Hello to all over 60’s who have have had breast cancer, I love to read the comments on this web site, I found them very inspiraring, as an over 60’sperson myself I wondered how other’s in this age group cope. I have so much admiration for the young mom’s (and dad’s) who seem to have enourmous courage and “get on with it”. There is no history of breast cancer in the whole of my family (no close relatives/cousins/anunts etc) so when I was diagnosied with it last September. it was a bolt out of the blue, I chose to have a lumpectomy followed by radiotherapy, and now have mild lymphodemia in left arm, during my radiotherapy treatment my mom died suddenly. so last 12mths not been great. It is good to talk to other in the same place, I know family and friends offer great support, but you can never explain fully how you feel once you have had breast cancer. Is this how other feel. I have found since my diagnoisis and recovery the need to do thing now and not put them off till another day or when I retire, to this end hubby and I are off to Spain a couple of days - and get this - on a motorbike!!! never done before.
Have any of you got a story to tell of what you have or would like to do since being told you have breast cancer, that maybe you would not of thought off or put off "until later "
Would love to hear from you.
lol
Nanna Cooking
hiyah, well ive always wanted to go abroad! sounds daft dosnt it but ive never been before ,think its because im scared of flying and claustrphobic!!!but since going inside the mri machine im getting better can even go up in a lift now! so hoping to get to spain or france next year. thats if i can save enough money by then as insurance etc is so high now.
Good for you! my mother in law is over 70 and for the last few years has been putting everything off for another day or putting off things she wants to do with her husband to help her duagther with the children. I think whatever age we are BC makes us reaise that we only really have today and we have to make some pretty definite and sharp choices about how we want our lives to look.
take care
cathy (age 44)
I will be 70 in November and first had BC in 1990 and again last year. Since 1990 I have been trying to do all the things on my “one day” list. I now go heliskiing in Canada every winter as well as skiing in Europe with my wonderful children and grandchildren. Sadly my OH is virtually housebound after years of smoking so we are very restricted in what we can do together but I do go to yoga classes and the gym 3 times a week and enjoy walking. I plan to be around for my grandchildrens’ weddings! I have always done my best not to allow BC to interfere with my lifestyle on all aspects but it can be difficult especially if you appear fit and healthy on the outside. Only people on this forum understand how you really feel when you have had BC.
My mum died last year, after a very unexpected & short illness, at the age of 72. She was still saving for a rainy day! I was dx with BC only three weeks later at 44. Those two events coming so closely together have made me doubly determined not to put things off, but to make the most of any opportunity that comes my way. As Cathy said, whatever our age we feel the need to live for today in the way that others may not.
Nanna - I hope you really enjoy your motor biking. Go for it!
Hi Nanna
Granny here 
Like you, the younger mums on here simply amaze me with their courage and humour. I know I wouldn’t have the strength to deal with the disease as well as looking after children. So let’s hear it for all the young mums and dads
Yes, you’ve had it rough over the last 12 months, what with your dx and your mum passing away. You’ll get lots of support on this site.
Oh, and well done on the motorbike, you brave lady! A friend of mine passed her motorbike test in her 60th year and she’s never looked back!! She and her toyboy go all over the show on their bikes.
I was dx late 2005, breast cancer with bone mets. I now have 28% lymphoedema in left arm. I just get on with it, and do what I do when I can do it. We’ve just had two weeks at our caravan on Anglesey following our younger son’s wedding, and what a day that was!! There were times last year when I was on chemo though that I thought maybe if they wanted me at the wedding they’d have to bring it forward, but I’m glad I didn’t say anything. I completed chemo, recovered in time, my hair grew back, and I had a thoroughly wonderful time, even dancing to the ceilih (spelling?) band.
Thinking we may go on a cruise to Alaska next year if we can save up. But I’m equally happy at my caravan in Wales
Good luck to us all.
xx
I too cannot imagine having to cope with this at a younger age with Kids … they are a credit they are so strong ,brave and selfless.
I was 52 when dx last Oct and have grown up kids ,have coped very wekk but as I havent got the stamina that I used to have that frustrates me cos I used to walk for miles with my two huskies now since mast havent got the strength in my arm to keep them under control …so just go out for lots o9f short ones but they dont mind …dont know if I will ever get back to full fitness but I am going to have a dman good try …this bloody disease has outstayed its welcome as far as Im concerned and it aint gonna stop me doing what I want to that is for sure xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Oh you wonderful, wonderful people, thank you so much for your comments, probably like most of us I thought maybe I was the only feeling like I do, Olivia07 you’re right, only people who have had BC can fully understand how we feel inside, lots of brave “faces”, and it’s good to know you’re not alone, My grandchildren are between 12yrs and 9 yrs - with another on the way in December, making 4 and I too plan on being around for all four weddings!!!, walking frame, deaf aid and anything else needed. You sound as if you have a great attitude to BC, I hope I can develope the same.
