Just diagnosed yesterday

I have hardly slept a wink and had terrible night sweat when I did sleep.
I’m 40 this year. I was initially told, when I went for the scans and biopsy that they were not concerned about the presentation and feel of the lump and they strongly thought it was a fibroanoma. So for 2 weeks I was relieved thinking it was going up be confirmed.

Yesterday the first thing the surgeon told me what he had a ‘nasty surprise’. I have grade 3, 2 cm bc lump oestrogen neg and progesterone neg and we are just waiting her2 results. We are waiting for me to have my next period so I can have an MRI and surgery to remove lump at the end of May. Possible chemo and radio later on. The news hit me like a nuclear bomb. I couldn’t hear what they were saying. I asked lots of questions. I’m trying to be hopeful and it’s good to read comments on this forum. I feel sick and my heart is beating like mad. I can’t stop crying.

Mimi

 

Hello and welcome to this lovely forum, not somewhere any of us would choose to be, but one thing is for sure you will get loads of help and support from the wonderful ladies on here.

 

This is a lot to take in especially when the thinking previously was that it was not bc.  The way you are feeling is totally natural, give yourself time to take in what you have been told, we are all here for you to support you in whatever way we can.  And you are right you will see that there are ladies who have the same/similar diagnosis as you and they are many years past diagnosis.  The night sweats will be your body reacting to the news and your anxiety levels will be high so that will not help.  I am not sure if you work, but if so are you able to take a couple of days off. 

 

Come on here to rant, rave, cry, ask questions, there will always be someone who can help. 

 

Sending you lots of hugs

 

Helena xxx

Hi mimi. Know the feeling so well and fully understand how you are feeling. Crying it normal and does help release the emotions a little. The anxiety gremlin is a pain in the ass and appears out of nowhere. I am further down the road than yourself but thought this might help even if only a tiny bit. This forum is amazing and you can ask anything and I mean anything even if it’s things you can’t talk to those close to you about. Someone will help. The advice I remember so well given by more than one of these amazing champions is take each day as it comes. Sounds easy I know but it works, just focus on today and if it’s a good day cherish it and if not so good then you will get through this also. Try not to look to far ahead and especially those “what if’s”. Once you plan is in place it helps. We don’t want to be here but this is a great forum with so much support and advice. Take care and we can beat this. I often come back to this forum as do quite a few who I have met on this roller coaster do and we are now in the treatment thread and still supporting each other and now hopefully giving a little reassurance and support to the newly diagnosed.

Thank you Helena and Gill. I’ve signed myself off work for a week. As I can’t do my job whilst I’ve been hit by the diagnosis. I’m becoming more hopeful. I’m prioritising myself and making a plan to eat well etc. We will beat this! Xxx

Hi there, morning. Be easy on yourself and do take it one day at a time. Twelve years ago I was exactly in the same place as you. Lumpectomy, Chemo ands rads followed by 5 years tabs. Got through it still here. For the chemo I elected for the cold cap, this was my choice and as it happened I lost all my hair from the neck down and kept all above the neck. So for many months I did not have to do the leg waxing bit and armpits so there are plusses however small.Hugs Cazzy 

Another little bit of advice. I know we are all individuals and handle/cope In very different ways. But … I didn’t thread hop I stayed here then went to treatment thread once I had my surgery. Now on the waiting carousel for test results and will either be the chemo thread or rads thread. Hoping it’s the latter. As with questions to your surgeon write them down as you will sure forget once in that room and again your surgeon will soon see how much or how little info you need. I just went with it and I was told all I needed to know with most of my questions being answered. Again try and stay away from Mr google. Hmmm wonder why we call it a Mr? The only thing I have googled is cording symptoms of which I don’t have as nipped in to see my bcn to confirm so didn’t need google anyway. Oh I am rambling but hope it helps. And this big knickers are great and yes have huge pockets x

I’ve learned not to go on Google apart from to access this forum as the nurse gave me the breast cancer care folder. It’s been so comforting reading through the posts in this bit of the forum. I have not moved onto to the other forums until I’m undergoing treatment. I just want to take things one day at a time. But I just wish I could just get on and have surgery to get this thing out of me. But the breast clinic have stated they still need to run further MRI. So I just have to wait and trust they are doing their best for me.

I love your humour is made me laugh and cry. Not many people can do that!!

Thank you all. This means so much to me. Xxx

Hi Mimi,
Not much further on than you, only just over a week since diagnosis. Massive shock, had convinced myself it was anything but, doctors gave nothing away when doing scans and biopsy. MRI 2 days after diagnosis but then over a week wait to next appointment, now finally coming up on Monday. They didn’t say what type I have, only that it’s stage 2, I assumed they didn’t know. I’m 38 with 2 kids 7 and 9 so really not expecting it, plus my mum has advanced melanoma and my dad died in September :frowning: it’s not been a good few months. Keep coming on here and we can chat. I’ve held it together at work just about this week but fell apart this evening at home. Had Chinese, glass of wine and now bath :slight_smile: I’ve found the Headspace app really helpful by the way. xxx

Hi Kitkat,
I’m a bit worried as the MRI was done just over a week ago and I said as I have a mirena coil that I don’t really know when my period’s due. But a few days after I had the scan I got a light period, so now I’m worried the results won’t be as accurate as they could be. I’ll mention it at my appointment on Monday, but I’m not sure how much it matters? xx

Mai I read your blog it’s amazing. It brought me a lot of comfort and reassurance that I needed and it helped to improve my understanding about what I am probably going to go through. I’m also focusing on nutrition. I’ve already cut out alcohol and I’m making veggie based smoothies and I’m plant based. I’m vegetarian anyhow. But I’ve dumped dairy. I’m getting plenty of green veg and raw broccoli and carrot with cucumber and kale with spices and pea protein shake in the blender.

KitKat my surgeon and nurse told me I could not have the MRI until my next period had finished. They said it’s because there are hormonal changes in the breast which don’t go unnoticed if you have MRI. They told me this after I begged for them to arrange the MRI asap. But I have to wait until the 17. I wish you all the best in your recovery. Xx

Ladybowler I feel so happy for you and congratulations. I will just go with the flow whilst taking the greatest care I can of my physical and emotional Well being. Xxx

Keep running. I’ve been signed off work for 3 months but the go said she could give me 6! I could not do my job and be going through this. I’m a social worker but I think I’m gonna quit this job now. As I think the stress of the job is behind all this. I don’t care now I could work in a library or Tesco. I just want to have an easier life. This has been a wake up call. Xx

Hi Mimi,
Just take the time you need & see how you go. It is a wake up call, but it’s still early days. I also work in a similar field & am now back in the same role but part time - although I was planning to do this anyway.
I know of a few colleagues who’ve been through this & have returned to work & are getting on with things as usual.
ann x

Hi Ann I’m glad you are back at work doing your job. I was told by the mac nurse that they get many women from social care, nursing and teaching and policing backgrounds through their doors. She stated although there is not slot of research about cancer and stress she can see the link with us lot going in with our lumps! I’ve had too many wake up calls. I had sepsis twice last year and diabetes. I feel I just want to leave my job and find another job which serves the community but in another way. Xx