message for DilysP
message for DilysP Hi Dilys
I hope that you are ok today and I hope everything went ok at the hospital…I have been so tired and very ratty today for some reason, I felt like my blood level has been dropping quicker this time…and I feel a bit nauseous, but then you cant have it all ways I guess…
I sometimes think I take four steps forward and three steps back,my implant has also been hurting for some reason…I just can’t wait to feel normal as normal is again…
sorry to moan
Lots of Love
Lucy
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Hallo Lucy Dearest Lucy
Fighting with my cat Trevor to get to the keyboard. So sorry you are not feeling so good. You have all my love and strength with you, and I think of you so very much. May be this is how it goes?
OK today at the hospital. They drained stuff that didn’t need to be there and then started to inflate the implant! Felt weird and was so covered in iodine that no bra and falsie has been possible today. I think of it as a step forward. And they are bringing forward the heart echo test and liver scan so I can start chemo asap. Can hardly wait (ho ho).
Lucy love you are so much further through this than I am and you are doing so well. Keep your head up and know that you are loved. I know how hard it has been so far and will be there with you as it goes on.
Hope Pauline is having a great time in Weymouth.
Much love and strength
Dilys
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Hi Dilys
Glad that you are ok…and everything went smoothly for you at the hospital…when I used to have my seroma drained they said you shouldnt feel a thing I felt the needle go in everytime that is one of the reason’s I left it in the end…I used to have to hang onto mums hand and squeeze it like mad…thankfully those days are over…
The implant is a bit of a pain, it can be uncomfortable at times especially in bed and it can feel heavy too,mine was over inflated when I had the operation and I have never had it filled since I had a bit drained and my consultant said I need to have it filled before rads as it distorts it, when I have chemo it goes soft for some reason, about a week later it goes hard again, it is so weird what my body seems to get up to… I think I could write a book on it…
Not really what you wanted to hear about the chemo I am sure, but the way I looked at it Dilys was the sooner it started the sooner it ended, I cant believe when I started it dragged and I never saw an end to it, but the last two have just flown by and I will soon enough be on the last one and like you know I cant wait…one more time of possibly but hopefully not feeling rubbish and sick .
Trevor bless him…I was offered 2 kittens the other day but I dont think that I am ready for that yet although I would have loved to have said yes, I do miss my cat, I think they really special and they give love unconditionally…
At least Pauline hasnt had rain well I hope she hasnt it has been warm for her…so at least she can go out and about…
thank you for the kind words Dilys I really do appreciate your support and ditto…
Lots of Love Lucy
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Hi Lucy Dearest Lucy
Today has turned out lovely and hope it is as nice in Weymouth for Pauline. Have been a bit sore today but nothing major so can’t complain really. Also if I run my nails round my abdomen it makes my arm tingle. Very odd feelng indeed.
I am about to be deluged by visitors from tomorrow onwards which I am dreading a bit. But I am working on the principle of not pushing people away when they are taking all that trouble. Just hope I don’t suddenly get the heart and liver appointments just when people are coming! Hope to hear about those tomorrow.
And also tomorrow my sister in law is coming with me on a wig buying spree, which oddly I am lookng forward to. I noticed on one website that you can even buy false eyebrows! Perhaps not!
No I am not looking forward to chemo but feel a bit prepared. I will do as I have been doing and just take it a day at a time. Not much choice really, is there? As you have discovered, oh stronger better person!!!
How is it today? Hope you are feeling ok. You should think about those kittens. My Trevor is nearly 18 and getting very skinny but we still love him to pieces.
Much love Lucy my dear
Dilys
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hello Hi Dilys
I feel a lot better today thank you, just a bit weak and light headed, I know what you mean about being over run by visitors the only thing I found was they seem to think that you are better than you are because I don’t look ill… or I didnt and that did concern me, people do get the wrong impression…
shopping is good for the soul even if it is for wigs its makes you feel better I know I did some retail therapy I thought well what the heck I cant take money with me so spend it…
Chemo is Yuk but you can do it Dilys, just look at me I never thought I could, I wanted to give up at the first hurdle, screamed and shouted and cried but am still going strong, have to have my blood test for diabetes tomorrow so nothing to eat from 18.30 tonight which is not nice…hum didnt some one say they hated being told about it would make them a stronger better person…I dont think so, I dont know where an earth people get that assumption from…
I have false eyelashes not worn them though they are more trouble than they are worth I just line the rim of my inner eye at the top with black or brown eyeliner pencil…my lower lashes and brows have just thinned not fallen out completely, so I just touch them up with brow pencil etc…
I will get another cat again one day just not sure now is the right time really…
yes weather is nice hope Pauline has the same in Weymouth, dad said it is due to break tomorrow though but you know what they are like never get anything right…
Love
Lucy
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Oh I am so fed up of hair product adverts and long lashes from Max Factor…I cant wait to be able to use mascara again…
Dearest Lucy Hi there Lucy
I was really really teasing about the stronger better person! I thought I was ok as I was before all this, as I am sure you were. So glad you are feeling ok-ish my love. You have taught me to expect the reality not the myth and for that alone I will be eternally grateful. And I am so trying to enjoy what I have now before it all starts. I’ll let you know about the wig tomorrow.
