OH in hospital now!

Oh it’s one thing after another!

On Weds night my OH was not feeling well and we thought it was bad indigestion so he had some of my Gaviscon, it settled and we went to bed.

He woke up at 2am with chest pains and went downstairs as he didn’t want to wake me up, and suffered for hours on and off until he eventually got worried enough to call NHS Direct. They sent out an emergency doctor to him who checked his heart and then said actually he thinks its Gallstones or something related to his gallbladder.

So my OH came and woke me up at 6.30am to take him to Huddersfield hospitals Assessment Unit. Poor OH was doubled over in pain :frowning:

So spent all day in hospital with him, eventually they decided they’ll do an ultrasound scan this morning, discharged him last night at 8.30pm and I’ve taken him to hospital for his appt this morning.

What a nightmare :frowning: Poor thing can’t eat without agony.
And on a selfish note, all these trips back and forth to hospital is shattering me out, I’m on Day10 now and I’ve been quite ill this last chemo and not sleeping brilliantly.

Also we’re struggling financially and his work dont pay when people are off sick, he’ll just get SSP. If he has an operation he’ll be off work 2 weeks apparently. Oh and I’ve got radiotherapy coming up soon.

Having a hard time of it. Didn’t want to say anything to OH as I dont’ want to turn it around to me and also because he can’t help it and he shouldnt’ have to feel bad about it.

So thought I’d come on here and have a moan instead :wink:
I do feel for my OH I really do, he’s been in agony and miserable.
Relieved it’s not his heart though, I coudln’t bear the idea of losing him!!!

Oh Kat,

It never rains, but it pours, hey? Really hope they work it out and mend him ASAP.

x

Oh El Katrano (I love that name by the way) you are having a horrid time.

Obviously I don’t know your circumstances, and I’ve never needed to look into it myself, but I believe MacMillan can give some financial help. If you believe the posters they can help with things like utility bills. I know we all hate taking ‘charity’ but actually it’s for times like this that it’s there.

Can’t do anything practical to help, so sending you a hug and a prayer.

I’m so sorry to hear this. I hope your OH starts to feel better soon and sending a hug for both of you!

Nymeria x

aww, u really have had a s**t time lately. One thing after another! If it’s gallstones i can sympathise with him, i had that 3 years ago & it was so damn painful. I had awful contraction like pains & was doubled over, crying & being sick so i do feel for him. But the op is fairly straightforward,usually laparoscopic as a day case, i had 2 weeks off but was ok after the first week.
U must be exhausted though, at least u can come on here & have a moan. No he can’t help it & shouldn’t have to feel bad about it but that doesn’t help u. I hope he gets it sorted out soon, sending ((hugs)) ur way. love Heather x

other than sending you support ther is nothing i can do to help you… but i would like to tell you what my dad said on the phone 22 years ago when my mum had colapsed on the floor during the night. He called the doctors and obviously decieded to give as much info as poss in one breath! he said " my wife has colapsed on the floor shes under dr philips" hope you get what me meant!She was dx with gall stones. and hope your OH recovers in good time, and def take rev cat advice, there is help out there if we ask!

Aww kat don’t it make u sick always something I’ve applied for a grant from mcmillian but they don’t give u very much they told me u can only have one and it’s a small amount but will be enough for one bill pm me if u want to no exact amount I hope oh feels better sn and u will sn pick up I also no there is transport for rads if u can’t get there call the hos tc Laura

Revcat - El Katrano is a nickname one of my best mates calls me, my name is Kate. Also fits in quite well with me being a mad cat lady :wink:

I’ve already had a Macmillan grant for heating actually :smiley: You can only have 1 lot. Thing is we had a contingency fund of a couple of grand a few years ago in case anything ever happened but over the past few years we’ve had so many rainy days it’s been a monsoon! So it all went and got replaced by loads of debt. One thing we’re going to do once can get a job is sort all our debt out and build up a rainy day fund, if this ever comes back we dont want to be in this position ever again.
I didn’t feel bad about using the grant, I’ve done loads of fundraising for Macmillan, Cancer Research, Marie Curie over the years (Mum died of cancer) so I just saw it as taking a bit back for all my hard work.

Thanks for your hugs and prayers xx

Charlotte - Ha ha ha, brilliant, bet that provided family anecdote entertainment for years! One of the things that always give me a smirk, just before my Mum died I was caring for her she got delirium and couldn’t communicate properly, I walked into her room and she said to me very earnestly “Turn me on, turn me on” and I said to her “You just asked me to turn you on Mum, I don’t think that’s what you meant is it?” and she smirked and muttered “no” and then I figured she wanted me to turn her light off. She could understand what I was saying but what was coming out of her mouth made no sense. Bless her, it was v frustrating for her.

