Just diagnosed 38 years old

[bluesatsuma]

Hi @hanb1. Sorry you find yourself here, but as you’ve already seen, you are not alone.

Your initial diagnosis is almost identical to mine, and I too found that 2 lymph nodes were affected after being told the axilla looked fine on ultrasound.

I went on to have a second op to remove them and 2 more tumours found in the margins. For me, I decided to have them out as I felt I’d always wonder if anymore were affected. A year on, and no sign of dreaded lymphodema as yet.

I ended up having a third op as my margins werent clear. Then at a results meeting, my surgeon dropped in that a radiologist had reviewed my original mammogram and identified another tumour!

My surgeon wanted me to get chemo done and then I had a mastectomy and reconstruction. I’m now 4 days into radiotherapy.

The news that I’d need chemo shocked me, and i worried about my kids too. They were 9, 11 and 15. Now a few months on, I can honestly say they have been amazing. And chemo is not the horror story that the media would have you believe. Yes I lost my hair, yes I was tired and felt rough. But I was active, attended gigs, lunched with friends and parented as normal.

You can do it! You’ll be amazed how tough you are, and how tough your kids are!

Younger Women Together | Breast Cancer Now…_gsMQ…&gclid=Cj0KCQjwzrzABhD8ARIsANlSWNPVM6pRwUesQ79lHGnTp21dIT9naGVRYZcc2IuB1hpGUSTp-iSS3TsaAoEOEALw_wcB

There is also a forum group for women between 18 and 45.

You sound very proactive getting another appointment with your consultant to ask further questions and I think that is very wise. Unfortunately with this disease, there can be lots of twists and turns in the path, but you will be fine. I’m coming out the otherside now and I feel really well.

All the best x

[gabby]

Diagnosis age 42, IDC grade 3, stage 1, had DMX with clear margins, 11 lymph nodes removed, all clean thank God. No chemo or radiation needed as subtype was ER+, PR+, HER-. I only have to take Tamoxifen for 5 years. Super happy with the aesthetic closure with free nipple graft (like a breast lift & breast reduction in one), I was told if HER+ or Triple Negative, chemo would be unavoidable. With lymph nodes metastasis, radiation would also be unavoidable. DMX also helped avoid chemo/radiation.

[methnic]

Hello there,
I’m sorry to hear you’ve landed here. I just thought I’d get in touch as I was also 38 at diagnosis and my children were aged 11 (son) and 9 (daughter). I was heartbroken at the thought of leaving them and them having to know about this horrible illness at their young age, so gave myself a few days to get over the feelings of panic before I told them, with my husband. We told them after tea and as they were getting up from the table I reminded them very calmly and straightforwardly that I’d been to the breast unit recently and that I’d been diagnosed with breast cancer. They asked what would be happening and I explained what I knew already and promised them I would be honest about what was happening. I let them know it was OK to tell people and OK not to, but I would tell their teachers what was happening in case they needed support at school. We involved them whenever we could and kept info honest, so that when I got upset etc they could understand why.
They weren’t fazed by it, and throughout treatment just took things on board.
I thought I would share my experience with you in the hope that its helpful.
I’ll be thinking of you x

[sim2]

Hi so sorry to hear you are in this situation. I’m also 38 and in a similar boat. I just don’t have kids, so to some degree it’s easier I suppose…( other than having to make a decision about any possibilities to have kids in the future in a very feisty rush)…

I too was first told that I only need a lumpectomy and radio, but then a lymphnode was found with cancer so I got all axillary lymph nodes cleared. They took 22 out and found cancer in 3.

It’s very much your decision. My surgeon recommended clearance right away once we knew one of the lymph nodes has cancer. This is because from the lymphatic system it can easily travel elsewhere, so better to be safe than sorry. Core risk is lymphoedema really… some nerve damage, but I so far was very lucky…

I’m on Chemo now for 6 months, will then need radiotherapy to the breast and armpit, and then hormone therapy.

But to be true, the whole cancer situation is so uncontrollable and somewhat unpredictable, that eventually I just decided to trust the universe and go with doctors advice.

Ask all the questions about the risks of the different therapies/ options and that will enable you to make the best decision suitable for you.

Sending you love!!! We have many years to come cancer free. It’s tough now but we can do it!

[brincat]

I was also 38 when first diagnosed with 3 diff lumps in left breast with 1 involved lymph node, her2 possitive, Her2 negative and Estrogen responsive. I also have 2 children 7 and 10.
We are a year on now and still going but children are so resilient and have been amazing an even had a fun session trying on wigs. Luckily through cold capping even though was painful I managed to not go bald and my hair just became very thin. I did lose hair everywhere else, eyelashes, eyebrows etc but just learnt to draw some on haha.
So far we have done 6 rounds of 4 diff chemo drugs. I then had a mastectomy with tissue expander put in place and results came back as still slight signs showing in the node so i faced the same decision as you. Radiation or lymph node removal. We talked it over lots with the consultant and booked in with BC nurse for a chat too an decided to have another op for the full lymph node removal. It’s a strange sensation with it being like numb / pins an needles but able to move arm etc an still have some Physio to ensure full movement will return. I also asked at that time what the majority of the team thought was best and in my case they agreed node removal was. Now on more chemo 14 cycles of kadcyla an few other injections thrown in along the way before having my implant surgery and fingers crossed that will be the end then.
The hardest parts along the journey has been the decision making when it is put in your hands so totally understand your post as it is very frustrating and confusing to decide such big decisions. I’m sure you will get there though with the right decision for you x