Hi Mandy, my lymph nodes are clear too PHEW. What a nightmare for you, sounds like they are sorting it though.
I am also having trouble healing. I have exactly what you decribe…how wierd is that? A black scabbed area above the horizontal scar on my breast, also size of a 50p piece… The surgeon seems to think it will be ok & that he will be able to do my reconstruction in time for my wedding in November. I am worried though. If it doesnt heal he cant do the recon in time. I dont know whether to postpone the wedding.
I cant go as I am now as Im lopsided. If it was a normal holiday I wouldnt be bothered, but its my wedding & honeymoon in Jamaica & is costing a fortune. I want to feel good about how I look. I really dont know what to do.
I have been really upset today. Everyone thinks I should be over the moon, which I am in one way, but on the other hand now I know Im all clear, I can deal with the fact that I have lost my breast, nipple & feeling. The last few weeks have been awful as you know & its all hitting me.
We are now left with a deformed body, for the time being at least & we have to deal with that. I think this on top of maybe having to move the wedding has really got to me. I feel deflated & people dont understand why.
I hope you feel ok hun & thta all goes ok tomorrow. I will be thinking of you. Please let me know how you go on.
Love Cath xx
Oh Cath, I am so sorry that you are feeling bloody awful…I am trying not to dwell on anything too much, just getting through each day. Been very uncomfortable today, can’t even wear a bra…gearing myself for another anaesthetic, and hoping that I won’t be sick. My sister has just been round to give me my evening jab, the only way that I could get discharged on Monday was if she would give these to me (anti coagulent) every night! I must admit the first time I saw myself in the bathroom mirror on the ward I sobbed. I looked like frankinstein!!! But heh, lets put these into perspective, our cancer is GONE, and now it’s all the ‘titivating’ (sorry!)…we will get there slowly. Re your wedding, you probably don’t need the stress that this seems to be causing you. it should be an enjoyable time for you, with the planning and looking forward to it all. Can you see what your options are?
and how strange that we have the same healing problem, sisters in sickness and spirit x x
will reply once I am home again, they may keep me in for the night x x
Hi Cath
Just got home, they kept me in overnight for fear of bleeding fom donor site which I did at about 4am. All padded up, feeling sore, swollen all over but relieved to be lying here on my bed in a cool room. Feeling very battle weary, and can’t possibly face any more ops or anaesthetics in the foreseeable future. Think nipples can sit on the back burner, who needs 'em anyway? Sorry that this is short but feeling very emotional. Had letter from M-I-L waiting for me, contained cheque for £1100 to pay for our St Lucia flights in December. Made me weep. Have been so touched and humbled by people’s kindness in all of this.
love M x
Glad you are home hun. You just chill now & recover. Like you say, nipples can wait.
I saw surgeon again yesterday & I have necrosis. He doesnt want to cut it away though, he wants it to heal on its own as he needs the skin to be ok for my reconstruction. He thinks it will heal in time for recon in september. He kows about our wedding & says he will do all he can so I am symetrical for that.
Also, forgot to say before, but they found some invasive cancer in my breast, but as it was removed with the MX I didnt need chemo as it was a small amount.
I have decided to go ahead with the wedding & stick two fingers up to cancer…it can bloody well sod off.
Great news about your st lucia flights…it will be amazing. I will be back from Jamaica by then & preparing for my daughters wedding in January.
Hope you manage to sleep ok tonight & you arent in too much pain.
Take care of yourself
big hugs Cath xx
Hi Cath
well it’s a couple of days post 3rd op, and although very tired, sore and swollen feeling better in my head and more positive. Just praying that the surgical procedures are over now and I can just get on with the healing. So pleased for you and your wedding plans and yes, sod off Cancer…kick it into touch! Back tomorrow to clinic, may have the first fill in left breast expander. Still feeling that I have two ‘things’ strapped to my chest, they really don’t feel like part of me at all. But talking to family who have had new hips and knees, they felt something similar and took about six months to adjust. My husband has been brilliant, really looking after me, washing my hair, my feet, cooking, cleaning, he even made 20 jars of blackcurrant jam last night under my supervision ( he grows the stuff and I make the jam/chutney, but not this year and didn’t want to waste it all). He hasn’t even raised one eyebrow! My two sisters have been angels, as have my sons and their partners…I really couldn’t have got through this without them all. I am just so grateful. We WILL get through this and out the other side.
lots of love M x
ps a friend sent me a get well pressie…The Secret by Rhonda Byrne, can recommend it, lifting my spirits daily x x
Sorry you are so sore, but Im glad yuo are feeling more positive 
good luck with the fill today.
Jam making…Im impressed, its amazing what everyone does to help isnt it? I have had lots of help too. I can do some things now but am finding that if I do too much, I get a seroma under my arm so I am taking it slowly. My necrosis is healing slowly I think. I dont want to jeopardize healing or reconstruction so am taking it easy.
I go to reconstruction clinis next week & am going to ask about removing the tissue from my ‘good’ breast. He is reconstructing both anyway so its a thought. I wont be in this position again that way.
I will check out the book thnaks.
Take care of yourself, take it easy,
Lots of love Cath xx
Sorry you are so sore, but Im glad yuo are feeling more positive good luck with the fill today.
Jam making…Im impressed, its amazing what everyone does to help isnt it? I have had lots of help too. I can do some things now but am finding that if I do too much, I get a seroma under my arm so I am taking it slowly. My necrosis is healing slowly I think. I dont want to jeopardize healing or reconstruction so am taking it easy.
I go to reconstruction clinis next week & am going to ask about removing the tissue from my ‘good’ breast. He is reconstructing both anyway so its a thought. I wont be in this position again that way.
I will check out the book thnaks.
Take care of yourself, take it easy,
Lots of love Cath xx