Oh no. Feel like this is a bad dream

First scan consultant said benign breast age. So went and had other tests thinking I’m ok. 2nd scan said looks benign then mammogram so lead to a 3rd scan doc says its suspicious. She took 3 biopsies one under my arm said something about calsification . Results in a week. I have cancer don’t I ? Christ I am in such a state this feels like a bad dream . I’m 33 do never believed this could happen to me

Dear Carolina33

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Poor you. You WILL feel like its a bad dream. I still feel that, and I was diagnosed in October last year, had two surgeries, and still have 6 more weeks of chemotherapy. I also felt it would never happen to me, and I stand in front of the mirror in disbelief some mornings!

However. This time you are going through is the worst stage; when you don’t know what you are dealing with, and although it may turn out NOT to be cancer, you imagine yourself in every possible bad scenario right up to your funeral and grieving family! By the time you get your results, and remember, 8/10 lumps turn out to be benign, especially for a younger woman, you will have put yourself through all of that torment, and it is exhausting!

It is really difficult, but try as much as you can to keep busy, and focus on the day to day, until you know for sure what you are dealing with. It is fine to come on here and rant. There is loads of lovely support, and if things turn out as you fear you will have ladies on here to see you through … and if it turns out to be GOOD news in the end, well we want to hear that too!!

Thank you sweetie I’ve been reading your story and you are amazing and I think having struggled yourself giving advice to others is very kind and humble and am grateful x
im worried about the armpit biopsy and the vibe in the room was not good and I felt they were withholding truths from me does that make sense? They did say the actual lump was 16mm but I saw other things on the screen too which I presume are these calci things . I’m due to go to Egypt in 13 days I just want to know now. I wonder how many Turn out non cancerous when they say it doesn’t look good though :-/

I just want to add that my whole body aches and I feel exhausted. Im hoping that its the stress and shock as opposed to being ill.

Giving advice to others comes naturally to me. It’s following that same advice I find difficult! :wink:

I am sure your body aches and exhaustion is due to stress. This, too, will pass! :slight_smile:

I’m sure they were not withholding truths from you as such. But if we shared all the possible diagnoses with our patients before we know the actuality, we would probably end up frightening a lot of people silly for no good reason. Did you ask them what they thought it was?

When I had my biopsy, I deliberately did not ask what they thought as I felt until the results were in, nobody would know for sure, although it was obviously suspicious for cancer. I suppose I didn’t want to put them on the spot when all they could give me was conjecture.

No, this is definitely the hardest time. If you are really not coping, sleeping etc, you might try seeing if there is anything your GP can give you to calm you a bit. Although, when I went to mine, he decided I was depressed and prescribed antidepressants. I took them for a few days. They didn’t help me sleep, but when I did get to sleep I had really the most peculiar dreams! Not scary stuff, but truly wacky! Anyway, I decided I was stressed to the eyeballs rather than depressed, and when I got my surgery date soon afterwards, I immediately felt better and stopped taking them! :slight_smile:

Yes I asked them but it wasn’t explained well or I was zoned out in panic. I’m a bit sore tonight and pulled my blooming dressing off one site already . But I feel calmer aim a way than before today although I imagine by next Thursday ill be in a panic! What I can gather is the lump they are not worried about but other areas shown on mammogram. Is it unusual to have a biopsy under the arm?

Yes I have lots of meds as suffer with depression a lot on and off so may take some sleeping pills but I actually feel like I will sleep tonight I guess the panic and crying had warn me out a bit tonight x

Results day tomorrow. 8 days of pure hell. Just want to start enjoying life again. Have to come home to my two kids straight after who are 9 and 11. I hope it’s good news.,

Good luck Carolina. I hope you are taking someone with you to your appointment? Whatever they tell you will go in one ear and out the other, so an extra pair of ears is invaluable.


I’m taking my dad do you tthink it’s ok him being a man talking about breasts lol x
thank you :slight_smile:

Good luck Caroline, hope your dad comes round to your way of thinking.

Poemsgalore xx

He’s been better lately. The weird thing is ladies, I have ALL the symptoms of benign breast disease. Pain in both breasts before period , swollen and the lump DEF gets bigger before and during my period. Last week it was bigger and had just started my period.

Consultant initially diagnosed me with this : may be being over positive here. But I’m just going to go with an open mind
thanks all x