I'm new - please can somebody give me some honest answers?

Hi, I’m not sure if I should be posting here, as I don’t have cancer, but my mum does. I’m sorry if I’m in the wrong place but I was hoping somebody could give me some answers?

My mum was diagnosed with breast cancer a few years ago, last year we found I had spread to her bones and she was given a prognosis of 2-3 years. Since then, she has undergone aggressive chemotherapy, an operation on her spine and a full hip replacement.

We were hoping that she would begin to walk again and have some form of life, however the past year, she has been in and out of hospitals and hospices.

Lately , she has been in pain with her back, which she has not had for a while. She then became very jaundiced and extremely tired within a matter of days. She feels so poorly and weak that she can hardly talk. Se has lost her appetite. She has been told that there may be a blockage on her liver, bit they will be unable to do the stent treatment and I doubt they woul operate. She has now been taken back in to a hospice. Are things looking bad or could it be a minor hiccup on the road to recovery? How long is the prognosis for untreated liver problems?

Thanks in advance.

Purple frog im really sorry about youre mam i hope they are getting her pain under control .I know with bone mets people can live for years and years as it is a slower growing form of cancer and treatment has improved enormousely ,however we all know that breast cancer can spread to the liver and brain and lungs etc and with youre mams Jaundice i really think you need to have an appointment with her consultant and discuss if she is well enough for furthur tests to rule this out .You will be more worried about youre mam not knowing and if she is not well enough for any surgery or tests then they need to be referring her to palliative care team to control her pain and symptoms and for support for you and your family ( you do not say how old youre mam is) but whatever their age this is never easyI really hope her symptoms are just a blockage but you have a word with her medical team cos you need to know some answers xxxxxBig hugs Julie

I can only agree with juliebtaurus: your poor mother is clearly very poorly and you need to be speaking to her medical team and getting some straight answers.
Thinking of you.

Hi there purplefrog,
I agree with the others,we are not qualified to say how much longer your mum has left,the doctors might not even know but they should have some sort of idea.
All people are different and all the cancers are different so maybe one person who you thought was doing well, suddenly dies,and maybe someone who you think could take no more can cling on to life much longer.
It must be very upsetting for you,to be asking these questions,I hope you have lots of support and you find the answers you are looking for. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hi purplefrog,

As you can see by the replies you’ve got that you’ve come to the right place for some good support for yourself and your mum. If you would like some extra support and a good ‘listening ear’ then the team on the helpline are here for you. Please give them a ring and have a chat lines are open Mon-Fri 9-5 and Sat 9-2. 0808 800 6000, calls are free.

Hope this helps. Take care,
Jo, Facilitator

Thankyou very much for all your replies. Mums doctor has advised that her body is in a toxic state due to liver blockage from cancer. The dr has said that her body is very tired and is starting to slow down. They are going to start her on steroids but I’m not sure what this will do for her.

It has been such a tough year, we found out her cancer was incureable last year when I was pregnant with my first baby. My mum was so excited and couldn’t wait to babysit and everything else, but unfortunately it has never turned out that way. She has hardly been able to hold my baby. It’s been so tough having a new baby and having no support, (my partner works away and I have no close family or friends that could help), I really wished my mum could have been part of it all, she is so sad about it all.

I’m just hoping that she will make it to Christmas because she is so excited about my babys 1st Christmas .

I really feel for everyone and their families that are going through this cruel disease. Life is so unfair xx

I really feel for you,and your mum who to me does not sound good at all,just remember cancer affects all your family including you so please take care of yourself,you sound like you need a hug (((hug)))
I am so sorry you have found yourself in this situation and like you say you should be enjoying your new baby and all that a baby brings.
I hope your mum is not at least in pain,and you have alot of support.
I wish you all the best xxxxxxxxxxx love Caron xxxxxxxxxxx