Aroma, I am positive you will be up in that aeroplane before too long, and you will love Spain. We would like to go to France too, eldest daughter not long back from holiday there and made it sound lovely.
KatherineM, I know how you mother in law feels, until BC my family - daughter & grandchildren definialety came first, even my hubby used to tell people he was about fifth in line for my attentions, but since BC you realise this is not a dress rehearsal, this is it, tell you mother in law to go for it, the kids will enjoy hearing about what she gets up, we only have memories to leave our families, they might enjoy any money left to them, but it’s the memories we leave that they will talk about.
RoadRunner, I truly know how you feel, people think just because your’re older we except the passing of family more easily, but its just as hard no matter what age, losing a mom is even more so, especially when you are going such a traumatic time as dealing with BC and it’s treatment, I always felt my mom was the only person in the world who truly knew me and cared and worried about me constanstly, a hugh hole left now, I know my hubby and girls and grandchildren love and care for me but its not the same. We must not forget we are all moms.
You have all made me feel so much better in every way, I will go on my biking holiday thinking of you all and will catch up with you all on return. If there is any way I can help any of you, just talking thing thru, having moan, or bouncing ideas around, PLEASE get in touch.
lol
Nanna
Hi Nanna,I am 64 dx 2006 had WLE chemo and rads.I too ache for all the young women on here.I have grandchildren from 10 to 21months with another due next Feb.Good for you with the biking.Ambitions?Well I have travelled widely and live a full and joyful life with a fantastic husband.I just want to ‘be’ for as long as possible.I want to read lots of books,and I would really like to see the Eiger again and visit my son and his family in Turkey.Ladies I want to LIVE!!!
I was 54 at diagnosis and now 59, with a eight month count down to getting my state pension. (as I have a recurrence which isn’t responding very well to treatment it could go either way but I’m quietly confident I might get there).
I don’t have children (a choice) or close family and so facing the stark reality of my own mortality and the meaning of my life is perhaps rather different than for those of you whose genes will continue through your children and grandchildren. We are all children Nanna but we are not all moms!
I think the whole living one day at a time and living in the moment stuff is actually pretty hard. “We care about tomorrow because we remember yesterday. Mental time travel is at the heart of what makes us human,.” (Thanks to Sam Woolston in the Guardian in March for these wise words in a different context.)
I have a sort of 100 things I want to do before I die list, but nothing grand or terribly ambitious as I’ve never been into white water rafting or abseiling.
I hope to live for as long and well as I possibly can…don’t we all? but I don’t want a long drawn out death…thats my biggest fear about having cancer…please make it quick and painless is my daily thought.
In the meantime I enjoy times with my partner and my friends, short break holidays, dabble at a part time job, write a bit, read a bit more, eat nice food, have existential anxst about the meaning of life and death and the universe, and hope that those whose lives have collided with mine will remember me for a while.
Jane
Hi GrannyScouse,
Thank you for your comments, really pleased to hear you had a great time at your sons wedding, it must have meant so much to him and all your family that you were there. Your friend sounds as mad as me, I don;t ride the bike but have been pillion for too long. More power to you and your friend.
Horace, I think you have touhed a nerve with your “I just want to be” phrase, I think thats at the basis of it all, it gets a bit scary at times and silly thought go around in your head - will it re-occur, will be be more serious next time, will I be able to cope as well next time - although (fingers/toes and everything else crossed) you’re absolutly right GrannyScouse loads of support on this site. I think its great that we can all come together and “sound off” on how we feel in a way some of us can’t do even with our closest family it’s that “brave face” again.
JaneRA
Thanks for reminding me we are not all moms, please don’t feel alone in this, I am discovering there is a whole new family of friends on this site just willing to give all their support to each other, I find that a great strengenther. I’m not really a live for today person, but I find that since BC last year along with other unexpected happening, it has made me feel that if we are able to do something we were planning “when I retire or at this age or that birthday or next year” sooner then we should get on with it and not wait till retirement/that special birthday/next year etc. who knows if we will be here then and if we are will we still be able to do these things. My son-in-law -he will be 40 next week - lost his mom in January to lung cancer, she was 59, he past a comment a few days ago which made me feel this way. He was planning, with my daughter, that when he retired he was going to buy a holiday home in France, he has bought his holiday home in France last week, my hubby asked him why now, he replied “my mom’s biggest wish was to go on a cruise, and she and dad was planning to go on a cruise when they retired, she never made it”
One thing is clear to me we are all survivors/fighters and none of us will go without a fight there’s life in the “old biddies” yet.
lol
Nanna Cooking
Mazaroo I love you outlook, your dogs sound lively, they will certainly help you build your strength up, spot on, this bloody disease can go. not needed.
lol
Nanna Cooking
Dear Jane I want to tell you that I will always remember you. Your pragmatic courage and clear vision have often held me stable even when I didnt like what you said!I talk about you often.Thank you.Valxxps.You will probably outlive me I meant that I would remember you for all of my life!
