Black Swan, I had to laugh at your comment about ‘the worst cancer they’d ever seen’! I thought that as well - at every stage I just knew my diagnosis/test results would be far, far worse than they turned out to be. (Although they were bad enough!)
Glad you’re feeling better, ThinLizzie - you will get through this [smile]
Annie x
Glad the scan is over, i am in the same boat had MRI last friday and waiting on results.It was like medieval torture! strange experience, enjoy your wine
When all else fails, wine is definately the answer! Even my medical team agree on that one! The night before my op I was ordered to leave the hospital with my hubby with strict instructions to have two large glasses of wine (no more, no less!) with a meal and return for bedtime at 10pm. It worked a treat and I slept like a log! Which was great cos that was the last time for many a night! Lol. And of course you are worth all the time, money and expertise that’s being thrown at you! Don’t ever think otherwise. I think that we have to be very proud of and grateful to our wonderful NHS.
Thanks for all your encouragement. I aim to take each day at a time and if a day gets too long, then each hour that I have survived the wait, I’ll take as a success! Don’t see much choice in that, so I may as well try to do it in the best possible attitude.
Annie and Black Swan - I cannot even imagine that it IS cancer yet. I am fearful that it might be, but I cannot imagine myself having to deal with it. I tried to look up what the likely types of cancer could be a result of microcalcifications and what the treatments would be (don’t worry - all on this site; learnt my lesson with googling bc!) and tried to look at the video of mx’s. My stomach turned and I had to switch it off! I decided to go through the week blinkered and will look later at what awaits me IF it awaits me.
Powerjen - I did think that surely someone could come up with a quieter way of doing a MRI! I tried to make up adventures that could be related to the clunking and buzzing noises (like taking off in a rocket!) but in the end I just repeated the same 3 words over and over to the beat of the machine. It helped me to calm my breathing. 
How long do you have to wait for your results? I am thinking of you and I am holding your hand virtually - both to encourage you and because I need clinging to someone who is in the same boat as me!
Ann - I first imagined you in your hospital gown in the restaurant (lol)! The wine was a great benefit. I don’t drink a lot anyway but have cut it out almost completely when I started counting calories about 2 years ago. But last night the wine did me a world of good! To hang with calorie counting this week.
This forum is fast overtaking Facebook as my first port of call. My family and friends all live overseas and FB is my link to the world… But I find I am starting to check this forum at least as often as I check FB for updates. You are a great support to me! Thanks!
Hi ThinLizzie,
I had to have an MRI scan after my mammogram, scan and biopsy and agree the waiting is the worst ever. I think it is good that they do this as it shows a much clearer picture of what is going on/or not. Once I was given the results I found it easier to deal with than the waiting. I have just finished chemo and radiotherapy which ended last week. It certainly has been a long hard battle but I can now see some light at the end of this rollercoaster. My family live overseas as well and this forum and support from others in same situation was a lifeline to me. I also enjoyed the wine even through chemo and rads. So we are all on here to support each other and wanted to let you know am thinking of you. Sending virtual hug (((( )))).
Lee X
Hi Lee. Thanks so much for that virtual hug. I return a very gentle but big one back to you.
How do you cope with the family so far away? Do you have enough support here in the UK? We moved into our house 7 years ago (today exactly 7 years ago!) and I have made lots of aquintances and some friends, but not sure how much one can lean on relatively new friends under these circumstances. I still hope that I won’t need to, but the thought did cross my mind. I do hope you have good support - not only here on the forum, but also in real life.
x
Good luck for tomorrow. Hope you get good news. Sending
hugs ((())))
Thanks so much, Ann. I am so nervous and your message cheered me right up! My appt is at 3pm. X
Will be thinking about you and keeping fingers crossed.
Morning ThinLizzie,
Yes got lots of support from my husband who has been great. I think you will be surprised by how your friends will be there for you. Especially the ones who you dont expect it from.
