Hi there, just wanted to ask if anyone else has received negative comments about having a reconstruction. I am just coming to the end of a very long & complicated igap+implant+lipofilling reconstrsuction involving about 6 different operations and having what hopefully will be the last surgery tomorrow. While people were supportive at the start I’m now getting comments along the lines of “why are you having more surgery, you’ll never get it perfect”, “why does it matter anyway, no one sees it”, “why should you expect both breasts to be the same, most women have one bigger than the other” and “you should just be grateful you’re alive & healthy instead of putting your body through unnecessary surgery”. These comments are beginning to really upset me now & making me wish I’d never started on this journey. It has taken 5 years to get to this point, if I had known it was going to take so long I don’t think I would have done it. Just so fed up with it all now 
Aren’t some people insensitive ! Walk a mile in our shoes that’s what I say. I have grade 3 TNBC which isn’t great but I am still really really upset about losing my hair and taking off my acrylic nails ! Call me vain I don’t care that’s me , everyone tells me it should be the least of my worries but I can’t help how I feel! As this is a re-occurrence I put up with loads of rude comments before ,it must be your lifestyle , well not many survive to name a couple of lovely ones I got! I have decided to tell them how rude they are this time if they do it . You are being really strong and doing what’s right for you …you are the one that has to live with all this not them. I’ve had recon this time but it’s all brand new so don’t know how it will end up looking , but if I hate it I will do something about it … Just look after you and your feelings and don’t let these negative people bring you down . We all deal with this however we can, just do whatever you need to get you through …sending massive hugs xxxxx
lbx157 I think you have put up with a lot of cr** from people. They have no right to criticize your choices, and how you decide to do things. I get really upset at the thought of these selfish people saying things like this to you. I’d like to see any of them go through what you have, and still be polite to someone who says “why bother?” Grr.
You are the one that has to live with this. it’s your body. and you know what you need to see under a bra to be comfortable with living. NOone can dictate that to you. Good luck on your journey and I hope you are nearly finished with surgeries.
sorry for the bit of a rant there, but your story hit a nerve there x x
Thank you everyone, your comments have made me feel so much better now. Here’s hoping my surgery tomorrow goes well and I will at long last be “finished” (apart from a little tattooing that is) 