Nice things that people did for us when they didn't have to

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Keepthefaith’s suggestion on another forum has prompted me to set up this forum so that we can tell one another about the ‘Nice things that people did for us when they didn’t have to’

I’m going to tell you about some of the wonderful friends and family who have been so wonderful to me in the nine months to date since my diagnosis, and who continue to send me gifts and cards and still phone and email me regularly even after this amount of time.

Like the friends and colleagues who sponsored my sister on my behalf when she did the ‘Moon Walk’ in London’s Hyde Park this year, even though they don’t know my sister.

Like the friend who did a round trip of more than 120 miles to help me choose my wig.

Like the friend who asked me where I wanted to go with her husband’s airmiles.

Like the friend who bought me a beautiful raw silk scarf to celebrate the end of my radiotherapy treatment.

Like those who sent me countless beautiful bouquets of flowers and get-well cards.

Like the countless offers of lifts if my hubby couldn’t take me to chemo.

I could go on and on, but these are just a few of the nice things that people have done for me when they didn’t have to, but without whose support ‘My Journey’ these past nine months would have been so much more difficult.

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I had a wonderful friend who turned up on my doorstep holding out a scarf because I had just mentioned in a phone call that my hair was starting to fall out. I’ll never forget that.

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Hi Mazzalou.

Thank you for starting this thread.

I also have had some wonderful thing done for me since my diagnosis in march this year. Without my friends and family this would have been a very hard time for me.It is amazing how you find your true friends when you are in a difficult situation.

I decided to keep all my cards and letters in a scrap book so that if i feel down i can go through them and hopefully they will lift me as they did when i went through my treatment.

Thank you to everyone on BCC site including all you lovely ladies who have helped along the way.

Maj x

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Some of my nice things, acts of kindness have come from friends with breast cancer.
A large group of us from the Secondaries forums and from all over the UK started to meet up in 2004, many have since sadly died. A handful of us remain…and we still meet up when we can.
So thank you all for the shared lunches and the meets filled with laughter. The thoughtful random little surprises and cards sent through the post. The understanding and support through life’s ups and downs, for just being there.

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Hi Maj

I also have an album in which I have kept all the lovely cards and letters I have been sent, together with the cards that have accompanied my bouquets of flowers, as well as the now deflated balloon that my daughter tied to the end of my hospital bed!

Getting through breast cancer is all about team-work and I am so grateful that I have a wonderful team supporting me through what I would like to think is just a ‘passing phase of my life’, and the sooner it passes the better!!!

Mazzalou x

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Hi Mazzalou

I agree if we didn’t have team work we would not be where we are. Like you I just want this phase of my life over.

Maj x

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Since I started my Tax on 11th Nov I have virtually become a recluse, I just do not feel like seeing, or talking to friends or family (except my husband and daughters’) despite me ignoring them they ring regularly (I don’t answer the phone) and either leave lovely messages or speak to my husband/daughters, they understand how I feel and haven’t given up on me. Their messages are uplifting as I know they care so much, they all email regularly and I always reply to emails as find email communication easier to deal with. Tax really has floored me, it’s stolen my confidence and for most of the cycle I suffer extreme S/E, last Tax 12th Jan and can’t wait! I am so looking forward to seeing those close to me again, to be able to thank them for not giving up on me and respecting my way of dealing with BC and Tax.

I’ve received flowers by Interflora from people I’ve never even met; I’m a moderator on a family history site and my fellow mod’s (wonderful, caring people) have sent me two beautiful bouquets, I can’t tell you how warm inside that made me feel, to receive flowers from folks who’ve never met me.

I’ve received so many floral bouquets and cards from friends and family, and they keep on arriving. One friend sends a card every single week. I’ve had gifts of bath oil, hand cream, nail cream and candles - all such thoughtful gifts.

A friend emailed to say if my husband or daughters needed anything - be it practical or emotional help, she was there for them, I so appreciated this as I know my cancer journey is so difficult for them too.