Thanks for all your support ladies, nowt like a good pity-fest and moan to make one feel better! xxx

Big Ninja-esque hugs from me. I’ve had the gallstone thing and the only thing he’ll be able to eat without pain is clear fluids for now. It’s surprising how many foods have tiny bits of fat in them.

Hi Kate so very sorry for what you are both going through your right it does seem when the chips are down something else drops on us, I hope your OH recovers soon & the SE of your last chemo subside soon

sending love
Mekala x

Big hug from me too, life just sneaks up on you and kicks you in the a*** sometimes, what a bummer!

DaisyGirl xx

oh you poor thing, it seems to never rain but pour doesnt it. I hope they find out for sure whats wrong with him and sort it out, so hes not in pain anymore.

Big hugs. xxx

Here’s hoping you both feel a bit better soon love xxxxx

Lots of good wishes to you both, it is really tough when you suddenly realise you have to be giving support instead of being the one receiving it.
And very ouch re the financials.
Wishing him as fit as possible as soon as possible, and the minimum of side effects for you
Lavender
xx

oH oH - can only say that I agree with other posters; hoping you find enough strength to cope and that the op goes well so that your OH is on the mend before too long.

OH home now, they did the scan and said they can’t see anything at all. They said they’d have put money on it being gallstones as the symptoms were completely classic. (shame we didn’t get them to put money on it eh???)

So, they don’t know what is causing it. They’ve sent him home, told him to eat and then eliminate foods causing a problem, if it gets bad again to go to GPs with a diary of what hes eaten and what happened etc.

He’s convinced anything he eats will be painful so said he may as well carry on as normal and see what happens… he’s just had a Sausage, Egg and Spam Butty and he’s fine, no pain at all.

Very very odd. The night he got the pain he’d had lasagne and chips. Again, fatty unhealthy food.

Hoping he’ll be OK now but operation needed, thank goodness. He’s only lost 2 days at work, that’s not too bad.

Well, so far, so good, El Katrano.
4 years ago when I was very ill with something else, my OH became ill too, and was investigated for heart problems, exercise ECG, angiogram, etc, all clear, and eventually they decided he was having severe reflux which settled with medication.
He had a recurrence of very similar symptoms when I was just finished with chemo, I do feel the stress of being the supportive one had a lot to do with it.
Hope you both have a boringly quiet weekend

It’s funny because my stepdad said the same thing, it could be the stress of it all. He has been fairly wound with work at the moment, it’s making him unhappy and I guess he’s feeling trapped there right now as the provider. I’ve told him to start looking for another job if he’s that fed up, we know it’s not easy at the moment though, it took him 6 months to get this one and it’s not the best paid either.

I haven’t dared suggest stress to him as I think he’ll think his pain wasn’t real or something, he’s never had a panic attack or anything like that because of stress where it’s physically effected him. I have in the past so I know what it can do.

I’m looking after him but I have to say that I really do feel so shattered. I went to bed this afternoon for 2 hours, only got up because I’m worried I wont sleep tonight if I have any more. But I feel like I could sleep forever. Realised i haven’t had any afternoon naps for a whole week and my body is probably protesting as a result.

Kat u need to rest have u no friends or family that can pop in to help out just for a little while I know this is y last one but u still need to rest can’t y bcn offer any help tc laura

Ha ha Laura, no help from anyone, you’re kidding aren’t you.
When I’ve been really really ill and vocal about it, theres never been “Is there anything I can do?” comments off anyone. No offers to come round and do the washing or hoover and clean or shop.

My OH has ended up doing a lot as well as working (so basically he’s had to morph into a female wonderwoman persona) or I’ve just struggled in the daytime when I’m on my own and done it myself.

After the bowel problems I had it actually was very sore to bend and empty the dishwasher or fill it, it took me half an hour to unload a slimline dishwasher one day because I was having to be so slow and careful about it so I wasn’t in pain. My OH told me off for that when he got home but I could see how tired he was too and I felt guilty about it and didn’t want to ask him.

I rang and told OH’s Mum about him going to hospital etc, she didn’t ask if I was OK, if I needed help etc, I told her I was shattered with all the to’ing and fro’ing etc and that I couldn’t get rest. No offer.

We’ll just have to struggle on. To be fair, because they don’t see it a lot of the time they probably dont realise. And you think if someone has OH to help then they dont’ need you. I thought that with my Mum, she had my Stepdad and brother at home so they could do all domestic stuff, you don’t realise how tiring it is for other people as well unless you’ve been through it or know people who have.

Another side of being in 30’s is that most of my contemporaries haven’t had any experience of this so dont’ yet know the correct way to respond :wink: I’ll educate them eh? LOL.