Don’t know about you but I NEVER noticed women’s breasts before all this. Now I do notice. Not in a weird way but just that they are there, both of them! Keep wanting to tell people how lucky they are. But of course they might be nursing something worse. And know just what you mean about those shampoo adverts. I have always had thin (sorry, fine!) hair but have always been addicted to thickening shampoo.
Isn’t it a lovely evening? Busy day tomorrow as we have to go and get a new wing mirror for the car in the morning before my sister in law arrives at 12.30. For once I will get my lazy self out of bed. And this from someone who until this lot happened was up at 6am every morning for work! There are some benefits…
Love you and take care
Dilys
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Hi Dilys
Yes I know you were teasing me…but it really does put a different prespective on life once you have gone through chemo…you think my God I have done that and nothing seems to seem the same again…if you can get through that I think that you can deal with anything… I dont think it makes you stronger it just opens your eyes to what is important and what isnt, it also makes you want to do things and see things that you just thought about but never did…
There is reality…I always think it is better to be prepared for the worst and anything that is better than that is a bonus that way you cant get too disallusioned with it other wise you will drive yourself nuts…I have good times and bad, this time hasnt been too bad for me, the sickie feeling is subsiding touch wood and I feel like I did when I had the 2 chemos that were semi ok…
I have also followed the advice of my chemo nurse this time and she had advised me not to eat dairy products, which I had done after the previous chemo…i dont know if that has made a difference or what is the reasoning behind it…
The only thing I think about now with other women is are you going around without checking your breasts and do you have a lump that you dont even know about, I bet the people I work with still don’t check even after what has happened to me and it doesnt matter if you are old or young you are still at risk if you dont check regularly, I now check my other breast often…I was lucky I got pain with mine and you rarely do apparently, so I count myself very lucky indeed… but I often wonder how many are going around and it will be too late for them through sheer ignorance…which I think is very sad.
I hope you have a great day tomorrow, do what you can while you can and just take each day as it comes, that is the best way…when I have chemo I know I am going to have a week of weakness where the mind is willing but the body isnt so I just try to take it easy even though it is hard as I always like to be active with work or such like.
have to have that blood test tomorrow, not sure how they are going to get the blood I dont really have any veins now that are accessible, it seems so daft to me that your veins have to be put through this there must be a better way and I’m sure there will be one day.
oh well very tired and off to bed, hungry but fasting for blood test so night night…
Love as always
Lucy
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Morning Lucy Dear Lucy
Hope the blood test goes well today. I am going wig shopping shortly, but have had to postpone my evening visitor as the hospital rang to invite me for a liver scan this evening at 1820. Sounds so much fun I could hardly refuse. So I am joining you in the fast from 12 this afternoon.
Lots of love and more later. And isn’t the weather being kind for Pauline? Hope she is able to make the most of it.
Loads of love
Dilys
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Afternoon Dilys Hello dear Dilys
Your post just caugt my eye, concerning your liver scan.
I had one last week and wasn’t told to fast so please, when you have yours later, ask why fasting? If I find this is an error I will go squirly as I’m fed up to the back teeth of falling through holes in the health system nets and finding left hand not talking to right hand.
Please and thank you
D
Hi Dahlia Dear Dahlia
OK I’ll ask them. Funnily enough I had one a few years ago and was only told to drink loads of water. Weird eh?
Hope you are ok today?