My husband has been an absolute marvel throughout, he has shown only kindness, consideration, understanding, and always there to hold my hand, he has a demanding job but still finds time to cook all my meals and give me moral support.

My daughters’ too have been wonderful - showing understanding and helping wherever they can, I feel very privileged.

Now, I can’t wait to feel sociable again and thank all my friends and family face to face, not by email! I intend organising a big get together when all my treatment is over.

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Hi Libsue,

Nice to hear your thoughts. It will soon be over. Hang on in there. I had a bad time on tax also.

Your friends sound wonderful they will help with your family to get you back to some normality.

Good luck for the 12th

Hugs Maj x

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Thanks for your kind wishes, Maj, they mean a lot.

Folks here on BCC are all so kind.

I’m lucky that I have good friends, family and the support of members here.

Libby x

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You are welcome.

Land of nod is creeping up now halleluiah!
Sleep well

Maj x

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Hello wonderful ladies,
Well your post made me cry! I’m just starting out on this journey. I’m sat in hospital after having my snb and wle. My boob has doubled in size and is sore but not too bad. Just wait for the results and then the rest chemo and rad and tamoxifen.
My best friend has been amazing. She has rung me everyday and last night had my eldest to stay over whilst I’m in here. She brought me a chocolate bar saying bestest friend ever. My cousin turned up and took the kids out for the afternoon!
Another friend invited me and my kids for lunch the other day which is rare.
So many people have offered help. And my OH has been so lovely and caring.
Love fran xx

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This is a lovely thread and it has made me smile reading them this morning. It does restore faith in human nature when people rally to help doesnt it.

I have had friends and family supporting me too in particular my mother in law who travels 100 miles to stay with me for a week after each treatment to look after me, she bakes, cleans and is just lovely company

Most recently hubbys work colleagues held several fundraising stalls at work like raffles, cake making and tombolas to raise money for our justgiving page for bcc (hubby is growin hair till mine comes back and dying pink) but they didnt stop there most of the drivers donated their crimbo bonus giftcards for m&s to me! So I can treat myself to some new clothes etc when I get back to me, we were totally blown away by this, such kindness and true christmas spirit

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One of the things that touched us was a neighbour. We knew hew, and we had children at the same school but not in the same classes, so were not close friends or anything.

On the first chemo day we came home to a shepherd’s pie on the doorstep!

Paul.

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We were in the middle of moving house when I had my dx last year. Our move was a week after coming out of hospital having had mx, node clearance &ld recon. My neighbour came to clean the old house, my friends came and cleaned the new home, helped unpack, brought a meal. Other friends took our dogs for a fortnight, and set up a rota for my boy’s school run. I had many lovely flowers, cards, visits and gifts. Found out who my “true” friends are as others who I thought were close friends haven’t been seen since my dx.

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A packet of Reeses peanut butter cups with a little note through the door while I was on chemo. At the time they weren’t available in UK and a chap I used to work with knew how much I liked them and brought some back with him from a trip to the US. I didn’t know him at all well and I thought it was a lovely gesture. It made me cry, but in a good way.

Yes, you find out who you can rely on and who runs a mile!

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My lovely hairdresser, who cut my hair in October for the first time for 2 years (I had lost my hair twice because of 2 courses of chemo)… when I was ready to pay her, she said “no, it’s a gift”…
(PS. avatar photo shows the wig)

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Far too many wonderful things done by wonderful people to mention them all.

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Here Here.

We discover true God sent disciples and angels when we need them most.

Sometimes Im floored by the love and care people show. Its a shame we have to be ill for people to show their true caring nature, but its warming to experience it all the same and I for one am eternally grateful for the love shown to me since my dx.

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You are so right Libralady.

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My husband and sons contacted everyone, old work colleagues,neighbours from home, kids from other countries wed looked after, sons friends,and they all sent cards while I was having chemo. It was the fact that those snotty nosed kids (now young men) did that that really touched me!