Oh yes I’ve heard of the spoon theory. I definitely need to start applying that to my life now. I’ve over done it this week purely by trying to do a few things each day that would have been so simple before cancer.Lesson learnt.
However I am going to the cinema this afternoon which I’m really looking forward to 
Enjoy your day out on Sunday.
Hello everyone. The variety of side effects is neverending, isn’t it? Also I find if anything happens to any bit of my body or mind Im wondering is it just a thing, or a thing caused by the treatment?
@jenny4 positive news from your oncologist regarding targeted therapy and possible immunity issues. I wonder how old is old? Asking for myself (61 
).
In terms of improvements, my hair on my head is growing back rapidly and looks cute so far. Also my eyebrows and eyelashes. The eyelashes in particular have really helped my confidence in how I look. Slight downside - I now have a furry face and lots of chin hair.
@twinks77 enjoy the cinema! Hoping to go soon. Are you going to see Wicked 2?
He mentioned that the women who tended to have issues in his hospital’s studies were in their 70s. So great to hear that your hair is returning!
Just to add that he said it was still only a few women in their 70s whose immunity was impacted-sorry, I should have included that earlier.
Yes we saw Wicked 2. I enjoyed it nice to do something different for a change.
I’m rubbish at tagging but just to throw my experience in. Im 7 weeks on from my last docetaxel and my muscles are still screaming. I am however able to play padel for 90 mins at a time 3 times a week and each time Im feeling stronger. I take pain killers before and the adrenaline helps. I do think this is helping my fatigue and strength in the long term but I feel knackered afterwards and need a nap in the afternoon usually.
Other than that Im almost back to doing normal things. Im just trying to keep some time at the weekends especially for catching up on sleep - big afternoon nana naps needed.
Ive done 3 of 15 rounds of radiotherapy and while the parking is by far the most stressful thing about it I have a bit of a rash on my boob and chest. Could be from the aloe vera gel that turns out was old! or from the radio. Its not itchy or painful at all but Im now using moogoo instead. Everything about the radio process is smooth and the radiologists are lovely. Ill be glad when its all done though especially as they are digging up the only patient car park starting tomorrow and have warned about further delays (peak stress over that!)
I have no eye lashes now and my few eyebrow hairs seem to be getting fewer. I have white bum fluff on my head, very short and very very fluffy! Also very patchy - Im a real looker at the mo!
Im told ill be having abemociclib but I had 10/20 lymph nodes affected. Im hoping that wont start until Jan so I can have a break at xmas. We are hoping to go on a last minute trip to some sun if I can find insurance and dont feel too bad.
Im going to try to keep doing everything as normal and just listen to my body when I need a rest.
Oh and my fingernails are stronger now, still brown but I have signs of healthy nail growth at the cuticles. My toes have stopped hurting too but I have some odd peeling skin on my feet. It doesnt hurt, its just odd. And everything is dry… lips, hands, feet, eyes.
Looking forward to 9 dec when the daily hospital visits stop, that will be 3 days after my anniversary. So much for the “3 months and you’ll be done” comment from my first surgical appointment. xx
Thanks for the update. It’s reassuring to hear how people who a few weeks ahead of me are getting on. Makes me feel a bit more ‘normal’
My hair is also a patchy fuzz.
I’ve got re-excision surgery on 4th Dec so I’m not at the radiotherapy stage yet. That will be in the new year.
I met up with two friends today and it’s really boosted my spirits.
It’s fantastic that you’re back to regular padel sessions @warmfuzzies! Your team must be really impressed with your stamina. Sorry to hear that your eyes and skin are still dry-mine are too but are very slowly improving. I really hope you can book a holiday; you so deserve it after the year you’ve had.
@twinks77 I’ll be thinking about you on the 4th and hoping that you have a speedy recovery from surgery.
I went to an online session on fatigue run by Maggies on Friday which I’d really recommend. It helped me to understand that I’ve been sabotaging my recovery by overdoing it every time I start feeling better and it gave really useful tips on pacing. I’m going to try to put it in practice this week and factor it into my phased return to work…
@twinks77 is re-excision when they go in because they didnt get enough margins the first time? It’s one Ive not heard of so just wondering. Good luck with the surgery.
