Hi I’m new to this, decided today that actually I do think it would be good to talk to people going through the same thing. I’ve been hiding away until now.
I had my first fec 2 weeks ago and i’m due to have my second lot next wednesday. I think I have only just accepted what is happening to me, its been a bit of a struggle.
And now my hair is falling out! It started a few days ago and now it is coming out ALOT! I don’t know whether to shave it off or keep it as long as I can,I feel really scared and very vulnerable. i know that losing my hair is the least of my worries when dealing with breast cancer but somehow it is making me feel very, very afraid.
Is anyone going through the similar emotions? Does anyone have any advice?
Hi there
Welcome to the site, you will find so much support on here from very understanding people i can assure ypu.
I was in your position on New Years Eve last year. Two weeks after the first FEC my hair was coming away in handfuls.
What i did (which i do not think i would do again if i ever had too) was too just let it come out (wore a hat to collect loose hairs), until there was nothing much left, then i shaved the rest.
I ordered a wig (similar in colour and style to my own hair) and put that on for the whole of the winter.
Now, my hair is very very short and i am trying to get used to my new look.
I totally understand how you feel about feeling vulnerable and afraid, as i felt the same.
I wish you well …
Naz xx
Kateog my advice is to cut it and shave your head. You will soon get used to wearing scarves or hats and sometimes a wig. I couldn’t stand the hair falling out in bits and it was such a mess. It is quite liberating really and I can be up and out of the house in no time.
Hi Kateog
I just wanted to say hello and send support- what you are going through is horrible. I finished treatment last year. Mine fell out shortly after my first chemo, and I think however prepared you are for it, there is nothing that can prepare you-if that makes sense? It brought a lot of my fears and questions to the fore as well, and made everything feel very real-I really understand what you say about how you feel. Advice is hard because I know so many women who have tackled it differently. What I did was shave it off-for me it gave me an element of control, and I thought I looked less ‘ill’ with none than straggly bits. I did get a wig, but didn’t like it, so I wore scarves throughout.
Wishing you well for the next part
C xx
Yes its horrible, even though you are expecting it I think we all think it won’t happen and when it does it is a shock.
I agree take control, get rid of it - if its anything like what happened to me it wasn’t my hair anymore, it was dry and just fell about everywhere. get it shaved and get in control its less traumatic
I have now got used to having no hair and wear my wig for work etc but scarves around the house, not brave enough for the bald look I am afraid but maybe that will come
take care xx
Hi
I agree with what the others have said. Mine started to fall out 2 wks after 1st chemo, so I got it shaved off. That was last winter and it was a bit cold. Wore a wooly hat in bed! I finished chemo in March and my hair is now about 2 inches long.
Julia xx
Hi
We are in v similar positions. I have my 2nd chemo on tues and my hair is starting to fall out. I decided a few weeks ago to get my v long hair cut to a bob to give my children the chance to get used to me looking different. Now I have started wearing hats and bandanas around the house- my little boy says I look like a pirate. It is his 3rd birthday party on Sunday and if my hair lasts til then, that is the cut off point. I am getting it shaved off before my onc app on Monday.It does not feel like my hair anymore anyway. Have you looked at suburban turbans there are are some quite nice hat options. My wig is hideous so I think it will be hats and scarves for me. Good luck with your treatment and I hope your hair grows back quickly after. debx
It’s awful when your hair starts coming out. I used cold cap but the same as deb, it started coming out and I got sick of checking my pillow and shower for hairs plus I got obsessed with pulling bug clumps gently out and sayins to whoever was ther “see it comes out so easily” . I kept it as it was until I had been to my dons fifth birthday party. The next day I got my friend to cut it then shave it to number three. Was such a relief. That was day 19 after first fec. I have done three fec and am on day 8 after first tax now. Still have 30pc coverage plus those bits have grown and I have stubble that has grown too! Very odd! You learn to deal with it but it’s a bit like test results where the waiting is the worst and the reality is more copeable. I had my wig cut at Trevor sorbie which made a huge difference to how it looked and how I felt about it. I only wear it for trips out. In the house it’s bare head or bandana. One mistake I made was wearing a stripey top with a headscarf. Just don’t. You look like a pirate! Good luck xxxx
Hi Vickie, l have some pirate eye patches that belong to the grandchildren, l sure they will share with you, if you want to play pirates!
Anyway, Hair! l am on day 6 of FEC 2, and was wondering if all my hair will come out? and if not why not?
You are on your 1st TAX, thought l had read somewhere on here their hair started to grow on TAX, or was that wishful thinking!
Met a lady yesterday, she finished her chemo a year ago in June, and she had a lovely head of hair, she was thrilled with her hair, said it is the best it has ever been. and no it wasn’t grey! but then again she was only 39.
Sandra x
Hi
Sandra, mine did start to grow again on Tax-couldn’t see it, but could feel it just before my last cycle, was very odd to feel stubble after being hairless for so long. A friend who has only just finished tax already has a good few inches.