Good luck for this afternoon and fingers (and toes) crossed for good luck.
Take care.
Lee X
Hi.
I got no news.
Not so sure no news is good news in this case… They said between the mammograms, sonar and MRI, they are unable to form a clear picture of what is going on as there are some microcalcifications and some lumps but they don’t all show up on all the images. There are 3 suspect areas. They don’t want to commit to any diagnosis until they’ve got more info, which is fair. They are making an appointment for a MRI guided biopsy in London.
Not sure how I should feel about the fact that the one breast surgeon said that if I decide to go with mastectomy now, we can cut out the MRI guided biopsy and waiting for results! And this before anyone even mentioned the c-word (which they haven’t to date).
So here I go with waiting again. Waiting for apointment and then for the results. Another couple of weeks…
Thanks for you care and concern and thoughts. It is encouraging me no end!
ThinLizzie
Xx
Hi ThinLizzie, I am so sorry you are still waiting, but it will be best in the long run for the medics to have all the information they need to make the best possible decision. Did you ask the surgeon why he said what he did about a mastectomy? If not, I would get in touch and ask him outright. will be thinking about you. Ann.
p.s. remember the wine!
So sorry you are still none the wiser, do you have access to a bcn to talk things over? X
Hi
Ann, my husband and I looked at that incident from all sides (as you do) and decided that it was a case of “lost in translation”. She is not English and she probably didn’t mean it the way it came out! English is not my mothertongue either and I know how it can happen. She was very kind and sweet otherwise. She did not seem very informed about my case, though. And I do wonder if she knows it is cancer but doesn’t know I have not been told. Oh, where the mind goes when you let it! Anyway, I decided that I think it is best to wait for the biopsy results as it is probably an educated guess until they are in. So, I am going to let that be water off the duck’s back. I did sit outside in the sun on Fri eve with the hubby and had a fruity cider or two. Did the spirits a world of good.
Powerjen, I do have bcn (or one of a team). But I don’t know what to ask her/them. I would be asking her to speculate as the question I really want an answer to, is “Is it cancer?” The team would not commit to a diagnosis yesterday (including the one who made the mx comment). They explained why my case is not straight forward and why an MRI guided biopsy is needed. To me it sounded logical, and above all caring, as they feel that would be the quickest and least painful way to get results.
I am feeling remarkably calm. No tears (yet). I do have my own personal super-supply of tears and they are not shy to flow when I am in great shock. But so far nothing. Maybe it is a time bomb waiting for the first professional to say ‘the word’ and open the sluices! But so far, so good.
My mind is in a good place about this. Even the thought that is is likely to be cancer is not freaking me out. The likelihood of a mx isn’t either - at this moment. But boy oh boy, the body doesn’t know it! I think my stomach is my weakest point… after the bloomin’ right breast, that is!
Xx
I just read through this thread again, sort of a ‘check how far I’ve come’ and realise that I have come a long way indeed! I am quite capable of thinking this thing is most likely to be cancer and even that a mastectomy may be needed (but can’t think about the details of what it will entail yet) and I am not falling apart.
I am posting this in case someone else who is newly wondering ‘Do I have cancer?’ will be able to read through this thread and also realise that it does get better. And hopefully take courage from that. I am a real sissy, but with the support I have been getting and the information available, I’ve been able to make it this far!
It is strange how you go from total denial to “maybe” and then to “maybe and if it is I will cope”.
Still hoping for a “No, it’s not” for you!
Lavender
xx
Thanks, Lavender. Yes, it is wonderful how adaptable we are. I think there is a reason there is such a wait between tests and results… It is so that I can get used to the idea! But let’s hope it is a negative result. I am fortunate that there still is a back door open.
I hope that my adaptability keeps going… My mum just called to say my dad is in the same boat as me. He was called to the gp because of a suspicious result re prostate. Further tests are needed to see if it is malignant. I said his sympathy and thoughts were enough. He didn’t have to join me!
X