries I had at bay.
Our OHs are only trying to be strong and positive for us, it must be so difficult for them.
Please be positive, they have found your BC at such an early stage and before you know it you will be completing your radiotherapy.
Good luck and be positive.
Loads of hugs coming your way.
Linda
x
hiya-i was the same-recalled from a mammo-had a wle and 3 weeks of rads-all such a shock-you aren’t pathetic-but i felt the same-should be grateful-and i am-but scared too !! finished rads sept and i’m doing fine-just tired sometimes-but i have a nap and am fine.i have a good prognosis-but there’s always “what if”-that’s human nature.once you have your plan you will feel more able to cope-and come on here whenever you need help-no judgements on here-just practical advice and emotional support-neither of which i have at home- x
Thanks, I am sure your right and once treatment starts and I know whats happening and when I will feel more in control of my life again. I just dont recognise myself some days at the moment so thank you for letting me know its normal to feel as I do. I read the threads about wire localisation and thats eased some of my fears, thank you all. x