The date is finally here. Tomorrow I say goodbye to my left boob and also having an axillary node clearance. I’ve got a 45mm stage 2 IDC which is a lump but also has a diffuse section and is ER positive, PR positive, HER2 negative, an area of DCIS and the IDC is in one lymph node that they know of. I was diagnosed in October and have had mammograms, MRI, core biopsy, stereotactic biopsy, node core biopsy.
I’m not overly bothered about having an op itself as I’ve had ops for other things before, but waking up and knowing I’ll look different is feeling very heavy. I’ve chosen to delay reconstruction so I can get the treatment for the cancer done more quickly and not have the worry about radiotherapy affecting any reconstruction.
How have others managed to navigate the emotional feelings when they wake up? Until now I’ve put my feelings in a box and carried on with life as normal - no point worrying about what I can’t change, type of thing.
And a different question, although I feel very mean and ungrateful for this part, did anyone else feel suffocated by the constant check ins and “Are you ok?” “How are you feeling?” questions from everyone? I know they genuinely mean well and it’s coming from a kind place but 9 people in one day this week. It just feels a lot!
Hi im just over 2 weeks post single mastectomy and yes without sounding mean it is completely suffocating, my family would not leave my side and I just wanted to scream at times as their overbearing kindness, sympathy, tears was really hard as I am as a rule a ‘tough cookie’ and fiercely independent. It comes from love and you will have more to come as you recover!
All the best for you surgery, i breezed through the day was first one down and home at 5pm no drains and manageable pain, message me if I can answer any questions or to swap notes with me being a couple of weeks ahead of you x
Hi @2kittens I didn’t have a mastectomy so can’t help on the first question but with regard to the smothering, what might work is telling your close family prior to the surgery that you have been advised that there will be fatigue as your body expends its energy on healing the wounds and it will be best for you to pace yourself during recovery. Because of this, you’d prefer to let people know how you’re doing and if you need anything as and when anything changes. Ask the nearest and dearest to spread the word. WhatsApp groups are your friend. Good luck with it all.
Mine is on Tuesday and I totally feel the same - it’s really good to hear that others have been up and not feeling too bad after it as it’s putting a massive dampener on Christmas. I am first up on Tuesday and they said I should be home on the 24th and I am trying not to go to worst case scenario of being in hospital at Christmas.
I’ve been getting a lot of ‘you are tough, you will get through this, you’re strong’ when I dont feel strong, just really angry. Not sure if that helps, guess I want to say I feel the same and it’s really shit. I have become a lot more sweary in the last few weeks
I had a right mastectomy and total node clearance 5 years ago. My most used phrase when people asked after me was: “bearing up”, with or without under the strain, given the circumstances blah, blah, blah added.
If the 9 people are in the same group ask if only 1 can ask you for updates and say you are finding it overwhelming to deal with so many well-meaning/caring (important words of choice) people. Do that for any group of people if it helps.
I’d had previous ops with big, ugly scars and I found that helped looking at my op. I didn’t have a recon. and I still don’t. My scar was lovely from day 1 and is hardly visible now.
I hope everything goes well and you recover quickly and easily.
I’m home! Had mastectomy yesterday morning, was pretty nervous going in but then woke up and it was all done and the pain hasn’t been that bad all. Back home at lunchtime today and just sitting on the sofa watching everyone else playing Mario kart while I relax.
If I don’t move there’s no pain but even when moving the pain is bearable, they gave me drugs to take home but haven’t had to have the strong ones yet.
I did lots of group texts this morning but closed off further questioning with a ‘hope you all have a lovely Christmas’. Now the waiting til the 15 Jan for results, but am hopeful - the consultant (in her Christmas jumper) said enjoy a cancer free Christmas so I am clinging to that.
So glad you are home Ruby. Happy Cancer free Christmas
Take those strong painkillers if you can, even if you can half it alongside regular paracetamol. My pain levels just for a lumpectomy and nodes got a bit worse before it got better. I don’t know if this was my adrenaline going down and the hospital drugs wearing off or me doing a bit too much. So slow and steady wins the race. big hugs
I am taking all the painkillers and prune juice which is doing the trick - the BCN made me very fearful of constipation so be downing the juice like it’s wine, except tastes horrible!
Pain is bearable but it’s an emotional rollercoaster, crying at everything which is confusing everyone - I’ve never spent so much time lazing around which isn’t good for spiraling thoughts. I think the nodes are more sore than the actually mastectomy but it all feels weirdly numb, trying to psych myself up for a shower as feel a bit gross now
Well done for getting through it! The pain and sensations are a bit strange here 9 days on - sometimes throb, sometimes disappear, sometimes feel nipple contraction where there is no nipple anymore!! Managed to get out for a walk most days - it’s not nearly as bad as I thought it would be in recovery so far.
Like you I am trying not to think to hard about results day and just getting on with what I can. Longing for a proper shower but managing to do my hair in the sink and bottom half in the shower!!
I’m managed a shower with the help of partner, least sexy experience ever but feel so much better now I am clean
Hair is still disgusting but that’s for another day. Actually worked out well it being over Christmas as can wear PJs every day and no one can complain.