Radiotherapy is fine, I just feel a bit vacant at the moment, like Im away with the faries. I can’t concentrate for long and find myself staring into space a lot. I think its just emotional overwhelm as part of me still cant believe Ive got actual cancer. That happens to other people doesn’t it?!
I think I find it weird that there is no real all clear, were just in a constant state of seeing if it comes back on future scans. I find that just a bit hard to wrap my head around.
Im waffling. I played padel this morning but found it really hard to focus so I didnt play well. Still, I moved my body and didnt dwell for a few hours so thats good.
xxx
Yeah that’s exactly what it is. They found dcis on the margins after my lumpectomy so they’re going back in for another go. Hopeful for clear margins this time 
Glad your radiotherapy went well.
Yes that’s exactly how the skin on my face feels - thick and rough! I had assumed it was to do with radiotherapy skin attack (just finished my 3 week course) but it’s hard to know which symptom is attributable to which cause - no idea what ‘normal’ me is anymore 
It’s horrible, isn’t it? Mine is a lot better than it was but has taken weeks to rebalance. I hope yours recovers soon too.
This sums up exactly how I feel. It still doesn’t seem real that I had cancer and the lack of routine follow-up post-mastectomy is terrifying.
Putting my hand up as another one who doesn’t feel like it was all real. I’m 3 weeks out of chemo and had my oncologist follow up yesterday. I went armed with questions, but still it didn’t feel like I was there to talk about me and my cancer (even typing that feels weird).
On the plus side, I got a stay of execution on starting Tamoxifen - going back in March for that conversation. Hopefully the hypnotherapy will resolve my absolute terror at the thought of it in the meantime! My radiotherapy planning scan is next week. I’ll also be back in to see the surgical team the week after as I seem to have developed what I think is cording down my ribs in several places, that’s just appeared 7 months post - lumpectomy.
Maybe the ‘did it/is it really happened/ing ‘ is our brains protecting us? I’m certainly trying much harder to be kind to myself in this pre-radiotherapy period as my body seems to be screaming for rest. Quite why I thought I needed to push on through during chemo, I’m not sure!
Head up, keep charging
I also agree that it doesn’t feel like it’s happening to me. If I have to tell someone new what I’m going through I find the words catch in my throat and my voice goes funny. It makes it too real saying it out loud, even after 9 months since diagnosis.
Its strangely reassuring that so many of us feel the same about the unrealness of it all. Goodness knows the treatment is real and its royally kicked my ass but I didn’t know I had cancer until they told me I had it, and I felt fine. Now I feel and look ancient but still don’t feel anything from the actual cancer. Its all the pills and zapping that I know I need but don’t have a clue if its worked.
Trust in the process… thats all we can do I guess. I don’t want to live the rest of my life terrified so Im going to do my best to only freak out around scans and in between I’ll try to pretend its not happened at all.
Wish me luck for that. I’m almost a year since I was diagnosed, so I’ll try to pop back in a year and see how Ive done with this theory! xx
Hi all, totally relate to all your comments. The whole year feels unreal. Good to hear more on your radiotherapy experiences too, very much appreciated. I’ve now had my full axillary clearance, another three week wait for the results now. Last chemo was four weeks tomorrow and apart from surgery soreness and drain, I feel that my body is getting stronger.
I’m very impressed with your padel sessions @warmfuzzies - amazing stuff. Good luck @twinks77 for your surgery next week.
Nice to see we are moving on with treatments. Still getting so tired as soon as I try and do something energetic. And aching in all my joints. I wonder how long this lasts for after chemo. I am nearly 3 weeks post last chemo and the aching is getting worse. I can see others are experiencing the aching too! @rach49 Its comforting to know you are feeling more energetic.
I too feel like it is all so surreal and that we will be forever be wondering if it will come back or have spread. How will we know? I had no symptoms of this cancer other than a barely noticeable lump that I was lucky to have felt. They are not all obvious to feel.
Anyway I know I am lucky. I have the family over on Saturday for a belated Thanksgiving dinner (american husband) - there is a lot to be thankful for this year!
Surgery booked for 11th December and just had appointment through for radioactive dye the day before. Be great to get it all done before Christmas!
Good luck with your surgery @twinks77. At least they will be sure to get it all out.
Love to you all and Happy Thanksgiving
Yes x