I have been reading all your posts for the past 2 weeks - ever since I discovered a lump in my left breast - and found highly remarkable women here hence I’m turning to you for advice.
I had tests done today (ultrasound, mammography and biopsy) and was told I have bc. I am awaiting the biopsy results next Monday to have a clearer view of the disease and treatment plan. Needless to say, I am very scared and have been in a bad state ever since I discovered the lump. I should add I’m 30, hence nobody believed (GP, nurse) I could have this at first. My parents are very worried too - I am struggling to calm them down. It would be helpful to hear some of your stories and how you’re dealing with this - I always thought of myself as a strong person but right now I’m not sure how to get through this.
I would appreciate some words of advice from somebody who has experienced this first-hand.
Much appreciated
Sorry you find yourself here, New & it is always such a shock. We’ve all been where you are & what you describe is normal.
This stage when being diagnosed is always difficult, but it does get better once a treatment plan is in place & you know what you’re dealing with.
As we say to others, googling your diagnosis is best avoided as information on there is not specific to you, it can be out of date & will make any anxiety much more worse than it need be. Use this site or Macmillan if you need info.
There are others of your age on here who have gone or are going through treatment, so do visit the ‘Younger women’ thread if you haven’t already.
do come on here & chat whenever you want to, the support is great.
Hello, there a lot of us on here and we have all felt as you do now. So the first thing to remember I that you are not alone in all of this.
The diagnosis stage is the most anxious, scary time because it’s a big shock and there are so many unknowns. It will take you time to adjust and that’s ok. There might be times when you feel like you’re going mad…you are not.
It does get better. Hard to believe right now, but it does. Gradually there will be less uncertainty and you will have a treatment plan. You will then start to feel in control. Try not to think too far ahead as you will deal with this but just take one day at a time.
Don’t google, it’s scary, mid-leading and out of date. Do keep talking in here, reading posts, lurking, ranting, whatever helps. We are all here supporting each other. And yes, there are a lot of us…you really are not going through this alone.
I (and everyone on here) knows exactly how you feel. I am just a little ahead of you re diagnosis. I went a mammogram and called back for ultrasound and biopsy in Dec and too was told it was BC - horrible wait over Xmas and saw the consultant on 10th Jan for official diagnosis. Now booked in for lumpectomy on 1st Feb (but having MRI first to make sure mastectomy not required) I’m 49 and didn’t feel any lump - was found on trial screen and it’s 2.5cm. I was a mess when they first told me but 4 weeks later when you realise how many people survive this *beep* and you can come out the other side I feel a lot calmer - once you get your treatment plan you will feel so much more in control. It’s a bit like being afraid of the dark but when someone turns the light on you suddenly feel better because you can see! The people on here are amazing and there really isn’t anything better than talking to people who ‘empathise’ and have/are actually going through the same. I’m 49 years old by the way.
Thank you so much ladies, this means so much! I don’t know what I would do without all the support on this forum, nobody knows better what we’re dealing with -
ladybowler, this is my first post so must have been somebody else you’ve talked to.
I’ve stopped googling as it’s not at all helpful so right now just waiting for my appointment next Monday - i pray it hasn’t spread and can be cured.
I was thinking of talking to a phychologist, might help deal with emotions, what do you think?
I don’t have family in the UK, only frienkds so it’s even harder not having someone close to talk to…
Thank you so much ladies, your support means so much. I don’t know how you all have done it, you are real-life heroines and you can be so proud of yourselves. I know sadly there are too many of us but reading your posts makes me so hopeful. Right now I feel quite positive but I’m sure I’ll have meltdowns along the way. I will certainly continue being active here x
Have a good night everybody
I just wanted to say hi and say I’m completely here for you. I also found a lump in my left breast and was diagnosed on the day of all my initial tests. I’m 33.
I had my official biopsy results on 3rd January after a hellish Xmas/new year… I’ve been told I need chemo first, then an op to remove the lump but before that I’m having fertility treatment!! As im still childless and would like the option in the future.
My life has also been turned upside down, thinking I was ‘too young for bc’, but as each day has gone by, yep I’ve had wobbles (particularly on Sundays for some reason!) but I’ve also become stronger and ready to fight it.
This is the worst part for you, I promise! It’s the waiting, the unknown, the many many appointments but each day is one down! And one more to tick off the list.
Feel free to private message me whenever you want, but I completely know how you are feeling right now! xxx
Sorry you find yourself here, but this forum has been a lifeline for me.
Like many of the other stories here, I had the hellish wait over Christmas/New Year and learnt a week ago today that I have BC (this week has felt like a year!). At times I have felt utterly overwhelmed by this.
I agree with everyone esle, the waiting (and the fear) is the worst bit. It does get better, I promise.
We all have to adjust to a new reality and a new status that’s been thrust on us, as do our loved ones. And their response is not always helpful! Make yourself your number one, seek out new support. Counselling is a great idea. Come on here.
And I always say to myself, when those feelings of panic and fear hit me in the chest and the tears prick my eyes - this feeling will pass. It hurts, but it will pass. And it does.
Thank you so much for your replies -
Ann I’ll be treated on the NHS and they’ve been great so far and very supportive. I live in London and will be treated at the Royal Marsden - at least that’s where I’m having my appointments so far.
Charys, you’re so right xx
Pinkloz83, I’m so sorry you’re here - I’ve tried to pm you but didn’t figure out how!? I guess I will require fertility treatment beforehand as well but basically I’ve been preliminary told the same as you. I will have a more in-depth discussion next Monday when I get the biopsy results - I only hope it’s not too advanced…
Cartwheels, thank you so much for your encouraging words, I echo your thoughts, this forum is a lifeline for me as well - do you already have a treatment plan in place?
i was diagnosed on 21 December, and am having a lumpectomy and sentinel node removed tomorrow. I’m up and down to be honest. I consider myself a strong, capable woman, but this has rocked me a bit! And not knowing about the lymph nodes is the worst so far for me. ?
I had had a complete strop in the Vodafone shop yesterday and walked out - sooooooooo unlike me, and I felt really bad later and just wanted to cry! It was about something totally trivial and I thought I was going mad!
My husband banned me from googling, and the only places I have looked are in my red folder, provided by the bcn, and on here.
Reading the posts on here has really helped me, and made me feel like others really understand the emotional stuff.
Im so sorry that you’re having to deal with this at such a young age.
Big hug and solidarity fist bump!! ??. We can do this!
Jayne, thanks so much for your message - I’ll be thinking of you tomorrow and wishing you the best of luck. Let me know how it went
Your feelings are normal and it’s ok to cry when and where you feel like, you have to let your emotions out and that’s not a reason to be sorry for.
Good you gave up googling, I did the same once I realised it doesn’t help -
I am sending you big hugs, think positively and it’s going to be ok. Keep me updated xx
As others have said, im sorry you find yourself here. Im just a bit older than you (35) and had the same thing with gp, consultant and radiologist all expecting it to come back clear. The waiting stages are really tough and it takes time to find ways of coping, but you will. It does become easier once you have the start of a plan in place and also, for me anyway, when you see how incredible the people are who will be taking you through the journey. The breast care nurses are wonderful, have you been given their contact details?