All the best
C x
ace, that would do me just fine! would have hair at christmas at that rate!
Hi There,
I would have to agree with the ladies who shaved their hair off, i had mine shaved off after my 2nd Fec as it was coming out in clumps, i felt alot better afterwards, i to have a wig that i haven’t worn but i wear headscarves, which i have now got used to, i would have had my 4th FEC LAST WEEK BUT IT HAD TO BE POSTPONED TO NEXT WEEK DUE TO BLOODS, BUT I HAVE NOTICED MY STUBBLE is now growing back, weird
I am used to having no hear now, i never ever thought i would say that, but as you say, it’s the least of your worries, try not to get to upset about it like i did, as for me it really wasn’t as bad as i thought it would be.
Best of luck,
Sandrae x x x
Hiya,
I shaved all mine off today! I was completely going to pieces with it falling out slowly. I felt like I was leaving a trail of hair everywhere I went. I’d already cut it short. I used to have a long bob and had it cut to a short crop.
I hadn’t planned to shave it off today, but I’d been out for a couple of hours and when I came back my little boy hugged me and came away covered in hair. He was really upset and kept apologising for hurting me. I felt awful for letting it get that bad. So I got my husband to clipper it all off.
Made me feel much better, If I’m honest I don’t like the way it looks but it’s doable I can definately get used to it and I already feel better. I feel back in control already.
Good luck and I hope you find a way that works for you,
Joxx
Good for you jo, that’s one job you have successfully done and won’t have to do again . My boys have got used to my hair with no probs but my son said to me at his assembly on Friday " hey mummy you’ve got your pretend hair on today" , ace , just what you want in front of the class!!!
Oh my!! We can always count on them to let the cat out of the bag can’t we!!
On a recent shopping trip my youngest asked the sikh gentleman serving us if he had taken the yucky medicine that made his hair fall out. I tried to explain but three proved a bit young for a discussion on theology. The young man (bless him he can’t have been more that 24) was very sweet and helped me out a great deal but oh boy if there had of been sweets handy i would have given them to him to shut him up.
Joxx
Hi, i think im feeling the same has you, i had my second dose of fec last tues and omg its hard! my hair started to come out 2wks after my first dose and i got so fedup with it i shaved it off. wow what relief it was. felt alot happier and cleaner lol. I am now finding it hard to cope with the tiredness. Not used to lying about but i cant seem to do much else. Is anyone else having the same problem?
Despite using the cold cap my hair fell out day 20 after first fec on 28th April, I thought I was coping well with dx, surgery etc, but seeing my lovely hair end up in a tesco carrier bag just tipped me over and I sat and sobbed. That was the lowest point, now wearing nice hats, buffs and a wig I have got used to it and my boys don’t seem to care. I always make an effort with my make up despite having no lashes/brows left either. Sending you a big hug. Tina
Hi everyone, sorry its been a while, been battling my demons a little bit! Have been struggling.
It is FEC number 3 for me tomorrow, scared as hell, I hate it. Have apanic attack each time i go!
Anyway, i shaved my hair before my second dose. Well my kids did it if i’m honest. Thought it would make them less scared! My wig isn’t working for me, scarves I’m sure about (not sure if i look like a pirate or like i’m going to tell your fortune lol) so I’m going bald most of the time which is sometimes ok and sometimes i feel very self concious. But I’m try ing to ‘rock’ the look as my sister says.
But sometimes i feel so cold, don’t know if it is because i have no hair, so i have to wear my wooly hat. In summer! talk about drawing attention to yourself hey!
take care
kate x
I too have been hiding away a bit, but am going to have my third and final FEC tommorow, bloods permitting. After that there will be 3 cycles of TAX and steroids to get through.
Lost most of my hair after the first treatment! It just kept coming away in my hands and blocking the plughole when I showered, so had it cut shorter, but it was still all over my pillow like some great big hairy dog moulting! So I did the sensible thing and just used my husbands clippers to get rid of the last bit and I now have stubble instead of hair, but no more messy pillows. I agree with you Kate about the cold, I have a lovely short blonde wig, but walking home the other day it was a very cold wind and the back of my head was so cold I had to wrap it up in a wooly scarf when I got in! Took ages to get warm again. I have also bought a couple of warm wooly hats and will be wearing them plus wig if I need to. As for rocking the scarves, they can be a bit more comfy (and warmer) than the wigs can’t they? Friends keep telling me they look fab etc, but not convinced, don’t know about rocking the look mine is definitely a bit rocky. At least I’m saving on time doing my hair in the mornings and money on shampoo, hairspray, conditioner, etc etc… he he he
wishing you all well
Av xxx
HI
I bought my first wig when my hair first started to fall out and tries to replace the long hair that i had lost, my brother treated me by paying for me to go to a very expensive salon and now i don’t wear it he is offended! OMG it is so hard to keep everyone happy and think about me too.
The guilt is driving me mad some days, what with the kids, husband, friends, parents and now my brother!! AAAARRRGGGGHHH
lol
Kate x