I should be feeling out of this world- I want to have a better life .I have been advised to take anti- deprssents but I an sure can cope
so… come to the bar
Mary
What is your story ??
Love Andrea x
Mary
R u okay???
Kay x
mary -
maybe I’ll see you in the DDI – are you just not wanting to to start taking AD or is it something else?
Emily
xxx
Hi maryfrod
I just wanted to say that you may find it helpful to talk things through with one of our helpliners, they can offer you support and a ‘listening ear’, they are open this morning from 9am until 2pm and weekdays 9am - 5pm, the number is 0808 800 6000.
Best wishes
Katie
Mary
Hope you are alright. Let us know how you are getting on and if you need some help.
xxxxx
Mary
Hope you are OK, let us all know how you are - we do care about you lots
Mary -
as everyone above me has said, we do care about you. You have another post which is “What’s the Point” – and I guess in anger and disgust and downright tiredness of it all, it feels like nothing is every going to be OK again.
We are all going through such a hard journey, taking medicine we never heard about, having people rule our lives when once we seemed free, appointments, hot flashes (flushes?). Where once we were strong and very active, now we get tired in no time. I dare not rest my head or I’ll drop off in a minute! We have changed.
The point is that your life is worth all of this and more. The point is that once the medicines and routines and horrible dx are over, we are alive. We, esp as women, are unbelievably adaptable. We can rebuild our lives around whatever cancer can throw at us – we are stronger that it is. And we draw from a Source much more powerful than ourselves. If I may be bold, just link to your Source (by whatever name it goes for you) and then give it back to cancer triple-fold.
Many hugs and kisses sweetie - you are so not alone!
Emily
xxxooo
HI
I am ok.I have been given good news so I should be happy,but somehow I still feel down.Am worried about finances too with being off work for so long. I got diagnosed the day before my wedding and had to cancel honeymoon, so feels like its been a hard road and a strain on us ,although he has been fantastic and really supportve
Sorry for going on,feeling sorry for myself wont help will it.
Take care
Mary
x
Glad you got back to post and let us know you are ok… I think a good few of us were very worried about you.
You mention that you are worried abut your finances and I can relate to that - I am a single with an 18 yr old and money is tight at the best of times. Since my cancer was dx I’ve remained on full pay but there are a lot of hidden extras which has meant that money is even tighter. I’m in that no-go bracket of earning too much to qualify for any benefits but not earning enuff to have any spare cash…so I can relate to your concerns about money. I seriously think it is going to take about a year to get back on my feet financially after this… but I know I will get there in the end.
As for feeling flat when you’ve just received good news - I suppose after all we have been through it’s difficult to feel happy when we hear good news.
Your dx probably came at the worst possible time - not that there is a good time of course - and having to cancel a honeymoon is a major deal… normally I would be suggesting that you book another holiday as a delayed honeymoon for when you feel up to it, but with the finances beig a worry then that is probably not the best suggestion.
I really don’t know what to suggest. Sometimes everything just seems to get on top of us and we can’t see a way out. I have been very positive since my dx and during treatment but I still get days when I just want to shut the door on the whole damn thing and for everything and everyone to go away and leave me alone.
I hope that you find some way out of the sorrow that you are feeling.
I have a ggod salary, but am now only getting SSP ,i dont have any mortgage protection amd they have basically said tough you need to pay it, but I cant give what I havent got.I can get incapacity benefit when SSP runs but much the same really
As for the hol, my brother has an appartment in Spain, so booked cheap flights ago and goin first 2 weeks in July
Thanks
Mary
x
Hi Mary
I am sorry about your financial situation. this is a major problem for a lot of us on here and I guess anyone who is off work long term. The bills still keep coming in despite the fact you can’t work. Like Lilac said, it will take some time to get it back on an even footing, but you will be able to do it. What about MacMillan? I have heard they provide financial support so it might be worth contacting them. Also, I think your results were probably an anti-climax to all your recent ordeal. I know mine were. I expected to feel elated once I had good results. Instead, I felt numb. I think I had pinned all my hopes on results day and expected that all my troubles would just melt away as soon as I had the results and of course, they didn’t. I am sure your mortgage provider should come to some arrangement. Its not in their interest to let a house be repossessed so they might accept less for a while?
I sincerely hope you feel better soon
Cathy
xx
I want to use the site but I’m a bit of a computer novice. I would like to talk back to a lot of you. ‘but I don’t know how’ when Iam feeling better I must go and get some computer training!! lol
Mary - your mortgage must be a major worry to you … the attitude of the lender does not sound very helpful, perhaps you could go to CAB and get some advice. I understand that they will liase between a creditor and yourself to work out an affordable deal. I hope you manage to get it resolved. As Cathy says it’s not in their interests in the long run to re-posses.
Denb4be - you’ve managed to speak to us in this post, so well done on your computer progress. Just do exactly what you did on this thread and type your message in the ‘Enter your Comments’ box then click on the ‘Add your comments’ box underneath. If you want to start a new discussion just click on the ‘Start New Discussion’ box on the top left hand side of the screen - enter the title and select the section you want your discussion to go into and then type your message in the box as usual… sorry if you knew all this and I sounds patrinising … I used to be a work on an internet technical helpline and talking ppl through computer problems and I still go into tech support mode at the drop of a hat.
Mary - Thanks for answering us. Pushy lil things aren’t we?
I didn’t realize you were in the process of getting married when BC hit; never mind postponing your honeymoon. Poor baby…that is very very hard. Spain sounds good though. All in all, it is just so much at once, I guess.
Can’t steer you in any direction since I am in the US 
Denb4be - Were you thinking about the Whisper Back? That is the private message. In order to send a Private Message (PM), you need to fill out the box above the box for the regular message. It says, send a private message to (optional) and you fill in the name. I have done this once. The person gets a PM and you have the option to Whisper Back. It just means that you 2 are the only ones to see the message.
Lilac & Cathy - hello again. always good to hear your sound advice…we are in this together for sure…
Emily
xxx
Thank you ladies,
Have given myself a harsh talking to haha.
I am sure things will sort themselves out
Mary
x