Hello. I had a WLE and SNB in May, then 4 weeks of radiotherapy. I worked through radiotherapy up to the penultimate day, when it all got to me and I was in tears. Maggie’s advised me to take time out, and my GP immediately signed me off work. I’m tired and sluggish, am in early menopause due to tamoxifen and so feel like a balloon (with a short fuse and bad temper!), my joints are sore, I get lots of headaches, and am starting to feel really down. My initial 4-week sick line was extended by 4-weeks from the start of September and looks to be getting extended again as my dose of anti-depressants has just had to be increased. Meanwhile, work keep emailing and texting to ask how I am and now I have a call with Occupational Health on Wednesday which I’m dreading. I just want to hide in a cupboard where nothing can get me riled and no one can see my huge thighs or look to see if my chest looks different. I’m not sure what my purpose in writing this is - just reassurance I suppose that I’m not unusual in how I’m feeling. Thanks
Hi Karen what you are describing seems very normal to me. As you have worked through rads you have probably not given yourself time to process everything you have gone through since diagnosis, both physical and emotional, and your body and emotions have just said “enough” and forced you to slow down. You’ve had surgery, been zapped for 4 weeks and are in the early weeks of a drug that your body is adjusting to - I’m surprised you’ve kept going this long. You probably need to withdraw for a while and process all the stuff that has been going on, (but get out and do a bit of walking in the fresh air too as that will help your mood and your thighs). I’ve read posts from other people saying that they broke down in tears on the last day of rads, and certainly for me, although it wasn’t so dramatic, I did feel a bit low and “lost” for a while after the rads finished, probably because I hadn’t had time to think about things much till then, what with all the appointments and so on. You have a sick line from your doctor so Occupational Health should respect that, especially as you have worked through radiotherapy, which most people are not able to do - you might like to tell occ health that! You’ve had treatment for Cancer for goodness sake! Take it easy, do what your body tells you to do (afternoon naps followed by a cuppa in bed worked for me) and pat yourslef on the back for soldiering on this far without giving yourself a break. xxxxxxx
KarenMc
I am echoing what Optimissy has said. I remember saying to my boss that I was scared because I had been doing so well that I would crash and burn when it finally hit me. She immediately arranged for me to have six sessions of counselling which could be extended if I needed it. It was so incredible and helped me immensely, I did not feel I needed the extra sessions when I came to the end of the initial ones, that might be something you could try and I think it can be arranged with the OH team when you speak to them on Wednesday. Be honest with OH how you are feeling, they know that you have had breast cancer treatment and work accordingly with you.
Who keeps emailng and texting you from work, is it just your boss? Have they been out to see you, I am not sure what your company sickness policy is, but I had a visit from my line manager after 4 weeks and everything was done through her. If lots of other people are doing it as well, you could perhaps ask your line manager to politely ask them not to do this until you are feeling better, although they might just be concerned about you.
Remember OH are there to look after your health and wellbeing and their recommendations to your boss are based on that. When i had mine, which was a telephone consultation with a medic, he wanted me to have the time off through rads and 3/4 weeks after. I did actually negotiate with my boss to allow me to work 3 days a week but they would only allow me to do 4 hours max a day which I did and for a further 4 weeks after I finished.
Sending you hug
Helena
Thank you Optimissy64. Just reading your reply made me teary so I’m clearly not quite right yet!
I am finding the emails from work and arrangements to speak with OH intrusive just now and am getting stressed with it all. Hopefully when I speak with them on Wednesday they’ll get a better understanding of where I am in the process. Kx
Hi Helena
It’s my boss. She’ll send an email then a text to tell me that she’s sent me an email. I tell her when my next GP appointment is and by 8.30 am the next day have a text asking what happened. I’m sure she means well, but I’m feeling pressure to get back (rightly or wrongly!).
OH said they will be making recommendations to my employer - I’m just worried they recommend something I can’t cope with. Kx