Yes lifting!! My fingers haven’t turned black, the whites are just getting bigger. I’ve got 1 black toe nail though. I’m in bits, ive just said buy to the kids, it’s so unfair why me. Cancer sucks.
Aww Debbie, it really does suck 
Sending you virtual hugs xxx
Good luck today Debbie, will be thinking of you, in a few hours it’ll all be done xx
Same here! Hopefully you’re out of theatre by now Debbie and having a well deserved tea and toast 
I finally got around to going to the chemist to get done eye drops for my streaming eyes. Was recommended Viscotears liquid gel for dry eyes. Really don’t understand how my eyes can be dry when they constantly stream down my face! I guess they e made my eyes feel a little more comfortable but they’re still watering. What are the rest of you with this problem using?
I’ve been doing quite a bit of walking each day which has helped stop me stiffening up. Not as fit as I used to be but I’m improving, legs don’t feel so heavy now.
Xxx
Kim. I have had the same problem with my eyes apparently chemo affects the tear ducts. I think at some stage our eyes are dry and the body then floods with tears to rectify it. I use artificial tear drops during the day and Lubristil lubricating eye drops at bedtime. I have had no problems since using this. Maureen
Thanks Maureen - I’ll give that a go too! Xx
Hi.
I’m back on ward, all well. Had tea and toast Kim!! So relieved it’s over. Hopefully staying in for a couple of days, so lots of rest!
Thank you for your messages.
Debbie xx
Great news! There’s nothing better (in my opinion) than tea and toast after surgery!! Hope you’re relatively pain free and have a peaceful night. Take care xxx
I hate the thought of losing my nails ? Still have the dark nail varnish in mine and as I’ve said, they’re tender and look faintly bluish under the nail polish. They seem strong enough but worried it won’t last! I used the oncolife nail drops all through FEC and painted them dark for the T part, putting the nail drops on when I changed my nail varnish. I notice the December thread are discussing nails too!!
Xxx
Kim, I know how you feel about loosing your nails, I can’t imagine what they will look like and there is nothing we can put over them if they come off. I’ve used onicolife drops too and dark nail varnish. I just took nail varnish off on Wednesday in preparation for surgery then noticed the changes, before putting last lot of nail varnish on mine were purple to third/half of the way up. Once I’m out of hospital I’m going to put nail varnish on and just hope for the best that they stay on!! Today is 4 weeks since my last chemo- where has that gone!!
Hope everyone is doing ok.
Love Debbie xx
When I re-did my nails on Monday I noticed that a couple of them look purple and bruised underneath. Really hoping not to lose them.
Claire, I haven’t heard anything else about when to start tables, but when I last saw oncologist she indicated that it would happen after rads. She was also concerned about my arm swelling that I was having clexane injections for as if it was still swollen I’d have to have different meds. I’m due to see her on 31st may so will find out more then xx
Hi Fiona,
I’m doing ok, surgery was fine it’s the build up that’s the worst. I’m still in hospital, I’m hoping that I might be out tomorrow but I don’t want to go home with drain in as not nice for kids, and it’s still producing quite a bit. I’m feeling quite emotional today, reality is kicking in. I’m waiting for my husband to bring in some nice food, why is hospital food so awful!! Hope you manage to get your sleep back on track.
Take care
Debbie xxx
Morning all,
Surgery update- I’ve just had my drain checked and it’s OK to come out today so I can go home- yippee!! Looking forward to getting into my own bed, some good food and seeing Hubble and kids!!
I hope everyone is doing ok. Who is the first to start rads?
Love and hugs
Debbie xx
Just typed a long reply and lost it!!
You’ll be glad to get home Debbie, hope you do t have to hang around too long to be discharged.
I start rads on Weds so I think I may be second to start although pretty sure Sissy starts soon too. Hope all goes well today Ellie! Normally today I’d be starting the steroids and rushing around d the house tidying and cleaning and cooking for the freezer!! No energy for that today!! It will be good tomorrow waking up on day 22 knowing I’m not going to be infused with more chemicals!
