you are perfectly normal, I think all the ladies here would echo the disbelief and shock they felt when diagnosed! Your head pretty much goes into a spin and it’s almost impossible to see ahead.
I have primary school children and like you, my first question was how do I tell them, it’s only a month since I found out and they were told and are coping!
Shame on your GP and thank god you are having tests done so quickly without weeks of waiting in between. My take has been to be open and honest and told everyone who is closely involved with us. There is never good timing, just when you think life is going great you get set this new challenge! This forum is great, you will find answers here and you can be yourself!xxxx
I agree that what you are feeling is totally normal. We are all different, but I told everyone. I work as a nurse and the support has been amazing. I’m a bit further down the line to you as having last chemo this friday.
Just take each step as it comes. Its easier when you have a plan of action so know what to expect. Just ask away if you have any questions; we’ve all been there!
Hi Van
Sorry you had to joins us but well done for going with your instinct. My GP also did not think it was anything to worry about although she did refer me. For which I am eternally grateful as I like you had BC. I have had a lumpectomy and got my results and starting chemo next week. You are perfectly normal in thinking why me what di I do wrong? I think everyone goes through the looking for something or someone to blame stage. In a strange way you do begin to feel better and more positive when you have your treatment plan. Ladies on here told me that and at the time didn’t know how I would ever feel better! Good luck tommorow I hope your results are good I will cross my fingers for you. x
Not sure how I am supposed to feel… put my house on the market today… not sure if thats the right thing to do at this time…but my kids needs something to look forward to…
I am stuggling with eating and have never had that problem before… feel sick all the time… prob nerves…
I am nervous about tomorrow as I know its from then on is when its gonna hit home…
Can you tell me what you did about work… I work full time… have got this week off but not sure what to do…
Hi Van
I had about 6 wks off after lumpectomy and lymph node removal. Managed to work thru 1st chemo, apart for a wk off after each cycle. Found the second type of chemo, tax, harder so gave in and now off sick. I’ll have to see how I am with rads. I can have six months full pay, but cant afford to go on half pay as divorced and have to pay all the bills etc myself.
This is my first visit to the site, as I was diagnosed on 17th Feb and had a lumpectomy and sentinal node biopsy last Wednesday. Currently very sore and tired but doing ok, it wasn’t as bad as I had expected, but all happened very quickly so still processing I guess.
On the subject of food, I found it very difficult to eat anything at all for the first few days after diagnosis and ended up just going into the supermarket and randomly picking things off the shelf that I thought I could force down…resulted in sitting eating prawns and ready cooked bacon strips for two days as it was all I could stomach. I hope it gets easier for you, maybe try some Complan if the foods too difficult, you will need all your strength to fight this.
I am a lone parent and had to tell my son who is 14 last Sunday, hardest thing i’ve ever had to do, but we’re doing ok. I agree with others who have said just be open and honest, childrens fantasies are often worse than the reality, and it’s best they hear it from you.
I am off to the hospital tomorrow for my results so keeping everything crossed. I work part time and am also at uni, so I am waiting till after tomorrow to decide what to do about both. I would say that if you have a choice about work, then do what feels right for you.
went to hospital today and got results… grade 3 tumour out…yippee… no lymph nodes affected… yippee
find out on tuesday about how long chemo and radio will be… prob between 5 and 7 months… now why do I feel so bloody down when it has gone… I was hoping I wouldnt have to have any other treatment…
have some up moments but also feel so emotionally drained and knackered… I feel like I have let people down… is that normal…
I know the next year will be a roller coaster and I know you all will understand that feeling but how do I explain that to close friends and family
We all feel the same as you at some point through this…drained knackered, weepy, guilty…you name it we have all suffered with it. There are people who can help through counselling… can you talk to your bc nurse about this? Where I am we’re offered complimentary treatments as well, like massage, reiki etc which some people find helps as well. If all else fails then come on here and have a moan or rant or just chat, theres always someone listening.
The one thing you haven’t done is let anyone down, you have to look after yourself now nothing else matters at the moment. I know that telling other people is really hard, I ended up comforting everyone else afterwards as they were so upset!!!
take care
phillippa x
Thankyou for your kind messages of support. My results were that it’s grade 2 and it hasn’t spread to lymph nodes…I now await Radiotherapy and have started taking Tamoxifen.
I felt a little like you Van, everyone was obviously thrilled by my news and I just burst into tears…I think it was the realisation that this is now part of my life and I will have to adapt to the changes in my body…particularly as a result of the Tamoxifen. It is great news of course and a couple of days on I am now realising that.
I was just wondering if anyone is taking Tamoxifen and could let me know how bad the side effects are…I know we’re all different, but i’m quite worried about it at the moment.