Hi Nanna and all,
Just to say I heartily agree with motorbiking as a way of taking your mind off things… I can jump on mine and within an hour I’m out of London and staring at the sea, having a cup of tea in Epping Forest or visiting friends in rural Suffolk.
There are quite a lot of good things about being a middle-aged tearaway. Clearing your head of stuff the hospital has left there is one of them. A bit of vroom renews, refreshes, and leaves me more ready for the next round.
So ENJOY your holiday, Nanna…and everyone else, pass your tests and I’ll see you down the Ace Caff sometime. And let’s raise a glass to all our sisters fighting this b*stard disease.
L. x
dear Jane, you have always stood out on this forum with your intelligent and realistic approach to matters. I always check to see what you have said about a topic, and your comments been of enormous help to me on countless occasions - so agree with Horace I will think of you for as long as I am around!
Wishing you many more years of enjoyable times
Sarah
Hi everyone, just to say thank you all for your comments, I was a bit down and not really looking to holiday as much as my hubby would like, but thanks to your views, advise and encouragement Im looking forward to going, We’re off at FIVE o’clock in the morning, will be thinking fo you all and will let you know how we get on, should have a couple of story to tell and have a good laugh at. Keeping biking Lanterna and see you on 18th July. Chins up and positive thinking, all of you still having treatment, I hope is going well, with the love/encouragement and sense of togetherness, BC doesn’t stand a chance.
lol
Nanna
Hi everyone,
Nanna Cooking here, back from motorbike holiday in Spain, excellent hols, found Spainish people very warm & friendly, we stayed half way up a mountain surrounded by olive groves and shaded by grape vines, in a village with about six house, bar/cafe, pharmacy and small supermarket, Oh! and, three sheep in a pen who were looked after by elderly Spanish man by the name of Antonio - I kid you not.
Back down to earth with a bump on Monday tho. just before hols check showing very high blood pressure - 205/105 - it has been high throughout the year peaked once at 205/115 - I already take two types of medication for it, nurse suggested maybe another tablet would help, but do not want to add to “shopping list” of pills, any advised to take hols and go back for check, back on Monday and not a great change 180/97. I have been told that Tamoxifen can in some cases raise blood pressure, but I’m also on trail drug for detection of early signs of breast and bowl cancer, which is an antinflamatory based, also told antinflamatories can also rasie blood pressure, so G.P to tomorrow to have a chat, may need to come off trail drug, really do not want another pill.
But best news this week, Lympho check up today and have been discharged, when first diagnosed in November last year
had very mild lympho - 10% during the year this has reduced to 7%, 3%, 5% and to-day 0.2%, radiographer was well pleased and so was I, I know it is not curable, just have to be careful not to aggrivate condition from now on. Still get really tired tho.
I hope everyone is ok and feeling well/better, and that treatments/tests and results are positive, let me know.
JaneRA, I sincerley hope your condition is now responding or at least showing signs of responding to treatment and suitation is turning around for the better, giving you a more to look forward to.
Still think you’re all amazing, lol
Nanna
I want to swim NUDE in the Mediterranean.
talking of swimming nude, I’ve done it off the island of lobos between fuerteventura and lanzarote which I think is off africa so maybe not in the mediterranean. I did it way before my diagnosis of breast cancer though. I think I was about 42 or 43 at the time. It was a great sensation to do but I did get really bad sunburn as I was on lobos all day between 10 and 4 with only factor 8 suncream and absolutely no shade. the more efficient germans had all over tans and huge sun breaks/umbrellas so they managed to look an even brown although they had awful wrinkles from over exposure. The nude men kept walking up and down the beach smiling in my direction - they were all men of a certain age so I can’t say I was that tempted. my ambition is to go back but not to fuerteventura, lanzarote was much nicer and also seems to look favourably on nudism
mole
Hi all I thoroughly agree with you all … We are strong woman on here …xxx Ihave travelled widely before BC,I got to go on business trips with my oh to Malaysia and Singapore,Borneo ,Bali that neck of the woods . as I was only dx last Oct,havent had a chance to get away yet looking towards November December time …I somehow dont think that this time the top of my bikini will be coming off !!! Ha Ha …my husband hasnt even seen it prop let alone the inhabitants of another country ,never swam naked intentionally,but went to the Maldives and lost my cozzie diving off the landing stage for the sea planes didnt realise how high it was as it was drunken night time frolics another Maz in another life …in daylight it was a miracle we didnt kill ourselves !!!
Mole I was Traumatised in Crete with the naked German men …they looked lke huge wrinkly pepperamis it was horrendous we went for a walk and found the beach
and as you say they all strut their stuff in various shapes and sizes and all over 70 .not tempted either .
anyway all this talk of travel is making me restless gonna look at hols on the internet xxxx
Chat to you all soon