Side effects I’m left with are tender nails so I’m sure I’ll lose some at some point, general achiness and stiffness and watery eyes but I have to say they have improved with the new eye ointment I use at night (lacri-lube) I’d use it in the day to but u can’t see for a good 10 mins after I put it in!! So use the other ones in the day. Plus I am bloated - all over!! I have tried to
get into about 4 pairs of jeans / trousers with no luck!! Can’t get my legs in them let alone do them up!! No idea what I can wear today now - aarrgghh!!
Wonder if I can get away with baggy cropped trousers without shaving my legs…
Xxx
Sitting waiting for rads having got here an hour early. Unintentionally!
Hi all, had my first rads today, all okay, I got a bit tearful though at the beginning, i think it was the fear of the Unknown. Today’s took around 20 mins as they sort out your positioning and X-ray it to make sure its correct. The rads machine moves around you and then what your laying on moves around as well. I found holding my head in position hard as I kept wanting to talk! I’ve upped my hours at work to four a shift, which is going well, a enjoying being back and having something else to think about.
Kim and claire, I’d put on around a stone during chemo, I also have jeans and summer trousers that now don’t fit well. I’ve managed to lose 3Ibs in the last two weeks, which is a start, and I’m feeling less out of breath when walking. Head hair is growing back well and I’m having my remaining eyebrows tinted on Wednesday, which I’m excited about as it will be nice to properly see what I have left!
Claire, I’ve had some problems with the fear over the last few days. My mx area has felt quite tight and sore over the last couple of chemos which worries me. Every other ache and pain I have I automatically think it’s cancer related, even though the majority of the pains are ones I had pre diagnosis. I too worry about making plans too far ahead in case it all goes wrong and is taken away from me again. It’s very hard to live with the fear. I think i might get some more counselling to help.
Great news Debbie about the drain, it’ll great to get home and eat something different! Ellie, I hope your rads today were okay and not too traumatic! Mechelle, the middle parts of a couple of my finger nails have also gone purple, I’m hoping they hang on! Love to anyone I’ve missed xx
Really good news Fiona, it’s nasty stuff that chemo, but it does it’s job!
Xxx
Ellie, can you feel anything when the rads are happening? The machine moves into three different positions for mine and today during one of them I could feel what I describe as a warmth. Xx
I have bought enough moisturiser for the whole of the clinic in preparation for tomorrow (Aveeno 3 for 2 in Boots ) Just been sorting out a bikini top to wear instead of a bra for comfort, although the ones I thought I could wear were underwired, and the one that’s not has beads between the cups - I use the term ‘cups’ loosely!!
Went out and bought bigger sized cropped trousers today having failed to get in any of my jeans yesterday!
Seeing the lymphoedema therapist tomorrow after radiotherapy, so I’m hoping she can reduce the swelling in my arm as I couldn’t even get on the compression sleeve yesterday and today especially having numb finger nails! It’s all good fun this breast cancer lark 
Xxx
Had first rads this morning, was there just over an hour! Called from the main waiting area on time, had a short chat with 2 members of the team before being shown to the changing rooms to strip off my top half and change into my dressing gown then had to wait in a different waiting room for another half hour! The actual radiotherapy was fine tho, took a few mins to get me in position and got drawn on again and then it was probably about 5 mins of the machine doing its work. Then I had a chat with a consultant who’ll see me ever week to check everything is going well. Smothered myself with moisturiser, got dressed then off to the lymphoedema clinic!
The lymphoedema therapist was really nice and reassured me that my arm is probably as bad as it will get due to chemotherapy and not to expect too much from it until after radiotherapy. After that she was confident that they would be able to sort it out so usually it would look and feel normal again. Such a relief! Because my nails are numb, I can’t put my compression sleeve on, so she showed my husband how to bandage my arm at night for the next few weeks!! So I have huge bandaging in my arm as she said I may as well keep it on until the morning now!! At least it’s nice and warm in this chilly day!!
How are you all getting on?
Xxx