Much love
Dilys
Hi Dilys
I have had the blood test, it was better than I thought it was going to be, she found the vein straight away and I didnt feel a thing…
I was so ravenous when i got home I could have eaten a horse…I had roamed around all night nearly because I felt hungry and because I felt hungry I felt sickie…what a palava…but it’s done now, so I just have to wait til Tuesday to get the results…
Shame about having to cancel your visitors, sometimes it’s nice to see people outside of your family, not that I am knocking families but its just nice to see other people… at least they are now moving with your tests and things they did seem to get a bit stuck with the operation…I hope that everything goes well…
Yes Fab weather for Pauline, which is nice…It’s so miserable in this country if it rains, as most of the time you spend on holiday here is looking around or I know I do, I like to visit places of interest when I go on holiday here…
well I hope everything goes ok today I dont expect yu will get the results today, will you? or maybe you will but I’m sure they will be just fine…let me know what happens
Lots of Love
Lucy
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Hi Lucy Dear Lucy
Glad it went well for you. I am starvng now but will be off to the hospital again soon so can bear it for now. I am sporting my new wig! Feels very weird but think it looks ok. Just a matter of getting used to the feel of it. Hopefully a few weeks before I actually need it for real.
No I am not expecting results of all these scans until I see the oncologist again next week. Just going with the flow at the moment!
Lots of love and more later
Dilys
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Dear Lucy and Dahlia Dear Lucy
Back from the scan - just seemed routine really. But what with the wig shopping and then all that I am exhausted. What a wimp. Something to eat and then bed I think. Hope you are feeling ok still.
Dahlia - I asked and he said grudgingly it just made it easier to see! Didn’t sound like the end of the world if you had eaten. I was surrounded by the usual water drinking hordes and was worried for a while that I may have misunderstood! So I wouldn’t worry if I were you.
Lots of love
Dilys
Eating pre-scan Hello Dilys (and Lucy)
Thanks for asking that; I’ve been at my wits’ end and that’s a short distance these days.
Glad I cycled this morning when it was nice, raining this p.m. so I’m wimping out for an evening, legs are stiff anyway. Hope it’s dry tomorrow but if not then at least the garden and water butts get something out of it.
Sleep tight, “and don’t let the bugs bite”.
Hi Dilys
Sorry I didnt get back to you yesterday…but I can feel my weak ebb coming on where the blood count etc goes down…I normally wait to take my vit tabs but this time I have decided to take them now…I have checked out as you know with my onc if I can take them and he said yes…I know people read our posts and I dont want people to think I havnt checked it out before hand…
glad that your scan went ok, I hate those ones where you have to drink loads, they made me do that with my gall stone and then I found out it was totally unescessary…I nearly walked out but glad I didnt as I had one the size of a pigeon egg…I did read a thread on here and old thread that they thought maybe b c and gall stones were linked that would figure I only had the gall stone op last June on this week…
oh well the weather has split for Pauline but at least it still isnt cold so thats good…her week has gone quickly, well it has for me I expect it has for her too…
Love as always
Lucy
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Good morning Dear Lucy (and Dahlia)
Sorry you aren’t feelng so good. All I can say is that you are nearly there and will be better enough to put up with the rest of us moaning our way through it when we get started. Or at least I hope so! We haven’t had much rain here - think it did in the night. But it is horribly muggy and sweaty. May be Paulne is doing better by the coast. Her week seems to be racing past, doesn’t it?
I have my visitor this evenng which will be nice. And then two more tomorrow! Only trouble with that is we have been warned that EDF are switching off the electricity from 8 until about 4 in the afternoon for repairs, so that will be a pain. Funny how that would not have worried me one bit while I was at work! It will mean getting my lazy self out of bed for a shower before it goes! Ho hum.
Anyway try to have a restful day and I really hope you feel a bit better.
Much love as ever
Dilys
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Hi Dilys
Yes it rained nearly non stop all night…muggy and horrid here too…Just what you don’t want in weather like this, with the electric being turned off…what will you do about fridge freezer things…
just having some brown plain rice, i have terrible acid heartburn today…caused by the treatment…how wonderful does it ever end…well yes, I have gotten my letter this morning for my rads intial appointment which is the 23rd July for the measure up process etc, then the treatment startrs on the 2nd August so for the first time I can start to plan my life again…Yippee!!! and look forward to going back to work, which I never ever thought I WOULD HERE MYSELF SAY…
I am so looking forward to eat all the things I have missed out on so far…I can taste them already
oh well enjoy your visitors this evening
takecare
Love
Lucy
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Hi Lucy Dearest Lucy
You sound ok! Thank god for that. I was worried about you. My visitor will be here by six - we are going out for an Indian meal which will make you envious! What does being measured up for rads mean? I am months from that but will get there after the chemo.
Out today and bought a new top which I really like from tchibo. Do you have them round your way? Anything to cheer myself up these days! You are so right about retail therapy, even if I can’t really afford it.
Tried hard to rain this afternoon but seems to have passed over now. Still very muggy though.
Much love. If the electricity is off tomorrow I dn’t think I can get on line so probably more on Saturday. You take care my love
Much love
Dilys
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