hi everyone its been a long time since i was on this forum i had just been dx when i was last on iv had 2 lots of surgery and now have got to start chemo next week im dreading it i feel like i cant talk to anyone about this iv put a brave face on for my family saying i was not bothered about my hair falling out etc etc , now its a different thing i feel like im falling to pieces and have no one to talk to any suggestions would be appreciated thanks love sue xxx
The best thing is to hang on to the idea that these are the big guns that will,hopefully,zap any remaining cancer cells.Chemo itself varies from person to person but almost everyone finds it ‘doable’.It is not the nightmare of years ago with constant vomiting etc.As long as you follow advice from bcn and chemo unit you will cope.It passes I promise.There is lots of advice on here about coping with side effects and if ever you feel really down we are here;all of us,to support you and cheer you on.Love Valxx
hi val thanks for the advice its just that i feel like im cracking iv nobody to talk to , its like im standing still and the world is passing me by i dont know if these are normal feelings , anyway thanks love sue xxx
Hi Jaydeek
If you need someone to talk to, even if it’s only to sound off at, do use the helpline, they’re a good listening ear and are there for you during times like these. The lines are open until 5pm today, so give them a call. 0808 800 6000.
Take care,
Jo, Facilitator
thanks for the helpline number but i will not need it i cant go on like this im on my own trying to deal with this i cant do it thanks xxx
Hi Jaydeek,
I know exactly what your going through because i’m going through the same. I had to get two lots of surgery and my chemo starts on the 11th June. I have tried on wigs which i found difficult to do and i don’t know how or if i’m going to wear one outside infront of others. Your not alone doll i really sympathise with you and maybe it might not be as bad as we both think it’s going to be.(fingers crossed eh!). Keep in touch and we can exchange notes and support each other since we seem to be going to go through it at the same time. Chin up. ; )
Ann x
thanks for that i am so depressed its unbelievable i cant cope with it all , i had problems coming to terms with the cancer i have also got an appt on friday for a wig i did not think losing my hair would bother me but reality has hit home , its good to talk to someone who is going through this , im sick of hearing people say you will be alright or you are brave im not bloody brave at all , thanks for listening stay in touch love sue xxx
I know what you mean, i’ve had people telling me how well i’m coping and how brave i am but the truth of it is i scared to h**l.
Hi Vodka and Jaydeek,
I remember so well being where you are now. Absolutely terrified, reeling from the shock of being told that I needed chemo, the world carrying on while I felt mine had ended. Terrible panic.
This week I have my sixth and final. I am dreading it. But I have got through it all. I have felt at times very ill but there has also been times when I felt OK. I had to go to the sessions by myself and at times I didn’t know how I could make myself get there. But I did.
Please believe Horace, myself and countless others who will say “It is do-able, you can get through it”.
Jaydeek you sound as if you are still in shock. Do you have to be so “brave”? Can you not share your fears with someone ? Those around you may be fearful too and wanting you to be honest with them.
Take care and remember how warm and welcoming this site can be
Margaret
i find it hard to talk to people face to face im in a heap here i dont know what to do thanks for listening to me i do appreciate it xxxx
Thanks for that Margaret, and this is a great site.
Jaydeek, it’s just a thought but maybe your family/ friends are just as scared as you but don’t want to say so because your putting on a brave face for them. Try (i know it’s hard) but please try and talk to them and let them know how you feel. This is about you and you need all the help and support from them. Remember your bcn can get you in touch with a support group. I’m going to go to my first one in a couple of weeks, just before my chemo starts. Sometimes with groups like that you end up meeting a friend who understands all the emotions and fears you feel and you end up meeting outside the group for extra support.
Take Care
Ann x
jaydeek
you sound off all you like, I have been on a monster moan recently. No-one minds at all and you can always find someone else in exactly the same mind set around here, because we are all going through cycles of moods. This is a really big thing, maybe the biggest thing to hit most of us. I try to keep chin up for the kids, still feeling too bad that I have not done my daughters any favours. I am going through cycles of yeeh I can do it, I am going to emigrate and take my chances, would it be quicker to lie down in the road, I am a nuisance., I don’t want this. You don’t have to be anything just say what you feel. I had to read some really really sad threads on this site to get mine into perspective, believe me some of our friends here are awesome. Early days right now and it will calm and we are all really sorry you have this too. I bought 2 wigs, made it a fun day and had a real laugh that day, trying silly styles on, but they are still in the box. I have 8 hats I have not worn yet and endless scarves I have not worked out how to do yet. No rush just yet, little steps just look at the very next thing you have to do. Have not heard of anyone whose hair went in under 2 weeks yet. I am giving the cold cap a try.Some people have hair still,
Hugs
Lily x
I got my wig today and it looks fantastic just like my own hair I went to friends and nieghbours with it on and they didnt even notice lol so guess Ive cracked it as i dont want to wear hats and scarfs Iam now looking forward to starting my chemo (tomorrow) now I can get on get it out the way and get on with my life after all its only 7 months from the next 30 years drop in the ocean we make it through no matter waht because us women are strong after all we put up with men lol so chin up hun you’ll do it and beat this crappy thing no problem be strong and positive find the funny points in this and believe me there are plenty.
Good luck
Jo
Jaydeek you sound seriously depressed and I am sure I am not alone in feeling worried about you.You CAN do this.You will cope because you must,and you must talk to someone.A close friend or a family member if you cant talk to the helpline.Love Valxx
if you want we can talk on msn if you cant talk face to face i dont have anyone to talk to either
Jo
hi jo thankyou it would be nice to talk on msn xxx
Joanne
You cool wig dude!
Lily x
I start my chemo today so could do with a good natter later and let you know how I get on
hi jo iv probably missed you but good luck for today will chat later love sue xxx
Joanne
How did it go? Are you feeling ok so far?Thinking of you
Lily x